Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat
by Dr Megalomania
Summary: Um, okay so... It's raining, Kero gets cold, and wet, and feverish, and then he keels over... not quite dead, but enough to freak out Yue and gang... so what happens? It's E.R only Cardcaptor Sakura Stylin'...
1. Everyone's so mean to me!!

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be!  
  
Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
  
  
Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat.  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
  
  
Part One: Everyone's *So* Mean To Me!  
  
It was raining *again*.  
  
Heavily.  
  
Really heavy.  
  
He looked up at the sky with disgust. //If it's the Master's reincarnation again, I'll kill him! // He promised himself.  
  
"Kero! Circle around once more please, Yue says he can't sense anything!" His new Mistress called. He sighed and took off, they'd been out here for the last hour . . . // In the pouring rain and it was cold and windy and cold some more and windy and . . .// he couldn't think of any more words to describe the conditions that he was experiencing so he made some up, //Freezeaboopbalula, and . . . // he ran out of made up words. "IT'S COLD!!" He roared.  
  
"That does not matter, Keroberos!" Yue pulled up beside him, "Just follow the Mistress' instructions."  
  
"I'm cold! I'm getting reaaaally wet! My wings are going to freeze! I'm even getting wet under my helmet!!" Kero kept this line of complaint up until they reached a suitable altitude to survey the entire park. He closed his eyes, and reached out with his senses.  
  
There was Yue, a cool amethyst aura. //Just as cold as the night. // Kero groused, //Of course he won't feel the cold! //  
  
There was the Mistress, a pink *warm* aura. //Warm like the blanket that awaits me when I get home. //  
  
There was the Gaki, a grass green aura. // . . .// Kero thought, // Lucky for him, I'm too cold to think of any insulting comments or I'd really rip it outta him!//  
  
Then there was Sakura's best friend, she had a pale violet aura, // if Tomoyo was the Mistress, SHE wouldn't make me come out in this horrible weather . . . then again, she wouldn't be able to sense anything . . .// Kero frowned.  
  
"What is it?" Yue had noticed his frown, "What do you feel?"  
  
"Oh, nothing." Kero quickly returned his attention back to his task.  
  
There was a familiar red aura near-by. // Red? Red, red, red, red, who do I know has a red aura? // Kero tried to place the aura . . .  
  
"Sponge toy! Hurry up it's cold down here!!" Meilin screamed up at him. //Of course, red's Meilin.// He turned his senses away from her. The Gaki's fiancée had recently returned. Kero shivered with a chill that had nothing to do with the weather.  
  
"I'm cold, I'm so cold, I'm so very cold, I'm so very, really, cold, I'm so very, really, muchly cold, I'm so-"  
  
"Keroberos, concentrate on your Mistress' order." A chilly cerulean aura came to join the amethyst glow of Yue's.  
  
"Shut up, Suppi! He's right!" A neon-pink aura nearly blinded his senses.  
  
"Ruby! Back off slightly. You're blocking my sight." Kero muttered.  
  
Ruby flew down to the ground, calling back to him; "I know when I'm not wanted."  
  
"Really? Coulda fooled me!" Yelled an irritated ginger aura. "Oi! Mystical guardians of Cl-ow . . . !"  
  
"Clow! It rhymes with glow and flow!" Yue called back just as irritated, his robes were just sucking the water up and he was having a hard time staying in the air under the weight.  
  
"And Moe!" added Kero.  
  
"Kero I said 'concentrate'!" Yue snapped.  
  
"I'm cold! And now to mention it, it's dark!" Kero moaned.  
  
Sakura was huddled with her brother under a large umbrella; she peeked out, "Anything Kero?"  
  
Kero did another sweep of the park, aside from Eriol's deep violet aura; there was nothing of immediate concern.  
  
"NO!!" He yelled down at her, "CAN WE GO HOME NOW? I'M-"  
  
"COLD!!" The whole group yelled at him, YES! WE GATHERED THAT!!"  
  
Thankfully Fujitaka was away for a bit. Or else he would be highly freaked out by his children's company and the large winged lion that stood shivering in his hallway.  
  
"I don't think you truly grasp how cold I am." He sat down obstinately. "I'm really, really, cold and since I don't have any hands I think you should dry me."  
  
"Bah!" Yue started to undo the clasp that held his belt on and peel off the sodden clothes. "I have to dry my hair before I return to my other form." He threw a towel over Kero's head. "Dry yourself."  
  
Kero threw his head back and the towel landed, with practiced ease, upon his back. He padded, dripping rainwater, into the living room. "Someone needs to dry me," He said. "Now."  
  
The Gaki was ringing his battle costume's sleeves out. "Do I look like your handmaiden? My clothes are well over a century old. They are more important."  
  
Kero turned to the next nearest person, "I'm cold and wet, and I'm not getting any drier. Dry me."  
  
"Don't worry when you turn back to that sponge toy of a false form, you'll soak up all the water! OH HO HO HO HO!!" Meilin laughed at her distinctly un-funny joke.  
  
Kero sniffed, his nose felt wetter then ever before and colder. "Mistress, you'll help me, won't you?"  
  
Tomoyo quickly stepped in, "No, no, first, we'll help Sakura-chan to get dry then we'll come back and dry you."  
  
And with that, she quickly pushed his Mistress up the stairs. He looked at his last option.  
  
"Don't even open your mouth." Touya folded his arms, he was just as wet as everyone else, "I'm going up to change."  
  
Kero sniffed again, and padded into the kitchen. He nudged the door open.  
  
//Good ol' kitchen// he thought, //You'll keep me warm!//  
  
But the kitchen was freezing cold; the window had been left wide open when they had left in such a hurry.  
  
// Et tu kitchen? // Kero thought bitterly.  
  
  
  
"Now then . . . Keroberos . . ." Yue said as he descended the stairs again, his hair was sufficiently dry now, and he came down in search of his brother. He stepped into the sitting room. The two Li's had changed from their battle robes in to more drier and comfortable attire; Touya was glaring at the Li clan head. Yue shook his head, he didn't really know what had set off their argument at their first meeting, his other form, Yukito had declined to ask Touya.  
  
"Has anyone seen Keroberos?" He asked, "If I don't get him dry soon; he'll not only moan about it for the next few days, but he'll start to smell of Wet Cat-ness."  
  
"Wet Cat-ness?" Meilin asked him, "What on earth does wet cat-ness smell like?"  
  
"Trust me . . . you don't want to know." He turned as he heard the Mistress and her friend descend the stairs. "Mistress?"  
  
"Yes, Yue-sama?" her pretty, emerald eyes blinked at him.  
  
He frowned slightly at the suffix, it wasn't polite, as *she* was the Mistress. "Have you seen Keroberos?"  
  
"Wasn't he down here?" She asked the people behind him. The shrugs she got answered her question.  
  
"Where would he have gone?" Asked Tomoyo.  
  
After some serious thought, Sakura answered, "The kitchen!"  
  
Yue turned and strode into the kitchen instantly.  
  
The group settled back, Touya and Syaoran still glaring at each other, Meilin, Sakura and Tomoyo looking at the digital display on Tomoyo's camera, looking over the footage hoping to figure out what she had felt that evening.  
  
A tranquil quiet settle over the group.  
  
  
  
A quiet which was shattered by Yue's yell, his voice was laced with an unfamiliar fear.  
  
  
  
  
  
"KEROBEROS!!"  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
And now it's time for LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
DrM: konnichiwa!! I know I'm supposed to working on the 'Master Clow' story, but here's another ficcy I want to start . . .  
  
Sakura: But?  
  
DrM: I'm going to have to stoop to begging, and threats . . . if you'd like me to continue, *please* review!! If I don't get any, I'll . . . KILL KEROBEROS!! Dun Dun DAH!!  
  
Yue: As if that'll be a bad thing!  
  
DrM: [evil voice usually reserved for annoying computer] *You'll* be next!!  
  
Yue: All right people, you heard the lady! Read the ficcy, if it makes you smile, makes you angry, whatever, just click the little button and leave a little review. I suggest you put something like, 'Stop Threatening That Gorgeous Moon Guardian . . .'  
  
DrM: you're so full of it! Please remember to R&R people, I'm still divided over making this a humorous or an angst-y one!! Thanks for your time! Ja Ne!! 


	2. What’s wrong with him?!

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be!

Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make!

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat.

By Dr Megalomania.

[A/N: I've decided to go Humour with just a touch of Angst. . . I hope it works. . . (crosses fingers) here goes]

Part two: What's wrong with him?!

Sakura was the first respond to the terrified yell, and sprinted into the kitchen. She skidded to a halt when she saw her moon guardian lift Keroberos into his arms. Sakura gasped when she realise what was wrong. Keroberos was unconscious.

Touya poked his head around the door, and calmly instructed Yue to bring Keroberos into the living room. 

"What's wrong with him?" Meilin jabbed the sleeping lion in the ribs.

"Don't do that!!" Yue snapped and slapped away her hand. She stared at him in amazement; the stoic guardian rarely displayed that much emotion.

 "What's wrong with you?" She asked Yue. Yue looked up sharply at her and scowled.

"You might be making it worst!"

"Make it worst?! The sponge toy is probably just faking it!!" Meilin cried; "he's just probably doing this because nobody wanted to dry him. Look! I can prove it!!" She jumped up and ran into the kitchen.

When she returned she held a small bowl of pudding in front of her. "See? He won't be able to resist this!"

Meilin thrust the pudding in front of Kero's sleeping features. "Hey! Sponge toy!! Look what I got for you!!"

Kero didn't even bat an eyelid. Sakura knelt beside Meilin and shook Kero's shoulder gently. "Kero? Meilin has some pudding for you? Why don't you wake up and have a taste?"

Still no response, "Kero? Please, you're scaring me. Kero please, wake up, wake up." Her voice started to quiver.

"Keroberos, wake up this instant! You are making our mistress worried!" Yue snapped; his voice betrayed a real fear, under the stern command.

When this failed to rouse the sleeping lion, Tomoyo slipped a thermometer under his heavy lips. Sakura frowned slightly, and reached over to stroke his fur. "Yue? Has this ever happened before?"

Yue stood and folded his arms; he bowed his head and closed his eyes.

"Well?" Snapped Meilin, "Answer her!"

"Let him think," Syaoran clamped a restraining hand on her shoulder.

Tomoyo ignored all of this and turned to Touya, she spoke quietly so Sakura couldn't hear them. "He has a fever; we need to lower his temperature first before we can assess what he really has." 

Touya thought about methods they could use. "I'll run a cool bath; we'll use that."

"Good, but make sure we have warm towels to dry him with, it may make him worst if we keep him too wet for long."

"Hai." Touya stood and strode out of the room.

Sakura looked at her friend who was peering at the thermometer. "Is he okay? What's wrong?"

Tomoyo's violet eyes looked at her with concern, "He has a hot fever, Touya's going to run a cold bath, and after we get his fever down, we should be able to tell what he has exactly."

"Fever?" Yue said quietly. He eyes were wide open and staring at the purple haired girl with fear.

She nodded. He paced over quickly and knelt down beside Keroberos. "Are you sure?"

"Why?" Sakura asked, //Maybe this had happened before.// she thought worriedly.

She was shocked to hear Yue's voice suddenly take on a scared tone, he suddenly sound like a child. As he spoke she realised he was speaking with the voice of a child that had never come to terms with a terrible memory. 

"Clow Reed died when he got too hot . . . I mean it's one of the first things that happened." Yue hadn't ever really dealt with Clow's death, it had been sudden and just a few years after he and Keroberos had been created. A fever had been among the first symptoms. He had just assumed that Clow could never die, but he did, he had also assumed that he and Keroberos could never fall ill, but now Kero was. He rested a worried hand on Kero's chest; the lion's breaths were fast and uneven. His heart beated twice the normal speed, and the skin, under the fur, was warmer than usual to the touch. 

Sakura watched all of these emotions flit over her normally impassive guardian's face. "Has this happened before Yue?" She asked patiently.

Yue nodded silently.

"When?" Asked Tomoyo, "Maybe we could heal him just like the last time."

"This didn't happen to Keroberos." Yue looked at her, "It happened to Clow."

Syaoran knelt beside Meilin; he gazed at the worried guardian. "What did you do to cure Clow then?"

Yue swallowed and returned his gaze to Keroberos' heated body. "We couldn't." He stated in a hushed voice, "He died."

Touya returned and placed a hand on Yue's shoulder, "Don't worry we can help him, we'll do the best we can."

"What if your best isn't good enough?" Yue whispered despondently. He hadn't recovered from Clow's death very well, and in some way depended on Kero's raucous behaviour to keep him distracted. If Kero died, he'd not only loose control of his old demons, but also have to face new ones.

"If that should happen . . ." Touya squeezed the depressed angel's shoulder a little harder. "We'll be there to help you."

Yue looked up at the assembled group and realise that, should the worst ever happen and Kero did leave him, he wouldn't be alone.

Sakura leant over one guardian to grasp the hand of the other, she smiled best she could. Trying to tell him silently that she would try to protect him from the past he feared so. She blinked in surprise when she thought she saw a smile flit across his lips, and when she felt his cool hand squeeze hers back. Sakura turned her attention back to Tomoyo. "What do we need to do now?"

"We need to get him up to the bath, and cool his body and lower his temperature." She said, she looked at Yue, "Can you carry him? Or will he be too heavy?"

-------------------------------------------

And now it's time for LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!

DrM: Konnichiwa!! Temptation to . . . put in . . . Famous quote . . . too much!

Yue: You'll do nothing of the sort!! It doesn't even have proper grammatical structure! I would never say anything like that!!

DrM: Fine! I'll put it in here and then the readers can decide where they want to read it as the last line from the story or not . . .

Yue struggled briefly to lift his brother; his skin seemed hotter than before. Once he had Keroberos' lion form comfortable in the cradle of his arms, he stood and looked down at Tomoyo, "He ain't heavy, he's my brother."

Yue: HOW COULD YOU?!

DrM: Very, very easily. I'm sorry; I just couldn't resist the temptation. I'm sorry!!

Yue: So you damn well should be! Well, that's it for another chapter. And I just like to mention, DrM may or may not update this for a bit. . . [glares at DrM, and shakes head disapprovingly] she's supposed to be "working" on school work. . .  

DrM: [mutters] stupid coursework, why isn't there a Clow card that can take care of English lit coursework. . . [starts to mumble about shooting the author of book that DrM is studying] Please R&R!! it helps make me work faster!! 


	3. I’ve got the what?

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be!  
  
Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
  
  
Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat.  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
  
  
Part three - I've got the what?  
  
[Also a itty-bitty warning: there is a tiny bit about the suggesting of suicide . . . it's really tiny! Honest! I swear this ficcy *WILL* get funnier as Kero gets better. . .]  
  
  
  
As Yue gently lowered Kero into the bathtub, and Touya took a damp cloth and pressed it against the lion's forehead, Touya grumbled, "This would be soooo much easier if his wings weren't out."  
  
Tomoyo pulled Syaoran aside, "Take Sakura-chan to her bedroom, she looks too tired."  
  
He blushed slightly, "But what shall I say?"  
  
She smiled knowingly; "Just tell her you want to talk to her." She winked and nudged him with her elbow.  
  
He blanched and blushed further. Turning Syaoran grasped Sakura's arm lightly, "Sakura, you should lie down you look a bit flushed." He said tersely, sometimes Tomoyo just knew too much for his own good!  
  
Meilin had been listening to the quiet conversation and exclaimed loudly, "I feel a bit faint too!!"  
  
"Oh no, you don't," Tomoyo grabbed her arm and dragged Meilin into the bathroom. Syaoran shook his head tiredly, as Meilin cried out, "But I don't want to stay here, I want to be with my fiancée!!"  
  
Sakura put her hand over Syaoran's, "She's still a little possessive."  
  
"Humph!" He sighed, and then blushed when he realise when that Sakura was squeezing his hand back. "Um, we should get into bed . . ."  
  
The door swished open. Touya stood there and narrowed a glare at Syaoran, "Gaki!"  
  
"I mean," Syaoran turned woodenly towards Sakura, "I mean . . . I should get YOU into bed." As Touya took another menacing step forward, Syaoran corrected himself one more time, "I should help you . . . go to bed . . . by yourself."  
  
Tomoyo poked her head out of the bathroom, "Touya-kun! I need your help."  
  
Touya narrowed his eyes into slits, sending a deadly but silent warning to the chocolate haired boy.  
  
When the door finally snapped shut, Syaoran expelled a deep sigh. "He really doesn't like me, does he?"  
  
"Might have something to do with the whole 'I'll get the Clow cards from you by force' thing . . ." Sakura adopted a big gruff voice, and jutted out her chin menacingly, she mimicked a terrible deep, stilted, Chinese accent, "Ah! Just as I thought! You have the Clow cards in you possession" She grimaced, and took a heavy step forward. She held her hand out demandingly, "Hand them over!"  
  
Syaoran folded his arms in slight annoyance, and then moved his hands to his pocket and started to tremble, "I can't! I promised Kero I would collect the cards!!" he squeaked in a high pitch voice, Sakura had only ever heard him talk like this when he was the princess for the class play. //That's not what I sounded like!!// She thought, //Well, then two can play at this game.// She continued to act out their encounter, "Keroberos? The beast of the seal?!" She looked away slightly and put her fist under her chin, "Why is he letting such a child capture the Clow cards?"  
  
Syaoran rolled his eyes, he didn't to that! Well if she could make stuff up then so could he! He scrunched up his shoulders and clasped his hands together helplessly, "Oh because Kero-chan doesn't have enough magic to be bigger . . . that's why!"  
  
"The symbol for Keroberos is the sun, it rules over 'fire' and 'earth'?" Sakura planted her fists against her hips and sneered at him, "You don't have either of them? How long have you been collecting them?"  
  
"Since April," Syaoran sniffed.  
  
"You've been searching for two months and you still haven't gotten them all?"  
  
Syaoran threw himself against the wall and wept, "That's right . . ." he looked at her and asked, "But why do you know of them?!"  
  
"That's none of your business!" Sakura snapped, "I'm going to collect them now, so hand over the ones you have!"  
  
He tightened his grasp on the pocket, "NO!"  
  
And with that he turned and ran into her bedroom, she stomped after him, making growling threatening noises. "Give them to me!"  
  
"No!"  
  
She pounced at him and they fell onto the bed, laughing. "GIVE THEM TO ME!!" She growled playfully.  
  
"All right! All right!!" Syaoran squeaked, and he pretended to hand her all to the cards, "I'll hand them over because oh, great Li Syaoran, you are the better of us, you should have all the cards, because you're so Masterful, handsome and strong, and I love you!"  
  
Sakura grinned, he was being funny, she pretended to take the cards, and then frowned deeply, like Syaoran. "I'm glad you see my point of view, but you should keep them, because not only am I handsome, strong and," Sakura snorted and allowed her mocked voice to drop even deeper, "Masterful . . . I am also the kindest, sweetest guy you will ever meet! And I'll help you catch the cards, even though I should be catching them for myself."  
  
Syaoran exaggerated his 'Sakura's' surprise, "Hoe! But why?"  
  
Sakura helped him to sit up, and cupped his face in her hand; she tried to force her eyebrows down further, trying to look more like Syaoran's 'scowlly' face. "Because I . . . she paused and decided to use her own voice, "Because I . . ."  
  
Syaoran suddenly realised it wasn't a game anymore, he too dropped his mimic. "Because you . . .?" he breathed.  
  
She sucked in a nervous breath and allowed her eyes to slid shut. When she opened them again, Syaoran's deep brown eyes stared into her emerald ones intensely.  
  
"Because I . . ."  
  
"Mistress," Yue called politely from out side the door, "Keroberos is awake."  
  
  
  
As a red faced Sakura blew past him, and then followed by a beetroot red but a disappointed Syaoran, Yue wasn't surprised. He'd actually walked into the room before hand, and saw that their moment of games had turned into something a bit more serious. He would have left them, but he felt the Mistress needed to know about Keroberos before Touya came in and disturbed them.  
  
  
  
"AHHHHH-PHOUF!!" Kero sneezed . . .  
  
. . .And Meilin happened to be sitting right in the wrong place. She raised her gooey hands up from the pool of snot that now resided in her lap, "Ewwww!"  
  
Sakura skidded to a halt and quickly paced into the room, "What happened to you Meilin?"  
  
Meilin shuddered, "Eeurgh! Cat snot!"  
  
"Come on . . . I'll get you clean in Sakura's room," Said Tomoyo, "Is it okay if she borrows some clothes, Sakura?"  
  
Sakura answered distractedly, "Yeah sure!" She returned her full attention to Keroberos, "Are you okay?"  
  
"I'mb cold!" He groaned, "Why amb I chitting in a bath fub of cold whater?"  
  
"You had a fever," Yue answered quietly, his moment of panic had past and now he was annoyed at himself for getting so emotional about it.  
  
"A febar?" Kero sat up quickly, which had the reverse effect of sloshing cold water all over Touya; he reached over and pushed the lion, "Hey watch it!"  
  
"I'mb phhhthick?! But I'mb Kewobewuss, gard-die-ann of bar phhhteal!" Kero sneezed again, "I can't get phhhthick!"  
  
Yue folded his arms and spat harshly, "Well . . . you have!"  
  
Kero blinked a couple of times. "Amb I going fuu die now?"  
  
Yue pressed his lips tightly together, and looked at Sakura. She shook her head, "Not if we can help it."  
  
"But I amb phhthick . . . wright?"  
  
"Yes," said Tomoyo as she sailed back into the room.  
  
Syaoran flinched, "How do you do that?"  
  
"Do what?"  
  
"Never mind."  
  
Tomoyo glanced at Sakura who shrugged, "Any way it about time we got you out of the bathtub, can you do it yourself or would you like us to help you?"  
  
"I'mb the gard-die-ann beshhfpt of bar phhhteal!!" Cried Kero indignantly as he hauled himself out of the tub, "I can jolly well help my-yy-yyyy. . ."  
  
Kero tipped out of the tub and fell heavily on the floor.  
  
"Keroberos!!" Cried Yue again. He clenched his fists and shook them close to his chest.  
  
"It's okay Yue, he just fainted," Tomoyo looked up at him, "Come on, I left Meilin in Sakura's bedroom to set up a makeshift bed."  
  
  
  
"Oooh!! That's it!! The lion goes on a diet!" Touya struggled as he hauled Kero into his sister's room,  
  
"Fat lot of good Yue is!" Groused Syaoran. The moon angel was in the bathroom still; Tomoyo was trying to calm him down.  
  
"Wellishegoingtodie?!" Yue demanded. "Ishe? Ishe?!"  
  
Tomoyo squinted at him, ever since Kero's second collapse Yue had been repeating the same thing over and over again, so far she had caught, 'wellish izzy gong two dye? Izzy? Izzy?'  
  
"Yue. Sit." She patted the edge of the tub, "Slow down, take a deep breathe. Good. Now say it again, only slower and in correct grammatical sentences."  
  
"Is he . . ." Yue bit his lip, " . . .going to die?"  
  
Tomoyo looked at the moon guardian with deep sympathy, but also in a new light. Who knew that the guardian harboured such a deep fear of death . . . or that he'd be so childish about it?  
  
"Not if we can help it."  
  
"You keep saying that!" Yue stood and started to pace, "Why can't you just say yes or no?" he stopped and grabbed her by the shoulders, "Is it because you know he is going to die?! Is he going to die?!"  
  
Touya came back into the room, "Tomoyo? Sakura wants to know what you want to do now."  
  
Tomoyo looked at Yue then at Touya, "Yes, okay, could you--?"  
  
"Sure."  
  
She nodded her thanks and went to answer Sakura.  
  
Yue bit his lip again and shook his arms down by his sides. He paced around the tiny room nervously. Ever so often he'd pause to rearrange some bottles or tidied up some of sloshed water. He folded, unfold the same towel three times, and then put it on the shelf.  
  
Touya leant against the rim of sink and watched him quietly. The guardian was genuinely petrified of losing his . . . Touya frowned, "Is Keroberos your brother?"  
  
Yue picked up another towel, and folded, then unfolded, then folded it again, looking like he hadn't heard. Touya knew he had heard, in the time he had knew the guardian, Touya had found the winged being never missed a thing. He pushed himself away from the sink and took the towel away from the guardian. Yue still refused to meet his gaze.  
  
"Is Keroberos your brother, or do you two just think of each other as Cl- ow's-"  
  
"Clow!" Snapped Yue, "His name is pronounced *Clow*! Do not *call* him as if he were some sort of cow!"  
  
Touya smiled, that had done it. "Well, at least you were listening to me."  
  
Yue looked away again. After a few moments, he nodded, "Clow always insisted on us being a family. He'd refer to Keroberos and I as his 'sons', we always referred to each other as 'brother'."  
  
Touya glanced down and absorbed this, "Are you the older or the younger-"  
  
"Older, about a year."  
  
"Not much then . . ."  
  
"Perhaps, from your point of view." Yue turned away and straightened a picture on the wall, "But we're beings of magic, and we grew much fast than you humans do, in human years I had the physical and mental age of a five year old when Clow created Keroberos."  
  
"I was seven when my sister was born," Touya stated, he hoped to get Yue's mind off the idea of his brother dying.  
  
"I know," Yue snapped over his shoulder, "I *can* do basic mathematics."  
  
Touya stepped forward and pressed his hands on Yue's shoulders, "It's okay . . . we're going to do everything we can, and your brother will be okay."  
  
Yue breathe in deeply, and his shoulders tensed. He looked down, "Thank you."  
  
Touya smiled slightly, "It's all right." He turned Yue in his arms, the guardian still looked down. He was still biting his lip. "Now, stop biting your lip," commanded Touya quietly, "You'll hurt yourself."  
  
Yue complied without argument, and looked up at Touya. The taller man blinked in surprise, Yue looked just like Yuki, only with a sadder expression. Touya had never seen that before, Yue's head dipped and the guardian shuffled closer. Touya wrapped himself around the frightened angel, and rested his chin on the silken mop of brilliant white hair.  
  
"Thank you," murmured Yue into his chest.  
  
  
  
Meilin looked bright orange shirt Tomoyo had given her, she tugged at the tight neck, with it's little gold wing. Orange was not her colour she decided.  
  
"What are we going to do when your father returns?" She said looking up at Sakura.  
  
"He's gone to the mainland, he'll be gone for two or three weeks," she murmured. Sakura was stroking Kero's fur as he slept. His breaths were short and panted, and his fever had returned. Tomoyo had decided that might be more harmful than good if they bathed him again. "We'll wait it out," she had said.  
  
"That should be enough for the cold to clear away." Said Tomoyo quietly as she folded another pillow under Kero's paws. "If it's really serious it will last longer."  
  
Sakura's heart sank, //If it's really serious . . . will he die? // she swallowed, the shock was swiftly being replaced with fear. Tears welled up, and started to fall softly.  
  
"Keroberos." She whispered.  
  
With Tomoyo and Syaoran making Kero comfortable, Meilin shuffled around to the weeping card Mistress.  
  
"We're here, he'll be fine." And with that, she wrapped her arms about Sakura's frail frame. The card Mistress sobbed, getting the shirt Meilin was wearing wet.  
  
//Oh well . . .// thought Meilin, //At least I'll be able to change out of this awful colour soon, if she keeps it up . . .//  
  
  
  
"Master? What's wrong?"  
  
Eriol was staring deeply at his meal, and hadn't said a word since they had gotten home. Ruby and Spinel exchanged a look, and Ruby tried again, "Master?"  
  
Eriol pushed away from the table, and left his cooling meal behind him. He walked into the library and stared out the window. Ruby and Spinel trailed him, "Master?" Tried Spinel, "Is there something wrong?"  
  
Eriol started to nod slowly, "There is . . ."  
  
"What is it?" asked Ruby.  
  
Eriol turned from the window, he looked very serious, and his child-like face was drawn in a worried frown.  
  
"I don't know."  
  
  
  
It was getting late. Sakura had finally fallen asleep, Meilin and Tomoyo had retreated downstairs to make something for the group to eat.  
  
"Do you really think it's so serious that he might die?" Asked Meilin quietly, she looked down into her bowl of batter.  
  
Tomoyo slowly cut some vegetables, "Maybe." She answered softly.  
  
"What happens if that happens? I mean . . ." Meilin stopped her stirring and looked at Tomoyo, "He's the guardian of the seal . . . what will happen to the cards if he goes?"  
  
"I'm more concerned about Yue-san." Tomoyo stopped her slicing; "I don't think he could honestly handle Kero dying."  
  
Meilin's eyes widened, "You think he might-"  
  
"Let's just say, his state of mind isn't exactly balanced right now." Tomoyo resumed her slicing. Meilin slowly started to stir and pondered the questions raised.  
  
"If both of them die . . . what will happen to Sakura?"  
  
"I don't know . . ." Tomoyo turned away, and dropped her vegetables into the boiling water, she made sure that Meilin couldn't see her wipe her tears away, //If both die, it would be a serious drain on Sakura . . .// she thought fearfully, //she barely managed to transform the Sakura cards . . . would she survive making new guardians? //  
  
"I just don't know . . ."  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
And now it's time for LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
DrM: Konnichiwa!! [Throws herself at the readers' feet] I'm so sorry!! Gomen! Gomen!  
  
Yue: So you should be!  
  
DrM: I promise this will get funnier . . . it will!! I promise! I just want to establish some character arches . . . I promise the humour will start within the next few chapters until then please be kind and review, and don't flame me! I didn't mean for this to get so serious . . . Gomen!! It just kinda wants to go in this direction for now . . .  
  
Yue: What do you mean 'go in this direction for now'?  
  
DrM: When a story chooses it wants to go one way you go with it . . . NEVER ignore the story's wishes!  
  
Yue: How about my wishes? Huh? Ever thought about that? I don't want to be some sort of screwball!  
  
DrM: But you make such a traumatised cute screwball bunny-wunny!  
  
Yue: [sighs] People . . . this is what I want you to do . . . see that little yellow button down there? Good, click it, and leave message saying . . . 'That drop dead sexy moon guardian is NOT a traumatised cute screwball bunny- [face screws up in disgust,] -wunny! . . . then you can write what you think of the story and then I suggest you run away. . . RUN FAR AWAY!!  
  
DrM: My, my, then I guess a certain moon guardian *doesn't* want to have more action with a certain moon angel's mistress' brother . . .  
  
Yue: On second thought, just leave a nice review. . . preferably saying. . . 'That traumatised cute screwball bunny-wunny drop dead sexy moon guardian needs action with Touya . . . Lots of action!' then leave some sort of comment . . .  
  
DrM: I don't even know what to say . . . the man's just so cute! Don't forget to R&R!! Honn na na!! 


	4. I’ve got the beginnings of a headache . ...

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be!  
  
Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make!  
  
Also disclaimers for 'When I'm sixty four' by the Beatles, Rest In Peace, George!!  
  
  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
  
  
Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat.  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
  
  
Part four - I've got the beginnings of a headache . . .  
  
[Getting there! Funnier. Next few chapters . . . PROMISE!! ALSO a warning about LANGUAGE: there's just a tiny bit of swearing in here . . . I promise the culprits had their mouths washed out with soap!!]  
  
  
  
  
  
Meanwhile upstairs . . .  
  
"Hey? Stuffed animal."  
  
Syaoran's shoulders drooped, that always elicited some kind of response from Kero. He pressed a damp cloth against the lion's forehead. He noticed that the fur nearer the helmet Kero was wearing was sweating more profusely. While his nimble fingers worked on getting the clasp undone he thought back to the first time that they had met . . .  
  
  
  
"I was just to explain that!"  
  
Syaoran ignored the tinny voice behind him, the thunder beast was wounded and reorienting itself, Syaoran was concentrating on it when he noticed Sakura was pulling out the Windy.  
  
"Baka!" He proceeded to reprimand her for being so dense as to use the windy against the thunder beast.  
  
The tinny voice sounded again, "I've been in western Japan long enough . . ." it groused, "I can forgive 'idiot' . . . but I can't forgive 'Baka'!" It growled.  
  
He still ignored it, concentrated as he was on the battle. The battle . . . Syaoran smiled fondly, the battle was their first together. He had beaten the thunder beast back with his trained control over the forces of the wind.  
  
"Petals of the wind, answer my call!!"  
  
Once Sakura had caught it with the shadow card, he joined her on the courtyard. Just as he was criticizing her for not know how to catch the card correctly a tiny, fluffy stuffed toy appeared beside her.  
  
"Hey, don't ask for the impossible!" It yelled at him, "it hasn't been long since Sakura started to collect the cards!!"  
  
"What the hell is this?" Li pointed at it with distain.  
  
Sakura clearly hurt by his earlier words murmured, "Kero-chan. . ."  
  
"NANI?!" That had surprised him; "this is Keroberos, beast of the seal? The strongest guardian beast with the golden eyes?"  
  
He had raised his finger to point at the floating guardian in front of him, ". . . is this plush toy?!"  
  
It was for that remark Li Syaoran received his first ever bitten finger . . .  
  
  
  
. . . Syaoran lowered the helmet from Keroberos' head, and worked on the lower half of the armour.  
  
"You can't leave her like this." He said softly, "She needs you. The cards need you." He shook his head and smiled slightly, "This whole business would never have been any fun without you."  
  
The clasp for the lower half sprung open and he pulled it off easily. Syaoran stood and placed the two pieces of body armour on the desk, the scarlet jewels glinted in the moonlight. Syaoran frowned, and turned back to Keroberos.  
  
The lion was now huddled up, lying on his side. Pillows bedded his head and paws; Touya had provided a long couch pillow to rest his back against. Picking up the damp cloth, Syaoran resumed pressing the damp cloth against Kero's forehead. He glanced up and looked at Sakura.  
  
She was lying on the very edge of the bed, one pale arm had fallen off the bed and her face was contorted with the look of nightmares.  
  
Syaoran's frown grew deeper.  
  
"You can't leave her like this or I'll . . ." he repeated. "I'll never forgive you, stuffed animal."  
  
  
  
Tomoyo knelt beside Yue; she put the steaming bowl beside him.  
  
"At least try to eat."  
  
The guardian buried his head deeper into his knees and muttered, "I'm not hungry."  
  
Touya sat up slightly from the couch, "Yue. . . at least have something-"  
  
He was interrupted by Yue's sudden transformation.  
  
"What's happened?" Yukito looked around at the surprised but otherwise sombre expressions, "Did something happen? Is Sakura all right?"  
  
Touya nodded, "The kaijuu is fine . . . it's Keroberos. He's a bit ill."  
  
A flash of pain suddenly hit Yukito, he felt a bit nauseous, and his head began to swim. Touya press his hand against Yuki's back, to support him. Yukito's head cleared. "Yue . . . we're so weak . . ."  
  
Tomoyo picked up the bowl of stew, here. "Eat."  
  
Yukito felt better after about three or four bowls of the filling stew. The group were very quiet as they ate. "Where is Sakura-chan?"  
  
"Sleeping," Touya murmured.  
  
Yuki was quiet for a moment, "How is she taking this?"  
  
"She's very worried," answered Tomoyo; "I think it's only just sinking in how serious this is."  
  
Yukito nodded, "I can feel Yue's concern . . . he isn't taking this so well, is he?"  
  
Meilin looked up, the weariness of the last few hours showed in her reddish- amber eyes, "He thinks Keroberos is going to die."  
  
"Is he?"  
  
The group left the question in the air, and returned to their meal. When Syaoran descended the steps, he was carrying Kero's body armour. "Where shall I put these?" He asked no one in particular, "I took them off, and he appears to be breathing a bit more easily now."  
  
Touya stood and took them, "I'll put them in the washroom, and they'll need to be cleaned before we put them back on him."  
  
Yukito stood and took the upper half of the armour from Touya, "I lend you a hand."  
  
  
  
As they walked quietly into the washroom, Yuki waited until both pieces had been carefully put away, before he stepped in front of Touya.  
  
"How bad is it?" Yukito asked, ". . .Really?"  
  
"He's unconscious, he has a hot fever that keeps dipping and rising . . ." Touya rubbed his eyes, "He might just have a cold, maybe the flu, but we don't know what to do about it because neither Keroberos or Yue has ever gotten sick before . . ."  
  
"Why is Yue so scared?" Yukito pressed, "Do you know why?"  
  
Touya pressed his lips together; "Keroberos has the same symptoms . . . as Clow Reed." Yuki looked at him with non-comprehension, Touya's head dipped, he was tired and he was also beginning to give into the fear that was striking the rest, ". . . as when Clow Reed died."  
  
Yuki's pale face grew impossibly whiter with his shock, then his amber eyes creased in sympathy.  
  
"Yue's scared because . . ." Touya continued, ". . .Because he's terrified . . . history will repeat itself and claim the only remaining member of his family . . ."  
  
  
  
The night continued, and the group failed to sleep at all. Midnight came and passed, and the early hours passed just as slowly, Touya stood in the kitchen washing the few pots that the group had been using. As he scrubbed the pans clean he thought about the night. He frowned, and pressed the heel of his palm against his forehead, he felt a headache coming on . . .  
  
Syaoran walked into the kitchen, "Have you got any aspirin?"  
  
Touya turned, "Why?" He winced, the headache was getting closer.  
  
"I've got the beginnings of a headache . . ." Syaoran explained, and then winced, as it got stronger and stronger.  
  
"You too?"  
  
Yukito and Sakura both ran in from the living room.  
  
"I've got such a headache!" Said Yuki, "It's even woken up Yue!"  
  
Sakura clutched her head and wail, "Oooowwww!! It hurts worse than when I hit my head with my baton!"  
  
"Okay, now it's officially strange!" Touya stated, "The four of us have the magical senses around here and we've all got headaches . . . can anyone explain?"  
  
The four looked at each other, then Touya's, Sakura's and Syaoran' eyes settled on Yukito as he appeared to be listening to Yue. Yukito winced, "Yue's not any help, mentally . . ." Yukito strained for the right metaphor, "Mentally; he's effectively buried his head under a pillow . . ." Yuki listened some more to his other half, and "He's swearing his head off . . . he's not making much sense . . ."  
  
"Aside from swearing," Touya pressed the heel of his palm against his head, "What is he saying?"  
  
"Something about a stupid cow . . . Doesn't realise that we're too tired to cope with . . . Bloody bright aura . . ."  
  
"Can we talk to him quickly?" Asked Sakura, when Yuki gingerly nodded; she commanded, "Yue, I wish to speak with thou."  
  
Yukito grimaced, and then his face cleared briefly as Yue's personality asserted it's self, Yukito's eyes narrowed into a deep frown as Yue stared at his mistress. He was about to ask her what she wanted when a tapping caught Yue's attention, he looked up and stare at the window. Yukito's amber eyes narrowed even more. "Bollocks!" He swore.  
  
"Hey!" Chaste Touya, he didn't want his sister to hear such language.  
  
Syaoran ignored Touya and looked out the window, "Oh, Bloody Hell!" He groaned.  
  
"What is it with you two?" Touya growled as he turned to look out the window. He rolled his eyes and sighed sharply, "Oh shit!"  
  
Sakura shook her head slightly at the language, and went to open the patio door, "Konbanwa Eriol-kun . . .  
  
Oh! You brought ruby moon and Spinel with you!"  
  
Eriol nodded as much as his large hat would allow, "Indeed . . ." he paused and searched her face worried; his lavender grey eyes were racked with concern.  
  
"Nani?" Asked Sakura worriedly.  
  
Eriol bit the corner of his lower lip, and remained silent. Ruby lent forward and said jokingly, "The master seems to think something's wrong, so we dragged him over to prove there was nothing wrong, and we were wondering is anything wrong?"  
  
Before Sakura could answer, Spinel pushed ruby out of the way, "What my dear demented sister actually means is; is there something wrong with one of your guardians? . . . *Clow* appears to be worried . . ." he paused as his eyes settled on Yukito, "Yue. . ." he whispered threateningly.  
  
"Spinel . . ." Yukito's eyes narrowed on the large panther, he raised his hand and flicked his hand under his chin.  
  
At the sight of this motion, Spinel appeared to take offence, he gasped, and then he deliberately mocked Yue's name. "Yu-way."  
  
"Spinner." Yue mimicked Spinel's tone.  
  
"Yu-way!"  
  
"Spinner!"  
  
Eriol put his hand up to stop the nonsense, he sighed, "Is there . . .?" He began.  
  
Sakura nodded wearily, her headache was much stronger now. She pressed her hand against her forehead, "It's Kero . . . he has a fever."  
  
Eriol was silent for a few moments as he took this in, he glanced up at Yue, who held his gaze for a few moments then looked away. Eriol's shoulders slumped. He nodded slowly and turned away. He paused in the garden and stared at the night's sky.  
  
Spinel and Ruby observed his behaviour, and then looked at each other. "Is there something that we don't know about going on?" Asked ruby, pushing past Spinel to enter the kitchen. The headaches got immediately worse.  
  
"Ruby! Return to your bloody false form!" Roared Yue through Yukito's voice, he was literally trembling with rage, "Your true form's aura is entirely *too* bloody bright!"  
  
Ruby's mouth fell open at Yue's loss of control, "Well; it's never bothered anyone before!" She screamed back at him.  
  
"Now it is!" he snapped loudly. "Do it!"  
  
"No!" she folded her arms obstinately.  
  
Eriol stepped into the kitchen, "Silence!" He opened his hand and his magic staff appeared instantly. "Ruby Moon! Return to thy false form this instant." When she didn't comply, he barked, "Either return or be sealed in the book!" He rammed his staff on the floor to make his point heard.  
  
She blinked briefly at him with complete surprise; first Yue's loss of control and now Eriol had lost his temper. "Yes, master," she said meekly as she quickly returned to her false appearance. Touya, Sakura and Syaoran sighed in relief as they felt their headaches receding. Spinel looked up at his master, Eriol's hand was much whiter as it gripped the golden staff tightly. His jaw was held tightly as he turned his attention on Yue, "Yue!" He barked, "Go. To. Sleep."  
  
Yue was still trembling; he looked from Eriol, to Sakura, "Mistress?" He said, obviously trying to contain his anger, "Do you still require my presence?"  
  
Sakura shook her head silently.  
  
"Very well." And with that, Yukito instantly returned, "Ow!" He moved over to the table and sat down. Yukito clutch his head and murmured, "I'm so tired."  
  
Touya moved over towards him, "Come on, let's get you to bed."  
  
As the two moved out of the room, Syaoran cast one tired but threatening glance at Eriol, silently warning him not to try any funny business. Eriol glared at him, "This isn't the time, descendant!" He snapped. "Take my guardians into the other room."  
  
"Master?" Asked Nakura, "What's going on?"  
  
Eriol ignored her, and continued to glare at Syaoran, "Now!" He growled through his teeth.  
  
When Syaoran and the two guardians had left the room, Eriol turned to Sakura. The sight that greeted him dissipated his rage instantly. Sakura was leaning heavily on the counter behind her; she had wrapped her arms around her arms. He could see now that she was pale, which, coupled with her stance, made her look more frail than usual.  
  
Eriol closed his eyes and turned his staff back to a key with a few quiet words. He moved over to table and drew one of the seats out. Eriol sighed as he sat, "So . . . Yue *has* told you."  
  
Sakura nodded, tearfully, she glanced once out the window, and then pushed herself away from the counter. She sat opposite the dark haired boy. She drew in one sorrowful breath, before she said quietly, "Clow died of a fever?"  
  
"No. . ." Eriol couldn't quite meet her eyes, he chose instead to lean back and speak to the table, "I died because I wished to."  
  
"Did you tell them that was why?"  
  
"No. I didn't want them to think I was leaving them . . ." Eriol sounded weary, " . . . on purpose . . . so I allowed the illness to take me."  
  
"So you let them think you died of a sickness, and now Kero's sick, Yue thinks the same thing's going to happen again." Sakura continued to stare at him, as he leant forward, put his elbows on the table and pressed his hands over his face. His voice was muffled, as it passed through his hands.  
  
"It never occurred to me that they might get sick . . ." he said, "Why didn't I foresee this?"  
  
Sakura stood and walked around the table to the reincarnation, she looked down on him. Tears filled her eyes; she raised a trembling hand to his shoulder, "Is he going to die?"  
  
Eriol moved his hands from his face and looked at her, he stood, and walked away from her to the door.  
  
"Hiirawagizawa! . . ." she called after him, still he didn't turn, ". . .Reed!"  
  
He stopped at the sound of his former life's name. "Ruby Moon, Spinel Sun! We're leaving!" He called with his back still to her. His guardians quietly entered the room, Spinel cast one look at Sakura, his midnight blue eyes showed that they had been told, as he passed her wordlessly, Nakura placed a hand on Sakura's shoulder. The false form of Ruby opened and closed her mouth silently; she couldn't find the words. Her tear-filled eyes were full of true fear. She looked down and quickly walked away to stand by her master.  
  
"Hiirawagizawa Eriol . . . or Clow Reed . . ." Sakura cried, her voice cracking, " . . .Answer me!"  
  
Eriol turned slightly, his jaw was clenched tightly, his face crumpled as the tears ran freely down his face. "I . . ." he stopped and shook his head, " . . . We don't know . . ." he walked towards her, he grasped her hands in his, as he spoke quietly, "I will study my books, if he doesn't wake within the next ten days, you must call me. . ."  
  
And with that, the reincarnation signalled his guardians, and left.  
  
  
  
Five days later, there was no change in Keroberos' condition, Meilin, Syaoran and Tomoyo stayed over. Sakura grew paler and more tired as she stayed for hours beside Kero's bedside; she wanted to be there when he awoke. But as the hours dragged by, it became increasingly clear that he wasn't going to wake up anytime soon. Ever so often Meilin would check in on her and find her crying; the Chinese girl, despite her constant barbs, would always comfort Sakura. Tomoyo tried to keep her calm, knowing that Sakura would not benefit from seeing her friend give into the real fears she was being to gather, not only about Kero and Sakura but Yue as well.  
  
Tomoyo had pulled Touya aside after two days and asked him to keep a close eye on Yue. The instruction was unnecessary, not only would Touya not let Yue or Yuki out of his sight, but also Yue rarely appeared. The moon angel was either completely silent when he did appear, or answered in single syllables. After the third day, he would only appear if Sakura called him and even then only stay for a matter of minutes to assure her of his existence.  
  
Touya had caught him once on the fifth night, sitting by his brother. Yue was sitting crossed legged; he tucked the blanket tighter, and fluffed the pillows. Touya stood in the doorway, not willing to disturb Yue; it was obvious that he needed sometime alone. He strained to hear the words of the song Yue was singing. The song was familiar, and he had heard his father singing it a few times before.  
  
"When I get older, losing my hair," Yue's voice quivered, as he ran his fingers through the short fur on top of Kero's head, "Many years from now. Will you still be sending me a Valentine?"  
  
Touya smiled as the name of the band came to mind, a British band called 'the Beatles', "Birthday greetings, bottle of wine. If I'd been out till quarter to three . . ." Yue's voice dropped to a softer tone as he stretched out beside his brother. "Would you lock the door?" Yue smiled, evidently this was a favourite of Kero's "Will you still need me, will you still feed me," Yue swallowed, and sucked in a tearful breathe, he whispered ". . .When I'm sixty-four . . ."  
  
He stopped the song and closed his eyes, the cheerful song dying on his lips. Touya moved quietly into the room and crouched by Yue. The moon angel was now fast asleep, clutching the edge of the blanket. Touya sighed, and pulled another spare blanket over Yue.  
  
  
  
When Tomoyo woke on the sixth day, it was very early. Meilin and Syaoran slept closely together, and Tomoyo put that down to the years they must have spent together as children. Tomoyo rolled her sleeping bag and tied it tightly. She walked down the corridor to the downstairs bathroom and prepared herself for the new day.  
  
She was tying the last hair band around her ponytail as she padded softly out of the room; her hair had been in tight plaits or ponytails for the last few days. She wasn't so overtly concerned with it at the moment, as long as it was out of her way, she could deal with the day.  
  
Tomoyo sighed, and paused in the hallway and glanced up the stairs. Her mind casting itself back to the many memories she had of being here, like the time she had walked in to find Sakura and Kero-chan binded by the woody, //or perhaps// she remembered with a smile, //the time Rika-chan was taken by the sword card and the first thing Kero could complain about was how we were having cake and we didn't think to tell him//  
  
With this happy memory buoying her, she moved into the kitchen to prepare breakfast. Tomoyo yawned and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. //Maybe I should make a nice breakfast, that'll cheer Sakura-chan---  
  
"Whoa!!" She screamed as she faltered and fell.  
  
Meilin and Syaoran were at the kitchen door instantly. "What happened?!" Demanded Meilin, "Are you okay?!"  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine, I just tripped . . . over . . . KEROBEROS?!"  
  
  
  
Once the rest of the household had been roused, the group gathered around the sleeping form of Keroberos. "What's he doing down here?" Muttered Syaoran incredulously.  
  
Touya turned to Yukito, "Did Yue bring him down?"  
  
Yuki's eyes crossed slightly, his jaw becoming slightly slack. After a few moments he blinked and became aware again, ". . . No," he answered, "He fell asleep by Kero, but other than that he hasn't had any contact."  
  
Sakura crouched beside the dozing guardian, she followed the line of his body . . . the way his paws were extended. She grinned then started to chuckle as she realised why Keroberos was down here.  
  
"What's so funny?!" Snapped Yukito uncharacteristically.  
  
Even Tomoyo jumped in surprise as Yue's tone came ringing through Yuki's voice. After Sakura got over her surprise, she pointed in the direction of Kero grasping paws. As the snoozing guardian snored away, Sakura began to giggle even more. The rest of the group caught on quickly, even Touya snorted with laughter. The fridge door was open slightly, and a pudding was splattered on the floor, evidently Kero had passed out before he could eat the jellied treat.  
  
"I told you he'd wake up for a pudding!" Laughed Meilin, she turned to Yuki, "See Yue? The sponge toy will be fine!!"  
  
Syaoran and Touya leant over to pick up the sleeping lion, and Sakura wiped the sleep, and possibly tears of joy, from her eyes, "The one thing Kero could never resist!"  
  
Tomoyo smiled, "It's nice to see you smiling again, Sakura-chan."  
  
Sakura blinked, "Hoe?" The honey coloured haired girl grinned and jumped up. As her brother and Syaoran struggled to lift Kero back up the stairs, she pranced after them delightedly. "Kero-chan, Kero-chan," she sang. Meilin quickly followed and Tomoyo and Yukito stood alone in the kitchen.  
  
"I wonder when he came down . . ." Asked Yukito, as Tomoyo turned to the fridge. She retrieved some eggs to prepare some omelettes and turned to find Yue standing in Yukito's place, " . . .Probably very early" he said answering his own other form's question.  
  
He folded his arms and shook his head. Tomoyo smiled as the version of Yue she was used to seeing resumed his place by the window. As she approached the cooker, she was surprised to notice he was leaning against the counter. She glanced at him, his catlike eyes were closed and he looked very tired, he was breathing deeply. "Yue-san?" She questioned quietly, "Would you like something . . .?"  
  
The question died on her lips as she realised the tall moon guardian had fallen asleep. Tomoyo smiled and quickly rushed into the living room. She bumped into Meilin on her way back to kitchen.  
  
"What's going on?" Meilin asked her, Tomoyo paused for all of three seconds to shush her and continued on to the kitchen. Meilin followed and found the purple haired girl snapping pictures of Yue, "What are you doing?" Meilin asked loudly.  
  
"Shush!" Tomoyo pushed her finger against her lips, "He's asleep!" She whispered excitedly, "Isn't it simply kawaii?!"  
  
Meilin's mouth fell open, she'd never seen the guardian asleep before, and he looked exactly as he normally did, arms folded, face set in a slight distaining frown. "Woooooow!" Said Meilin.  
  
  
  
"Kero-chan's going to be fine!" Sang Sakura, she may have been in her early teens, but she still retained her complete genki-Sakura-ness. Touya smiled slightly, it pleased him to see his sister happy again.  
  
"Yep, and as soon as he gets better . . ." Touya snapped playfully. "We're putting him on a diet! He weighs a ton!"  
  
"Kero . . ." murmured a deep rumbling voice sleepily. "No . . . diet . . ."  
  
"Kero?!" Sakura dropped to her knees by the lion, as he rolled over in his sleep. His wings disappeared as he rolled onto his back, and his golden eyes creaked open. "You'll be older too . . ." he murmured, "And if you say the word," he giggled nonsensically, "I could stay with you."  
  
"What?" Sakura frowned slightly, "What do you mean?"  
  
Kero yawned and fell back asleep. "I could be handy," he muttered then giggled, "Mending a fuse"  
  
"He's delirious." Said Syaoran. "What on earth is he talking about mending a fuse?"  
  
"I think I know," Touya stood and paced over to the door, "YUE!"  
  
  
  
"YUE!" Touya's voice rang all the way downstairs and the moon guardian's eyes instantly snapped awake, he glanced around, cleared his throat quietly and strolled out of the kitchen, sliding the door shut behind him.  
  
Tomoyo and Meilin shrugged and turned to make breakfast.  
  
Meanwhile, Yue flew up the stairs as fast as he could . . . only to come skidding to a halt outside his mistress' bedroom and strolled coolly into the room, as if he was paying Touya some kind of generosity for even responding to the call.  
  
"You bellowed"? He peered contemptuously at Touya.  
  
Sakura looked up, "Kero was awake!"  
  
"Why didn't you call me sooner?" Yue instantly dropped to his brother' side.  
  
"He was saying some thing about mending fuses? Do you know what that means?"  
  
A tiny, tiny, (and I mean) tiny smile formed on the silver lips, and was quickly squashed. "They're lyrics from Keroberos' favourite song . . ."  
  
"Oh?" Asked Sakura, she'd never heard Kero sing anything to do with fuses.  
  
"The Book . . ." Yue looked at Kero, ". . . Was taken to England by one of Clow's chosen messengers from Osaka."  
  
"Chosen messengers?"  
  
"It's a long process, involves telepathy and other such stuff," Yue waved his hand as if it wasn't that important. "In order for your father to collect the book, and bring it back here to Japan." He glanced up at Sakura, "No coincidences remember?"  
  
Sakura blinked, and nodded her understanding. Syaoran frowned, "But what does this have to do with Kero's favourite song about fuses?"  
  
"We were left in England during the sixties . . . the Beatles were all the rage . . ." Yue leaned over to stroke Kero's fur, as he continued, "Yukito loved it. He was so at home with the hippies"  
  
Touya gaped at him in surprise; "Yuki was around in the sixties?"  
  
"Not as Tsukishiro Yukito, but as . . ." Yue trailed off as he tried to remember the name, "Oh, yeah, Julian Star . . ."  
  
"Julian Star?" Said Sakura, "Why--?"  
  
"British names are hard to come up with, especially since-"  
  
A cough from Kero interrupted the conversation, "When your lights have gone." Kero sat up slightly and looked dully at Yue. "I believe it's your line . . ." he murmured. Yue hesitated as the other looked at him expectantly. He really didn't want to, not in front of his mistress, but Kero was looking at him with hazy eyes and it was clear the lion was only remaining awake to her the next part of the verse. Yue sighed, and began to sing softly, "You can knit a sweater by the fireside, Sunday morning go for a ride,"  
  
Kero smiled, his wing grew out again and he propped himself up with them, Touya gave him a little help, not trusting the fluffy feathers to hold out against the lion's weight. "Doing the garden, digging the weeds," Yue continued as he began to sing louder, forgetting the audience he had and solely concentrating on Kero, "Who could ask for more."  
  
Kero grinned lopsidedly, as he joined in, "Will you still need me, will you still feed me. . . when I'm. . ." he sneezed and Yue put his arms around the heavy lion, Kero leaned his nuzzle against Yue's chest as he murmured, "When I'm sixty-four. . ." Yue shuffled slowly along to lower his brother back onto the bed. Kero snorted with light laughter as sleep came again, "Yue . . ." Kero smiled, he whispered quietly just for Yue's hearing, "Cheer up. . ."  
  
Yue frowned slightly, and replied in the same tone, "What do you mean?"  
  
Kero chuckled one more time dozily, "Now who's making the mistress worried?"  
  
Touya motioned to Syaoran silently, and the two got up and left the mistress and her guardians alone for a few moments.  
  
  
  
Tomoyo smiled as she set the table, she looked up to see Meilin enter the room with Touya and Syaoran.  
  
"And Yue did what?" Meilin asked  
  
Syaoran shook his head in amazement, "Yue was singing to him!"  
  
"Seriously?"  
  
"Yeah." Syaoran confirmed, "And then Kero joined in. . ."  
  
"The sponge toy can sing?!"  
  
Tomoyo smiled more at the strange exchange, "How is he?"  
  
"HE'S GOING TO BE FINE!!" Sakura squealed as she ran into the room, "Oh Tomoyo!! He's going to be fine!!"  
  
The teenaged girl threw her arms around Tomoyo and the two danced in the room. Sakura stopped briefly and turned to Meilin and pulled her into the dance as well, the three girls giggled happily, as Sakura continued to jump up and yell, "Kero's going to fine!! He's going to be great! He's going to fine!"  
  
Tomoyo broke out of the dance to grab her video camera, "It's so nice to see you happy again Sakura! I was so worried, but now I see everything's going to be okay."  
  
Sakura stopped spinning and staggered; Syaoran caught her, "Careful!"  
  
Sakura turned to grin at him, and Syaoran was nearly blinded by the sunshine that his cherry blossom sent through her smile. He smiled brightly back at her.  
  
Touya shook his head, even he couldn't suppress the joy he felt at the sight of his sister happy. A light lilac aura behind him flashed, and then was replaced by a bright snow coloured one. "Hello Yuki." Touya said as he turned.  
  
Yukito smiled, "Everything's okay now, isn't it?" He said quietly.  
  
Touya smiled, his deep blue eyes twinkled lightly under the chocolate mop of hair. "My sister is happy again," he said so only Yuki could hear, and then louder he said, "The kaijuu is celebrating!"  
  
He closed his eyes to prepare for the instant stab of pain that Sakura was inevitably going to bestow upon him. When none came, he opened his eyes. The pink aura of his sister glowed strongly behind him, he turn to see she was just looking up at him. Her eyes were brimming tears of joy, which she wipe away before saying, "Simply because Kero-chan is going to be fine," she announced grandly, "I shall forgive you!"  
  
Touya frowned theatrically, "Eh-? Yuki . . ." he looked over his shoulder to his friend, he pulled his face into a disappointed frown, "It's going to rain!"  
  
Yuki laughed and moved past him, he patted Sakura on the head. When he was standing behind her, he placed his hands on her shoulders. Sakura turned and hugged the snow bunny tightly. Yuki brushed his hands over her honey coloured hair, smiled and then looked up over his glasses. Touya blinked twice before he realised what he was seeing wasn't a mirage, Yukito's eyes was now a sparkling violet. //Yue's eye colour in Yuki's eyes?!// Touya thought. He nodded slightly, enough to alert Yue/Yukito that he comprehended the significance. A smile formed on Yuki's lips to show that the split being knew Touya understood the message that he was sending.  
  
Yue had taken Kero's message to heart, and even though he wasn't about to further spoil his reputation as the ice-cold moon guardian, he would show his happiness through his other form, Yukito.  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
And now it's time for LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
DrM: Konnichiwa!! I thought I'd get this next bit out now because that last one was a little sad . . . and I want to assure you that I haven't and won't be killing Kero in this ficcy . . . [Laughs evilly] I've already done that once . . . and even then I couldn't leave him dead . . . it's called 'Let me tell you a story'  
  
Yue: [puts on a red balaclava and starts flashing] WARNING! WARNING!! STORY PLUG!! STORY PLUG ALERT!!  
  
Real Yue: who the hell are you?  
  
Fake Yue: [still flashing] STORY PLUG ALERT!!  
  
Real Yue: I said who the hell . . . aw, to hell with it! [Gets lots of dynamite and blows up the fake Yue!]  
  
DrM: Hey! I was enjoying that! [Sighs] he's such a mean co-host! . . . Cute though! Anyway, please R&R! And thank you for all the really nice reviews I've been getting lately; they're cheering me up a real treat!! 


	5. I’m not related to a toaster . . . am I?

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be!  
  
Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
  
  
Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat.  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
  
  
Part 5 - I'm not related to a toaster . . . am I?  
  
  
  
The next few days Kero was either in a deep slumber or he would be barely conscious. This may have been the only contact any of them had with the lion, but for Sakura and Yue; it appeared to be enough. Sakura returned to full force, she was no longer pallid and ran about the place like usual, Tomoyo (of course) began to film her every movement. Except when she was with Syaoran, Tomoyo still wanted the handsome Chinese boy to admit his feeling to her best friend. Meilin wasn't as possessive over Syaoran as she had been acting, in fact she was very ready to give Syaoran a push in the right direction, even though sometimes it felt more like they were pulling the stubborn boy to the inevitable!  
  
Yukito and Touya were just content to look after the younger teens, and were thankful that they were all on holiday. The group could all put their full energy into getting Kero better quickly. Yue hadn't been heard much from since he had transformed away shortly after making sure Kero was comfortable.  
  
At the dinner table one night, Syaoran brought the subject up. "Yue's been a bit quiet lately . . . is he okay?"  
  
Yukito carefully balanced his bowl atop of the pile he was amassing. "Hmm?" He said distractedly as he leant over the table to get some more food.  
  
"Thank goodness," said Meilin quietly to Tomoyo, "That we are using paper plates! I'd hate to have to wash up after him!"  
  
Yukito smiled as he pretended not to hear the little red-eyed girl, he tucked into the hot stew happily.  
  
Syaoran poured himself and Touya another drink; Touya nodded his thanks, as the brown-eyed boy repeated himself louder, "I said, is Yue all right? I mean; nobody has seen much of him since Kero woke up."  
  
Yuki paused; he stared at the younger boy. Syaoran frowned, "What?"  
  
Yukito continued to stare, then his head dipped slowly as if it suddenly weighed a lot, his eyes slid shut and his fringe covered his brow. The group looked at his in concern, there was no full transformation taking place. After a few quiet moments, Yuki's head rose slowly, he breathed in and regarded the group coolly. His usually warm amber eyes had taken a serious glint as they fell on Syaoran. "I'm fine;" Yuki's voice was now cool like the judgement maker's.  
  
Touya was taken back by this, "Yue?"  
  
Yuki flickered his gaze at Touya, in Yue's usual manner. "Yes?"  
  
"Why are you in Yuki's body? Where's Yuki?"  
  
Yuki's eyes flicked slightly and their warmth returned, "I'm fine To-ya!" Yuki's voice was now his own again.  
  
Meilin blinked and asked the question everyone was thinking, "What is going on with you two?"  
  
Yuki's eyes crinkled with warmth as he explained, "Well, Yue's a little tired--- I most certainly am not!" Yue snapped as he interrupted. Everyone except Tomoyo gapped in shock as Yue and Yuki had their little argument, Tomoyo (of course) was setting up her camera, "How kawaii!!" She gushed.  
  
"Bah!" Barked Yue before Yukito's head dipped once more. Touya reached over to grasp Yukito's shoulder, as the snow bunny looked up once more. Yukito's warm smile and gentle eyes reassured the group it was just Yuki now.  
  
"What happened there?" Asked Sakura quietly.  
  
"Ooohh. . . Yue gets like that when he's sleepy." A deep grumbling voice said from the doorway. Sakura turned to see Keroberos sitting there, shoulders drooping, and smiling tiredly.  
  
"Kero-chan! What are you doing here?!" Tomoyo jumped to her feet and rushed over, "You should be in bed."  
  
"I'm so hungry," he whispered, and gazed longingly at the table, "I feel like I haven't eaten in days . . ."  
  
"You haven't" said Syaoran simply as he stood. He picked up a spare plate and piled it with a few simple pieces of meat. As he past Yuki, the snow bunny's head dipped again. When Yuki's head rose again, he glared at the lion with barely held disapproval, "You should be in bed!" He snapped.  
  
"But I'm so hungry," Kero yawned weakly. "You're all eating without me . . . I could smell the food from upstairs . . . and it smelt like you were all having fun without me . . ."  
  
Yue folded his other form's arms and glared at Kero, "We didn't know you were awake . . . if I had, I would have brought you something."  
  
Kero nibbled at some of the meat Syaoran fed him and looked thoughtfully at Yue's other form. He swallowed, "I'll go back . . ." he offered comprising, " . . . if you come upstairs with me and get some sleep, you're exhausted . . ."  
  
"I most certainly am not!" Yue snapped then flushed a deep red. In Yukito's form he couldn't quite control his facial expressions.  
  
Kero yawned, "That's one of the conditions, Yue . . ."  
  
Yue's blush receded somewhat as he asked, "What's the other?"  
  
Kero's head lolled slightly towards Syaoran, and he grinned lazily, "That the Gaki continues to hand-feed me . . ."  
  
Sakura smiled, "Of course!"  
  
Syaoran glared at Kero, "Awww . . ." he said sarcastically, "You are getting better after all, aren't you?"  
  
Kero smiled, and went to reply but his eyes rolled back and his paws slid out from under him. "Umpft!"  
  
  
  
Once Kero was safely upstairs . . . "I'm deadly serious now!" groaned Touya as he, Syaoran and Yuki hauled the sleeping lion up the stairs, "He is *so* going on a diet when he gets better!" . . . Sakura turned to Yuki, "What's wrong with Yue?"  
  
"He's tired," Yuki explained quietly, "We tried to transform at the table, but we couldn't manage the full thing."  
  
"The adrenalin that has been keeping him awake must be wearing off then." Said Tomoyo matter-of-factly as she passed them, she crouched down by Kero holding a small plate of food. She cocked his head to look at him; "I some how don't think he'll be eating anything tonight."  
  
"Good!" Groused Syaoran.  
  
Sakura looked once more at Yuki. "Will both of you . . ."  
  
Yuki's head dipped once, his eyes shutting and opening quickly. He looked at Kero's large sleeping form as he spoke, "We'll be fine, Mistress." Yuki's voice laced with Yue's and combined to create a soft, yet cool, friendly, yet respectful tone. Sakura put her hand on Yukito's arm and lead him away from the rest of the group. She pulled him into the corridor, "I . . ." she began quietly, Yuki/Yue looked at her, his face betraying Yue's tiredness under Yukito usual happy countenance, this sight strengthen her resolve, "Yue. . . I command you to sleep tonight."  
  
She pursued her lips together, and stared at him intensely, it was the first time she had issued an order outside of an emergency. The cool guardian always seemed to be more powerful than she, and she had a hard time believing that she was the one in control.  
  
Yue nodded once, "Yes, Mistress . . ." he murmured, and Yukito's head dipped again, Yuki smiled, "Thank you." He cast one more look into the bedroom where his true form's brother lay then glided softly past Sakura towards her brother's room, he paused in the door way and looked at her. For a few seconds he looked as if he was listening to something, then smiled, "Yue . . . wishes me to say . . ." Yuki dipped his head once respectfully toward her, "Good night, Mistress, sleep well."  
  
Sakura nodded her head in a similar fashion, "You too . . . to the both of you."  
  
As the being in her brother's doorway paused one more time and smiled at her, Sakura wasn't entirely sure who was smiling . . . It was a warm smile like Yukito's but it had shades from Yue's own repressed expression.  
  
  
  
The next morning Syaoran went into the kitchen early to start breakfast. He didn't admit it aloud but he was glad that Keroberos had finally woken up and proved that the sickness that had taken him wasn't as serious as they all feared it would be. He knew he wasn't only glad because the effect had cheered Sakura up immensely, and because it was no longer a strain on Yuki, but also because it meant the plush toy he had played 'Insult-and-bite-my- finger' with for the last few years was going to be well.  
  
He was still a little drowsy, and was just rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, when the kettle passed itself to him, "Thank-you." he muttered as he turned to fill it in the sink.  
  
"Oh, already done that," the kettle quite cheerfully informed him.  
  
"Oh . . ." Syaoran turned and put the kettle on. He then turned to the stove, to find it was already cooking a full breakfast.  
  
"And I've already started," the stove told him quite gruffly.  
  
"Oh . . ." Syaoran reached into the breadbin and pulled out a couple of slices.  
  
"I've done that too, my cute little descendant!" The toaster cried with some great amusement.  
  
"Oh . . . thank you . . ." Syaoran stopped and turned back to the bread bin, "Wait . . . I'm not related to a toaster . . ." Syaoran peered at the toaster, " . . . am I?"  
  
The toaster snorted with laugher, and the kettle said to the stove, "He really hasn't woken up yet, has he?"  
  
The stove sighed sharply, "And he wonders why he is not the Card Master!" It spoke to the toaster; "He thinks he's related to a toaster."  
  
The kettle came to a boil, and, as Syaoran continued to stare at the talking toaster in wonderment, passed him a steaming cup of coffee. "Here," it sang bemusedly, "This should clear your head."  
  
"Thank you . . ." he muttered, as he took a sip. His eyes widened as the strong coffee slid down his throat. Then he winced, the coffee was close to undrinkable, he like his coffee black and strong but not so strong that it needed to come with a miniature crowbar to pry your fingers off the cup. He blinked as Ruby moon came swimming into his vision, she grinned. "Good morning . . ." she said, "Still think I'm the kettle?"  
  
Syaoran frowned in confusion, and glanced at the stove, Spinel glance over his shoulder as he propped himself up on his hind paws to peer into the frying pans. He shook his head at Syaoran disapprovingly; "You really do need to get better at waking up."  
  
Syaoran turned to find Eriol standing, leant against the counter near to toaster. He tried for all of six seconds to keep a straight face, "Maybe . . ." he laughed, "We should trace our family history . . . maybe there is a toaster in there somewhere . . ."  
  
  
  
Once breakfast was finished, the rest of the house was woken, with the exception of Yukito and Keroberos. "So . . ." began Eriol as he sipped at his tea, "I feel Keroberos . . . he's recovering slowly."  
  
"Uh-huh!" Said Sakura cheerfully; "The other day we came down and found him trying to get a pudding out of the fridge . . . the only problem was he had fallen asleep before he could eat it!"  
  
Eriol laughed, "That sounds like Keroberos."  
  
Tomoyo smiled; "Have you found anything in your books that could help him?"  
  
Eriol looked down at his plate, "No, I haven't," he said with disappointment, "I simply never took into account my guardians would ever fall ill. Therefore I assumed that they would be able to recover from any illness as they would any injury . . . I never cast any spell that would strengthen either of their immune systems . . ."  
  
Nakura put her hand over Eriol's, it was clear that the young boy had stayed up every night searching hard for a cure, "That's why we're here today!" She said quickly, she nodded strongly; "We're going to help take care of Keroberos."  
  
She cast a sidelong glance at Spinel; the two had other reasons for bring Eriol here . . .  
  
  
  
A soft knock at his door caused Spinel to look up, "Come." He said softly knowing who it was.  
  
Ruby entered in her false form, they had taken to their false forms during the night so not to disturb their Master, and to limit his perception that either of them was moving around.  
  
"Spinel . . .?" He shuffled up on the bed and indicated that she should sit down. She was quiet and looked as if she was on the verge of tears, it wasn't the first night she was like this, ever since they had found out about Keroberos' illness, the Master had locked himself in his study, pouring over all of his old books, and the new ones he had written since their creation.  
  
Both of the two guardians would take it in turns to creep up to the study and peer thru the door, to check on him. Sometimes they found him working diligently, scribbling away at a notebook, sometimes they would find him screwing a paper up, rejecting the spell he had worked out just as he had several others. Times when they would find him asleep on his books, and times when they'd find him gazing worriedly out of the window. One time Spinel had found him gently stroking a page from a book they knew only as his Oldest Book, they knew the book contained things from his past life . . . feathers from both Yue and Keroberos, a lock of hair from Yue's fringe and a lock from Keroberos' tail and the detailed pictures he had drawn of them before he had created them and after. Or another time Ruby had found him holding the Oldest Book close to his chest, one elbow leant heavily on the desk, and his fist pressed hard against his mouth, staring hard at the rejected pile of spells and notes, dejectedly.  
  
"Spinel . . ." said Ruby, she only used his name properly when she was upset, "Spinel . . . he's crying again . . ."  
  
Spinel shoulder's slumped, it was distressing for them to think that he was upset about something that they could neither help nor solve.  
  
"What are we going to do?" She dropped off the bed to kneel closer to him, "We have to do something, he's not sleeping or eating properly . . ."  
  
Spinel folded his arms, and stared out the window, "We'll take him to see the Card Mistress . . . perhaps, since he can't find a cure, perhaps caring for the guardian beast with the help of the others will help . . ."  
  
  
  
. . . Nakura looked at her Master, it might have not been apparent to the others seated around the table, but the boy magician was paler than usual. They had left an hour before sunrise, and had come straight over to the house. They had left so early so the Master could look in on Keroberos without the others bothering him. As Ruby and Spinel moved quietly around the house doing little jobs such as tidying and preparing the day's meal, he had sat with Keroberos quietly, whispering his apologies and stroking his fur.  
  
Spinel pulled the gathered group's attention away from Eriol again by stating loudly, "If . . . you do not mind that we stay here as well . . . it would be very draining on us to fly here every day!"  
  
As Touya answered the blue panther, Tomoyo glanced at Eriol, although his guardians were trying very hard to distract attention away from him, she had noticed what they hoped to conceal. She stood, "I'm going to get some more food," she glanced around the table needlessly as if looking around for someone to help, her eyes fell on Eriol. "Eriol? Would you mind lending me a hand?"  
  
He glanced up from his plate and nodded. He followed her silently.  
  
  
  
"Are you all right?" She asked him quietly, as they walked the short distance to the kitchen.  
  
He thought about it for a few moments, "Yes . . . I am now." He blushed, "Is it really that obvious that I'm having a rough time of it, or are Ruby and Spinel trying too hard to hide it?"  
  
Tomoyo chuckled a little, "A little of both." She sighed, "I'm glad he's getting better . . ."  
  
Eriol watched the purple haired girl closely as she moved around collecting the promised food, "Must have been hard . . ."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Pretending that you knew it was going to turn out like this," he said knowingly, she paused with her back to him. "I mean, if Meilin broke down, she could turn to Syaoran, although my cute little descendant would hide, take his pain out with him to train, Sakura would have all of them and you, Yuki would just be transformed away should it ever get to him, Touya would go to Yuki, and Yue would have the support of Sakura, Touya and in some respects, Yuki . . . but you?" He moved forward and put his hands on her shoulders, "I bet you just smile and pretend that nothing out of the ordinary is happening . . ." he leant his chin on her shoulder, and murmured, "Just as always. Tomoyo-chan the Invincible protecting Sakura from sadness . . ."  
  
She pulled away from him, and turned to look at him, she started to cry as she nodded slowly, he smiled slightly and pulled her into his arms, "Shhh . . . it's alright, tell you what . . ." he murmured, "I'll let you be my shoulder to cry on . . ." he pulled back to look her in the eyes, "If you let me be yours . . ."  
  
She tearfully snorted with laughter, and wiped her nose quickly with the back of her hand, "Hiirawagizawa . . . that was so cliché!"  
  
"I know . . ." He sighed theatrically, "Blame it on the past life . . ." he shook his head as he picked up the tray she had been preparing, "I lived through Shakespeare . . ."  
  
Tomoyo laughed lightly. Eriol cast one of his all-knowing smiles at her as he said, "Tell you what . . . when I feel like blubbering like a little girl I'll come to you and then you tell me what colour your underwear is to cheer me up."  
  
She folded her arms, and cocked her head, "I don't think so."  
  
He sighed again, "Okay, fine, a compromise . . . I come bawling to you like a little lass . . . if, when you feel like crying an ocean, you come to me . . ." his voice dropped to a sincere tone for once, " . . . and you let me kiss it better . . ."  
  
She blushed and glanced away, she didn't catch the slightly worried look that passed over Eriol's features, //have I gone to far? // He thought. He forced the smirking grin back into place when she looked back at him.  
  
She walked towards the door, and paused, "Only . . ." she held a finger up at him, "Only if you take that smirk off your face."  
  
He smirked wider, "What smirk?"  
  
"That one" she pointed at him.  
  
"No, trust me," he raised his eyebrows quickly, "This is my face in a normal pose . . ."  
  
"Oh really?"  
  
"Yeah . . . I sleep like this . . ."  
  
Tomoyo nodded slowly unconvinced, "Yeah . . ."  
  
"No seriously . . ." he joined her by the door, "Wanna sleep together and find out?" He grinned, and leaned towards her conspiratorially, "I'll let you take pictures . . ."  
  
"Hiirawagizawa!" she shook her head and walked away.  
  
"Call me Eriol," he called after her, "I love the way you say it!"  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
And now it's time for LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
DrM: Konnichiwa!! Because poor ol' Yue is a lil sleepy, here are my co- hosts for today's A/N's --  
  
Syaoran: [interrupting] No, seriously . . . am I?  
  
DrM: What?  
  
Syaoran: Related to a toaster?  
  
DrM: [points at the story] GO READ THE FIC AGAIN! And when you done, review it!  
  
Eriol: I think I mentioned this in the other one, but I'm not that obsessed with Tomoyo's underwear . . . I mean if I really wanted to know I would just-  
  
Tomoyo: Just what Hiirawagizawa?  
  
Eriol: I'd. . . I'd. . . just ask you politely.  
  
Tomoyo: Hands up everyone who thinks he's talking bull . . .  
  
DrM:[raises hand] Anyway minna-chan, I'd just like to put in a lil note to Nakuru. . .  
  
Nakuru: What about me?  
  
DrM: okay, one: I'm never giving back the Master's chair of evil, it's too comfortable . . . two: changing you into Spinel was too much fun and I'm tempted to do it to you again . . . and three . . . I can't think of a 'three' so I'll just say thank you! It's fun when the reviewers play along! Speaking of reviews . . . DON'T FORGET TO R&R PLEASE . . . reviews help to lift Writer's Block . . .HOOEEEEE!!!  
  
Sakura: HEY!! That's my Line!! 


	6. I want you dead!!

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be!  
  
Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
  
  
Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat.  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
  
  
Part six: I want you dead!!  
  
  
  
"Okay, okay, let's get this sorted out. . ." the group gathered around the table once more at lunch time the next day, Tomoyo stood, "We can't keep up these five hour stretches for the rest of the time," she looked pointedly Sakura who was the main culprit and then at Eriol and Yuki, who yawned widely, and started to nod off.  
  
"Are you listening Yukito? "  
  
Yukito snored slightly.  
  
"Yuki?" Asked Touya  
  
Yukito snored then murmured, "Can someone carry us up please? I can't wake him up . . ." Yue complained.  
  
Touya sighed as he hauled the snow bunny up and carried him out the room.  
  
"You know what . . ." murmured Yue through Yuki's voice, "There were times I have imagined you doing this . . . although I gotta say, I imagined it being a little more romantic . . ." Yuki's head lolled forward as it creased in a frown, "Am I talking or thinking all of this?"  
  
"You're talking," Touya grunted as he pushed the door open to his bedroom, "And you too are going on a diet!"  
  
  
  
"So I propose we draw up a schedule . . ." Tomoyo held up a small hat. "And we're going to do it by chance, so everyone can have the *chance* to work with everyone else." Syaoran held up his hand. "Yes Syaoran?"  
  
"What if we get paired with someone we want to cripple painfully . . . or even kill . . . or at least, if; given half the chance, would let die, laugh in their pain-riddled face, then dance merrily over their grave?" Tomoyo cocked her head in disapproval, Syaoran continued; "It's a serious question."  
  
Touya sailed into the room, and frowned "There will be no blood shed in this house, if there must be any blood shed, for the honour of the family, tradition's sake, or for other such purposes, it will be taken out into the garden."  
  
"How do you do that?" Syaoran flinched. Touya didn't answer as he sat down, merely raising an eyebrow at Tomoyo indicating that she should continue. "So every one write their name down . . . " She put the hat in the middle of the table, " . . .And then put it in the hat."  
  
After each slip had been put in, Tomoyo picked the hat up again and mixed the scrunched up names. "Okay," she withdrew the first name, "The first two hour shift goes to . . ."  
  
  
  
"Why me?" Grumbled Syaoran, "Why? What did I do in a past life to deserve this? It must have been so seriously unspeakable that the gods feel I must live this horrible life . . . I must have been Hitler or something!"  
  
His partner glanced up at him; "I don't think it could have been that terrible . . ."  
  
Syaoran folded his arms, "How much longer must we stay together?"  
  
His partner glanced at the wall clock, "About one hour fifty minutes . . ."  
  
"By the ancestors! Why don't I have the time card anymore?!" Syaoran threw his arms into the air and resumed his pacing.  
  
The afternoon was a warm wintry day, Syaoran rested his arms on the windowsill and glared out, "Why me? Why? Why?! WHY?!"  
  
"Would you like to know the answer?" His colleague flicked a page over.  
  
"You don't know the answer!" Syaoran snapped over his shoulder. Then thought of something, "Aren't you the least bit worried about what I could do to you?" He squinted at his chosen partner.  
  
His partner thought about it for a few moments then smiled. "No."  
  
Syaoran growled as he stormed over towards the infuriating other. "I want you dead!" He said passionately.  
  
Hiirawagizawa Eriol folded his bookmark over the page to save his place and closed the book; he stood and looked at Syaoran. After a few moments he raised his hand to Syaoran's cheek, "You're so cute!" He laughed as he pinched the Chinese boy's cheek.  
  
He ducked out the way when Syaoran lunged at him. "I'm going to get some tea;" he called as he slipped out the room, "Would you like some?"  
  
He managed to dodge the flying pillow that came hurtling towards him.  
  
  
  
Eriol was still chuckling quietly as he descended the stairs, as he crossed into the kitchen, Syaoran's cousin was standing there preparing some sort of stew.  
  
"Good evening . . . Meilin, is it?" He said politely.  
  
The girl nodded, and then motioned him to be quiet. She pointed through the open living room door; most of the others were fast asleep preparing for their shifts over the next few days. He nodded his understanding and hauled himself on to the counter. As soon as he was comfortable he waved his hand to cause the kettle to levitate to the sink to be filled again. As he magicked a cup of tea together, he said softly, "Would you like some?"  
  
The girl turned to look at him; "Can't you do anything without magic?"  
  
"Oh yes," he said, "But this way is much quieter."  
  
She sighed and nodded, "Okay, then I'll have some green tea please." She turned back to the bubbling pot, "I have a shift with . . ." she pulled a copy of the schedule out of her apron pocket. "Syaoran, I'll have to get some sleep to make sure I'm very alert."  
  
"You don't have any magic . . ." Eriol mentioned quietly.  
  
The girl focused on her stew, "No, I don't."  
  
"You're so lucky." He breathed enviously.  
  
This unexpected confession made Meilin turn and look at him; her eyes narrowed "Don't mock me!"  
  
He snorted without mirth; "I'm serious . . ." he trailed off as he stared at her.  
  
"What's so good about being the only member of the family that doesn't have the tiniest amount of magic?"  
  
"That's not true."  
  
"I'm not the only member?"  
  
"Well, that too . . ." Eriol paused as he looked at her again, "You have a strong aura . . . did you know that?"  
  
"No. . ." She hopped on to the counter beside him easily, "Does that mean anything?"  
  
"Yeah. . ." Eriol nodded, "You have a strong spirit, lots of fight in you. Yours is red, the colour of life. Well . . . the stronger side of life. You're magic doesn't lie in. . ." He raised his hand and a small glow appeared, it pulsed and throbbed then exploded. "It doesn't lie in that . . . it lies in. . ." he motioned all around him, " . . .In the things you do and say, in the way you care for your friends and family. I predict you will have a good family, a strong family, both in spirit and in magic." The kettle whistled its readiness. He lifted his hand and made the kettle pour the tea.  
  
Meilin smiled, "How do you know?" She nodded her thanks as he levitated the two cups over.  
  
Eriol didn't answer; he hoped off the counter and started to walk to the door. He paused and smiled at her. "My. . . I mean, Clow's mother. . ." he smiled even more, "She was just like you. . . the magic bypassed her. . . and went straight to me."  
  
Meilin blinked in surprise as the dark haired magician stared at her intently. She sipped at her tea, still thinking about what he had said. "You said that I wasn't the only other member of the Li family that didn't have the magic . . . your mother was the other?"  
  
Eriol nodded once, then turned and strolled out the door.  
  
  
  
Syaoran was tucking a pillow back under Kero's paws when Eriol entered.  
  
"Are you sure you didn't want any tea?"  
  
"I'll get it myself," Syaoran stood and walked to the door.  
  
"Wait," Eriol crossed to Sakura's desk and pulled the Sakura book from out of the drawer. Kero's picture was still missing from the cover. He went and sat near Kero, holding the book in his lap. He looked up at Syaoran who after a few moments sat opposite.  
  
"You can't use them." Syaoran eyed Eriol suspiciously.  
  
"No, I can't . . . but I can ask them politely." He placed a hand on the cover. "Cards of Sakura . . . may I speak with thou?"  
  
The lock snapped open and Eriol placed the book softly on the floor in front of him. The book softly blew open, and the cards glowed as they fluttered out. They fell into a regimental circle as they floated around Eriol and Syaoran.  
  
"Greetings cards. . ." Eriol smiled as he addressed his past life's creation. "Good now; pick an orator, so I might talk with thee."  
  
The cards piled themselves together and began to shuffle themselves faster and faster, until two cards span out of the pack. The room's shadows and light immediately divided and settled on either sides of the room, Eriol sat on the dark half and Syaoran on the light. They looked up to see The Light and The Dark peering down at them.  
  
"Young Hiirawagizawa Eriol, reincarnation of The Master Clow Reed . . ." the two spoke at the same time, their voices combined to create a spooky echo, which was impossible to tell where one voice started and where the other ended. "Thou art our master not, thou hast no control over nor canst thou assume our functions."  
  
"Thy loyalty to thy newest master is commendable . . ." Eriol chuckled, "But still, I hath no desire nor want to ask thee to disobey, I wish merely to replicate another cup of tea . . . with the Twin card."  
  
The two tall cards shared a disbelieving look; "Thou hast broken our seal for this?! Hast thou become paralysed?!" the pair pointed out the door, "Canst thou not get thee to a kitchen?!"  
  
Eriol chuckled again; "I wish simply to hold a converse wit' thou as well. Our beings hath part'd for too long a time . . ."  
  
The two faded and returned to their card form. The two floated back to the waiting pack of cards and reshuffled themselves again. There was a moment of quiet shuffling while the cards decided whether or not to honour Eriol's request. Syaoran leant forward, "What kind of language was that?"  
  
"Ye Olde English," Eriol answered as he gazed at the cards.  
  
"How old?"  
  
"Clow's time old. . ."  
  
"How old's that?"  
  
Eriol smile knowingly but gave no answer. The Twin card spun out of the pack and materialised in front of the pair.  
  
"Thy request hast-"the pink hair twin nodded,  
  
"---Hast been agreed." The blue haired twin nodded.  
  
They pulled the cup out of his hands and held it between them. They looked up and smiled at each other.  
  
"Be sure to clone the cup and saucer as well, Twin!" Said Eriol warningly.  
  
The grins quickly disappeared as they looked at him, he turned to Syaoran, "I know them . . . they'd follow every order you give them. . . right to the letter!"  
  
The two beige beings stared each other then stepped forward, and through each other. They came out both holding an identical cup. "Thank you," said Syaoran as he and Eriol accepted the two cups.  
  
The twins bounced a quick bow then disappeared. The pack spun once more, and spat out two more cards. As the two cards floated there, the pack spun again as if asking a question. The two cards spun in response. The pack paused, then floated back to the book. The two remaining cards spun faster and then exploded into their forms. The Firey folded her flame filled wings and the Earthy straightened the hem of her skirt. "So it is true!" Said the Firey, "He *is* ill!" Her flaming hair shook with anger, "Our guardian is dying!"  
  
The Earthy pulled her heavy skirt up as she kneel beside him, "Thou hath been a true protector of us. . ." she mournfully, "We thank thou. . ."  
  
"He's not dying!" Said Syaoran. "He's just got the 'flu!"  
  
"The 'flu?! Is that it?!" The Firey sat heavily on the bed, "You mean we were all getting worried about nuthin' ?!"  
  
"Firey! Thou hast been in thy humanoid form for too long!" Chastened The Earthy, "Hast thou forgotten how to speak politely?"  
  
"I'll give you damn *politely*!" The young girl threw her head back in annoyance, "There I'm thinkin' he's kicking the buck-"  
  
"FIREY!" Earthy stood and pointed at her.  
  
"What now?!" Firey rolled her eyes in exasperation.  
  
"Thou hast set the divan on *fire*!"  
  
Firey looked at the damage she had caused to the bed, "Ah . . ." she muttered. "Crap . . ."  
  
  
  
Touya walked, just coming up to the second floor when he smelt burning, his eyes widen in concern when he saw thick black smoke. He kicked the door to his sister's room open, and out stumbled Syaoran and Eriol. Syaoran was a complete mess his face smudged with dirt, his clothes smoky and he was coughing like a good'un. Touya turned to look at Eriol, who was in pristine condition, his pale white face perfectly unsmudged. Touya looked at Syaoran again, who was taking deep, heaving breathes, as he struggled to clear his smoke filled lungs, then at Eriol, who . . . wasn't. Touya looked at Syaoran, as he slid down the wall, evidently his legs couldn't support him anymore. Then at Eriol, whose legs . . . could. Touya grabbed Eriol by his pristine collar and hauled him off his feet. It didn't take him long to come to the conclusion that. . . "You did this!" he roared.  
  
Eriol's eyes widened slightly in surprise, "No, I didn't." He protested.  
  
Touya instantly dropped him and hauled Syaoran up instead. "THEN YOU DID THIS!!" He yelled at the poor smoke seized boy.  
  
"Well, aaaaaactually it was my fault . . ." came a strange female voice. Touya turned to see two strange women behind him standing in the doorway. One, dressed in Earthy green tones, stared disapprovingly at a flame haired younger girl . . .  
  
Touya dropped Syaoran and pointed at the flame haired girl, "CLOW CARD!"  
  
"Eh heh heh . . .Heeeh . . ." the girl laughed sheepishly, "Who's this?" she said quickly to the other woman, who shrugged.  
  
"I know not," she replied rather haughtily, "Young sir! Thou willst identify thyself!"  
  
"Oh! Oh!" A small voice from behind them cried, "I know, I know!"  
  
The two taller women stepped aside to reveal a smaller girl, she can't have been older than his sister. Touya felt a small pang of deja vu, "I know you . . ." he pointed at the girl.  
  
"Oh yeah, we met before . . ." she giggled girlishly.  
  
"Oh . . ." the two women said together, and then turned to him in understanding,  
  
"So, thou art Yo-yo!" said the older woman.  
  
The little girl's face contorted in embarrassment, as she slapped the older woman's arm, "To-ya!!" She corrected hastily, then blushed as she corrected herself again, "I mean Touya, Kinomoto Touya!"  
  
The fire woman, circled Touya, as if assessing him, "So you are Kinomoto Touya . . . the mistress' . . . father?"  
  
"Nooo!" Said the poor little girl, "Brother! He's her brother!"  
  
The older woman chuckled, they were teasing the poor little girl, "We've heard aaaalllllll about thou . . ."  
  
"You have?" Asked Touya eyeing the three suspiciously, the smallest girl looked as if she was going to die of embarrassment.  
  
"Oh yeah . . ." continued the fire woman, "Right down to your . . ." she smirked, as she quoted breathlessly, "Your sparking sapphire eyes, and your dark, unruly, coffee-coloured hair . . ." the woman sighed tragically and pretended to swoon against the older Earthy woman. "You dark, tall, handsome, *passionate* stranger, you!" She started to giggle, "OW!!" She screamed as the small girl kicked her shin.  
  
The small girl looked up at Touya and did an extremely good impression of his sister when she used to have a crush on Yuki and he had said some comment to annoy her. Touya blinked in surprise he'd never had this happen to him before and wasn't entirely sure how he was supposed to act. He reached back into his memory and tried to think about what Yuki did when Sakura did something like this.  
  
The small girl blushed furiously, as Touya smiled at her, and looked like he hadn't noticed her brief flash of violence. "So you said we had met before . . ." Touya continued; he had a good idea when they had met, but he wanted to be sure.  
  
"Ano . . . ano . . ." the girl was at a loss of words; Touya was still smiling at her. "Aaaannnnooo . . ."  
  
"Well, the first time you met," the Firey girl stuck her finger in the air; " . . .She led you off a cliff edge."  
  
"That was an accident!" The small girl protested. "I didn't know the cliff was *there* there, I just knew it was around *there* someplace . . ."  
  
"And the second time she had been order to pretend to be the mistress." Continued the Earthy woman.  
  
"Uh-huuh," said Touya he turned his attention on the little girl again and crouched beside her, she blushed again and looked down. She clutched the little mirror closer to her chest. "And I've never been able to ask you, what is your name?"  
  
"The Mi-Mir-Mi-" the girl trembled slightly and then gathered her courage to raise her head and look him in the eye, "The Mirror card."  
  
He smiled reassuringly and took her hand, "Konbanwa . . . it's a pleasure to meet you."  
  
"Awwww! Don't do that!" Moaned the flame haired woman; "She'll be hayaaaann- ing all night now!"  
  
The Mirror blushed again and said, "These are two of the older cards of our pack. The Firey and the Earthy."  
  
The Earthy nodded graciously, while the Firey muttered, "Hayyaaaannnn, Toooooo-yaaaaa! Every five minutes."  
  
A blue skinned woman poked her head thru the door, "Fire's out now."  
  
"Who are you?" Asked Touya.  
  
"I know you!" The blue woman slithered out of the room and pointed at him, "You *stopped* me from drowning that penguin!!!"  
  
"This is The Watery!" The Mirror laughed nervously, Watery always said she was going to drown the one who had ruined her fun.  
  
"Who the hell are you?!" The Watery folded her webbed arms angrily.  
  
"The mistress' brother, Touya," answered the Earthy.  
  
"What?!" The Watery turned on the older woman. "Damnit! . . .Wait. . . the mistress' brother? Isn't he the one Mirror keeps going---"  
  
"Haayyyyyaaaaaannn about? Oh, Yeah!" Said the Firey. "And he's been grinning at her . . . so tell Silent she's on duty tonight *again*." She looked threateningly at mirror and folded her flaming arms. "Either that, or you're top card tonight!"  
  
"Ohhh!" the watery nodded knowingly and looked at Touya. "Mister 'Drop Dead Gorgeous', are we? Mister 'Oh, He's So Handsome!', are we?" She clasped her hands together helplessly, and Firey mimicked her, the pair pressed their shoulders together, "Mister HAAAAAYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAANNNN!!!!"  
  
"Ladies . . ." Eriol came to the rescue of the poor little girl; "I think we've had enough fun at the expense of Mirror. Please return to your book."  
  
Watery threw one more threatening glance at Touya, as the Firey clasped her hands to her chest and sighed mockingly, Earthy just pushed the giggling, flame haired girl into the bedroom, casting one more respectful nod. Touya, Syaoran and Eriol walked back into the room. Two more women were in the room. One was sweeping her clock around the room, every speck of soot disappeared under it. She nodded, "There we go! The mistress will never know."  
  
"And you are?" Said Touya.  
  
"The Erase card." She answered, and then returned to her card form.  
  
The second woman was leaning out of the window. The Mirror ran up to her, "We're ready now." She said brightly. The pale yellow woman drew her arms back, and a small gust of wind pulled Keroberos back into the room. She motioned with her arms and the wind lowered Keroberos back to his bed. Her gleaming gold eyes flickered to Eriol, "Next time. . ." her voice as soft as the wind, ". . . Go downstairs and fetch a cup of tea thyself. . ."  
  
"This is The Windy card!" The Mirror card quickly introduced Touya to her favourite sister card. The Windy curtsied elegantly, and dissipated slightly to wrap herself around the mirror, she reassembled herself to crouch down low beside her. "So this is Touya." She whispered quietly.  
  
The Mirror blushed again. The Windy smiled gently, "A pleasure to meet you, Kinomoto-san, our little reflection has told us much about you." He nodded respectfully to the polite card as she pressed her hands against the Mirror's shoulders; "It is time to seal the book again."  
  
"So soon?" The mirror looked up at the windy. The Windy smiled gently. She released the girl's shoulder and returned to her card form, "Two hours, then be sure to close the book when you return to the form you were meant to be in!" The kindly card said as she sank back into the book. "Kinomoto- san, I leave the care of this card in your charge."  
  
Touya closed the book, and placed it on the desk, "I will take care of her."  
  
The girl giggled, "Thank you!" She held her mirror away from her. It levitated and span until it was the size of her body. When it stopped spinning, she stepped through the mirror and walked out the other side.  
  
As the glow from the magic faded, the mirror stood there, she still had her tremendous long hair but was now wearing one of his sister's favourite pink pyjamas. Her wings fluttered gently, and her mirror returned to its smaller size. The little girl put it on the desk and turned. She grinned, "Can I help care for him?"  
  
  
  
Nakuru hopped up the stairs, happily. Her shift with Touya was due to start any second. As she reached the top, Eriol and Syaoran walked out of the bathroom.  
  
"How is it that you got away without a single speck of soot on you?" Syaoran furiously towel dried his hair. The Chinese boy was in his boxers and Eriol had his clothes neatly folded over one arm.  
  
"Yeah," Eriol nodded, "That's what my butler asked after the great fire of London . . ." he wrapped an arm around Syaoran's shoulders, "I'll tell you what I told him, when one lives near the Thames, one will use the Thames . . ."  
  
Syaoran towelled his ear, "Oh, I get it you get fire damage to the brain!"  
  
Eriol chuckled as Nakuru drew nearer, "What happened?"  
  
"Firey sat on Sakura's bed . . ." Answered Eriol calmly.  
  
"And set fire to it." Finished Syaoran. They continued past as if the whole thing was suddenly explained. Nakuru shrugged and continued into Sakura's room. Kero still slept on the floor, he looked a bit wind-swept. She turned to look at Touya; he was just putting new covers on. "TOOO-YAAAA!!!" She squealed as she leapt on to his back.  
  
"Get off me!"  
  
"To-ya! To-ya! To-ya!!" She squealed, as he stood straight. She didn't notice the small girl crawl out from under the blanket. She blinked at the sight, and then glowed slightly.  
  
"Akizuki! What are you doing here?" Asked Touya irritably. Nakuru blinked in surprise, there were two Touyas.  
  
"N-Nani?" She slid off the back of the Touya she held on to.  
  
The one on the bed smirked at the other, "Damn! If only I had pretended not to notice . . . sorry Mirror card. It was a nice try."  
  
Nakuru squinted at the real Touya, then at the fake one on the bed. Confusion spread over the moon guardian's face as the real one remained silent and looked slightly innocent, and disappointed.  
  
The one on the bed stepped off and stood by the real Touya. Nakuru looked from one to the other, their auras were almost exactly alike. Her shoulders drooped, with her confusion. As the girl walked out the room to fetch Spinel, Touya grabbed the fake Touya, and pulled the replica close. "I could kiss you!" He said happily.  
  
The mirror's version of Touya blushed furiously, and laughed nervously, "I'm not that good . . ." she said self-deprecatingly.  
  
  
  
As Nakuru dragged Spinel up the stairs to sort something out for her, Syaoran and Eriol sat in the kitchen together. Syaoran pulled on a sweater Touya had leant him; Eriol set a small bowl of rice in front of him.  
  
Eriol picked up his own chopsticks and picked at the rice as he sat opposite his distant relative. They ate in silence, until Eriol looked up at Syaoran. "So when are you going to tell her?"  
  
"Tell whom what?"  
  
"Sakura." Eriol said quietly, and then patted Syaoran's back as he spluttered on his food.  
  
Syaoran downed a glass of water before his voice returned, "what? Ho-how did you know?"  
  
Eriol smiled and resumed eating, he let his distant relative stew for a few moments before saying, "Everybody knows . . . I mean it, simply everybody knows, *everybody* . . . except Sakura . . . and maybe an executive producer at Nelvana studios in America . . . I think he's in charge of some crummy dubbed anim--" Eriol stopped his rambling when he caught sight of Syaoran's confused look. He coughed quickly and continued, "Look, I just knew, it's fairly obvious that you care a great deal for her . . . and have done for many years . . . and yet . . ." He looked up and stared him in the eye, "You still wait for her to realise it."  
  
Syaoran picked at his food, as he tried to think of a good excuse for it.  
  
"She's a good girl . . . she could make you very happy if you told her . . . or very sad if you don't."  
  
"I know." Syaoran looked at him, "But there are other things . . ."  
  
"Like what, I seem to recall she is over Yue's other form . . . and if you think I'm that interested in her . . ."  
  
"Why not?" Syaoran looked up at him sharply.  
  
"I have . . . someone else." Eriol smiled secretly, and began to eat again.  
  
Syaoran stared at him, the night was beginning to draw near again, and the kitchen was filled with the glow of the twilight. After a minute or two of contemplation, he guessed quietly. "Tomoyo."  
  
Eriol's lavender grey eyes flickered up, and stared at his distant relative. Syaoran stared back. Eriol nodded quietly. "Do you know why I like you so much Syaoran?"  
  
"You *like* me?" Syaoran raised a teasing eyebrow; "I'd hate to think what you would do to me if you hated me."  
  
Eriol laughed slightly, "You're the brother I should have had . . ."  
  
The two stared at each other, Syaoran's face softened slightly in understanding, before Eriol, or possibly Clow, continued mockingly, " . . .or at least tormented, during our childhood . . ."  
  
The two distant relatives chuckled and continued their meal.  
  
  
  
One hour and forty minutes later, Spinel and the Mirror had descended the stairs so Spinel could sleep in preparation for his shift and Mirror reluctantly left Touya to ask his sister if she could remain out of the book a while longer.  
  
Touya looked up from fluffing Kero's pillow to glance at Nakuru, she was looking out of the window. Her scarlet silk nightgown fluttered slightly with the breeze. Keroberos coughed and shivered.  
  
"Akizuki? Close the window, it's too cold at night for him."  
  
Nakuru sighed and closed the window. She sat heavily on the bed, "Why don't you like me?" She stared at him in slight sadness.  
  
He decided an honest answer would be better. "You try to push Yuki out of my life."  
  
"Oh . . . I . . ." Nakuru looked at her hands, "So you don't like me at all?"  
  
Touya got up and sat by her, "I don't like you trying to replace Yuki . . . but . . . I guess I like you."  
  
"Do you like me like me or like me love me?" she said brightly.  
  
"Like you like you." He said dryly.  
  
Nakuru pouted playfully, then turned serious, "Oh . . . with Yukito . . . is it like him like him or is it-"  
  
"Like him love him." Touya admitted quietly.  
  
"Does he know?"  
  
"I don't know."  
  
Nakuru squeezed his shoulder, "You should tell him."  
  
"Maybe . . ." Touya decided to change the subject. "How old are you?"  
  
Nakuru smirked, "Much older than you."  
  
"How much so? A century?"  
  
She grinned, "I'm not telling."  
  
"What about Eriol?"  
  
"Sorry, that would be telling too." She pulled up her knees.  
  
Touya stared at her profile for a few moment, "Do you like him?"  
  
"He's my master."  
  
"That doesn't necessarily you have to like him."  
  
She considered this for a few moments, "I love him, and he's a very kind hearted boy if you can tolerate his . . . sense of humour."  
  
"Why did you bring him here?" Touya's head snapped towards Nakuru, as she suddenly turned very serious, and tried to swallow a dry sob. "What? What happened?"  
  
"We were so scared . . ." She admitted.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"A part of him is still Clow, so that means he still loves them a lot . . ." she gestured to Kero's sleeping form. "But we're still his guardians, we're supposed to protect him . . . it was so hard watching him worry day after day about something we couldn't protect him from. So we brought him here . . ."  
  
"Because he couldn't find a cure by himself." Touya understood the guardians' reasoning; "he could help get Kero better."  
  
She nodded, "and we wanted to help as well, they're the closet family we've got . . . Yue and Kero . . . Eriol and Spinel. That's all the family I have."  
  
"Well, if you count Clow Reed . . . then you can count my father in as well, so . . ." Touya closed one eye as he tried to figure it out. "I guess you can consider me a cousin."  
  
"Really?"  
  
Touya shrugged, "yeah."  
  
"Thank you." She murmured as she slipped off the bed and sat by Kero, she pulled the blanket higher over Kero's shoulders. Touya glanced at the door; a warm snowy aura had just merged with a cool amethyst one, the aura's owner was just walking away from the door.  
  
Yue was awake again . . .  
  
. . .and he had heard the entire conversation.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
And now it's time for LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
DrM: Konnichiwa!! Where's Yue?  
  
Firey: Damnit! How could you?!  
  
DrM: Nani?  
  
Firey: Do you know what it's like to in the book with Mirror after she's had a dose of Tooooo-Yaaaaa?  
  
DrM: Anything similar after I've had a dose of Yue or Clow? [Goes starry eyed, Tomoyo-style] Haaaayyyaaaaannnn. . .  
  
Firey: [sighs] Great . . . now she's at it too. [Gets handed a piece of paper] What's this?  
  
Off-screen type guy: It's today's script!  
  
Firey: [presses script against butt, script bursts into flames] Today's script can kiss my sweet ass! [Sighs] Look, all the readers gotta know is that if they don't R I'm gonna come *sit* on them!  
  
DrM: Firey! We don't threaten the readers, it ain't nice!  
  
Firey: I'll give you damn *nice*! [Gets tackled by Mirror]  
  
DrM: Thank you Mirror, you remain my favourite card!  
  
Mirror: [giggles and curtsies then drags Firey off the screen]  
  
DrM: That's it for another chapter, please R&R! Hon na na!  
  
[P.S. a quick side note to Nakuru: Me? Apologise? NEVER!] 


	7. And it’s your shift I believe . . .

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be!  
  
Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
  
  
Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat.  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
  
  
Part Seven: And it's your shift I believe . . .  
  
[warning: chapter has a slight bit of OCC!! I'm really, really sorry!!]  
  
  
  
Another morning was born; Syaoran and Meilin trudged down the stairs in search of some food and to find out who would be Keroberos' new nurses.  
  
"Take my name out please!" Requested Syaoran gruffly as he shrugged out of the jumper, "I just had two shifts!"  
  
"I agree," said Tomoyo and quickly searched through the list of names. Meanwhile Touya and Sakura brought the morning's breakfast. "Good morning!" Said Sakura brightly. "Did Kero wake up at all last night?"  
  
Meilin yawned and then answered "Not really . . . But we did have an interesting conversation."  
  
"Hoe?" Sakura blinked in surprise, "You and Syaoran?"  
  
"No. . ." Meilin smile tiredly, "The sponge toy and me." Syaoran snorted with laughter as Meilin chuckled. During the night Kero's fever had hiked up again to the point where he was having a delusion about puddings, he was telling Meilin, thinking she was a five foot high slice of Mississippi mud pie, with an extra serving of whipped cream, that he was very deeply in love with her, and that he couldn't wait until they consummated the relationship. Syaoran had managed to keep a very straight face, given the circumstances he was actually intensely proud of himself, as he was telling her to ". . . Play along! We don't want to aggravate his condition by letting him get agitated!"  
  
As Touya was setting the plates down, Touya stepped out of the kitchen carrying another tray.  
  
Meilin and Syaoran rubbed their bleary eyes, and stared mutely at the two Touyas. Syaoran sighed sharply, "Let me guess, Eriol tried to get the Twin card to do something for him. . ."  
  
Eriol laughed as he poured himself another cup of tea, Tomoyo shook her head, "No," she confided in them quietly, "They're playing a joke on ruby moon."  
  
The two Touyas winked and turned back into the kitchen, "Touya! Mirror! It was funny the first time!" Nakuru yelled in the kitchen, "Now it's just mean!! No, wait . . . it wasn't even funny the first time! It's *always* so mean!!"  
  
The group chuckled quietly, as Yuki strode into the room, "Yukito!" Cried Sakura happily, "Konnichiwa!"  
  
"Why isn't anyone watching Keroberos?" He snapped irritably.  
  
"Good morning Yue," said Eriol, as he blew the surface of his tea.  
  
Yukito sighed sharply and stood with his arms folded. If it wasn't for the lack of hair, the glasses, that cute snow bunny-ness that Yuki always had, he could have easily passed for Yue. "Why isn't anyone watching Keroberos?" He demanded again.  
  
"Because we were just about to draw today's lots." Said Tomoyo as she pulled two new slips of paper out of hat. "We've decided that we need to extend the shifts so the first two that will be working today's first four hour shift will be. . ."  
  
  
  
The clock seemed to tick much louder in Sakura's room. The silence was so heavy the Sakura cards actually started to accuse the silent card of acting without permission from the mistress. Two pages from two books were turned at the exact same time. Two loud sighs were emitted at the exact same time.  
  
"Will you stop doing that?!" Two irritated guardians snapped at each other at the exact same time, "And that too!" Both Yue and Spinel mirrored each other as they shook their heads, sighed harshly again and returned to their books.  
  
A cough from Keroberos interrupted the silence. The unhealthy lion tried to roll on his back but was prevented by a large pillow. Kero yawned as his eyes creaked open. He woke up to the same sight he had been waking up to every . . . //have I been waking up everyday?// he thought hazily. He suddenly felt a little scared, he couldn't remember the last time he woke up, only the name of his brother floated to his consciousness.  
  
"Yue . . .?" His throat was dry; his lips had stuck together after days of non-use.  
  
A soft breeze caressed the fur on top of his bare head, //where's my helmet?// he thought as Yue's angular features floated horizontally upside down, "Keroberos?" He asked quietly. His fringe brushed on the floor while he floated over his brother.  
  
Kero smiled sluggishly, and Yue's eyes betrayed a softness he didn't allow to be seen very often. "You okay?" Yue asked.  
  
Kero tried to roll on to his front; Yue landed softly and allowed his wings to disappear. "Stay there," he said.  
  
"I want to get up . . ." Kero shakily tried to raise himself off the ground. A warm pressure under his stomach pushed him upright. Spinel called, "let him sit up!"  
  
Kero looked between his forepaws to see the midnight blue panther's head supporting him. "You're here too?" Asked Kero.  
  
Once Kero was sitting up, Yue sat beside him one long arm draped around Kero's back, ready to take the pressure when Kero would start to feel giddy. Spinel sat the other side.  
  
"But you two hate each other . . ." Kero looked from Spinel to Yue and back again.  
  
"Stop moving your head so fast!" Yue snapped quietly, "You'll make yourself sick!"  
  
"Are you two friends now?"  
  
"No!" Came the doubled hasty retort.  
  
Kero yawned. "I'm hungry . . ." he announced, Spinel looked past him at Yue, the moon guardian glared back.  
  
"Fine then, I'll be getting the food . . ." and with that, Spinel padded out of the room.  
  
As soon as Spinel had left, Kero's shoulders slumped and he slid against Yue. His eyes were closed again, and he could feel sleep trying to get him again. Keroberos frowned and shook his head; he didn't want to go to sleep again.  
  
"If you're tired, go back to sleep . . ." Yue murmured gently. Kero pulled his eyes open, and stared searchingly at his brother's profile. Yue was pale. Much paler than he was usually, his usually perfect features betrayed tiredness; his eyes were red-rimmed meaning he had been crying a lot. Kero frowned slightly, he'd only ever seen Yue cry twice. The first time had been after Kero burnt Yue's fringe to the length it was now, the second, after Clow had died and they had sat together and cried into each other's shoulders. Kero looked instinctively at Yue's lips, when the angel was upset his lips always suffered. Yue's lips were dry, and the bottom one was nicked with little cuts.  
  
"You've been biting your lip again, Yue . . ." Kero frowned; it was a habit he thought Yue had kicked. As if the mere mention of his tendency was a trigger, Yue sucked his bottom lip in again and started to chew.  
  
"Yue!" Kero murmured disapprovingly.  
  
Yue paused long enough to utter, "I can't help it."  
  
Kero sighed and rested his head against Yue's shoulder. "I bet your nervous twitch has returned with avengeance . . ."  
  
"Has not!" Yue leaned his head on Kero's.  
  
Kero snickered. "Bet it has!" He teased. "Should I be warning Sakura not to let you near the library?"  
  
"Urusei."  
  
Kero snickered again. "So which system will you be starting with? The numbers or the alpha-aaa—aaa---"  
  
Yue lifted his head of Kero's, and looked at the weak lion, "Kero?"  
  
Kero tried lift his head; it felt as if it weighed a lot. "Yue . . ." he murmured weakly, "I'm so tired . . ."  
  
Yue shifted to sit on his heels in front of his brother, he grasped the lion's golden shoulders to steady him, "Can you stay awake for some food? You haven't eaten in so long . . ."  
  
Kero opened his mouth to reply, then closed it as his head started to swim again, he could feel his legs giving way again. He raised his heavy head to look at Yue once more, and wished there was something he could say to make the fear disappear from the angel's catlike eyes.  
  
The last thing Kero was aware of was Yue's amethyst eyes widen with shock, and Yue's voice call out with horror as he pitched forward, unable to support his heavy body anymore and feeling terrible about the pain he was causing Yue.  
  
"KEROBEROS!"  
  
  
  
Yue's frightened call made Spinel drop the bag of biscuits Tomoyo had left in case Kero woke. He ran up the last few remaining steps, and burst into the room, he found Yue holding a very unconscious Keroberos. Yue had his eyes sealed shut and was biting his lip so hard that he had started to bleed.  
  
"Yue . . ." Spinel nudged the guardian; he was surprise to realise that Yue was actually trembling. Touya burst into the room.  
  
"What happened?!" Spinel looked over his shoulder at the panting boy, just behind him the mirror girl stood, concern written all over her face. She rushed forward, "Yue-sama!"  
  
As Touya and Spinel gently made Keroberos comfortable, the Mirror tried to get Yue to sit down. The guardian was trembling even more now, his lip bleeding slightly heavier now, and his normally cool eyes were wide and clearly upset. The Mirror didn't know what to do. The guardian was the one that protected her, and after the Mistress; he was the one she had to obey. //The mistress?// the Mirror thought, she stepped out the room as her thought lead her to a possible way to help Yue, //the Master Clow Reed. . . the Master's reincarnation!//  
  
She ran down the stairs and tip-toed into the living room, the room was darkened by the curtains, pulled closed to keep the morning's sunlight out. She moved over each of the sleeping bodies to see which one was the master's reincarnation.  
  
"Mirror?" A shiver ran down her back as she heard a younger echo of the Master Clow Reed's voice.  
  
"Gomen, Hiirawagizawa-sama . . . but . . ."  
  
"It's Yue isn't it?" The young boy sat up and placed his glasses on his face. "Very well," he whispered, "I will speak with him."  
  
  
  
The Mirror wasn't aware of it as they silently went up the stairs, but inside the mind of Hiirawagizawa Eriol, a conversation was taking place, one that had been repeated several times after Keroberos had first fallen asleep . . .  
  
  
  
"We have to tell them." Eriol stared out of the window, of his former life's study. It was Clow's favourite time of year, autumn. It lay between Keroberos' favourite of summer and Yue's of winter.  
  
"Tell them what?" Clow snapped, "I'm sorry Boys, I didn't accidentally die, I died on purpose, I could have saved myself but I was too selfish to even try."  
  
"It would be the truth." Eriol turned to look at his past life. Clow looked up from his tea.  
  
"Since when have you ever wanted to be truthful?"  
  
Eriol shook his head, "That was a low blow." He commented, Clow sighed and leant forward, after safely putting his cup on the low table, he pressed his white hands into his face.  
  
"I know . . ." he murmured through his hands, Clow rubbed his eyes once, before staring at Eriol, "I'm sorry. I'm worried about Keroberos."  
  
"I am too . . ." Eriol said as Clow stood, his long robes swishing silently, "but I'm also beginning to worry about Yue."  
  
Clow stood shoulder to shoulder with Eriol, facing the window. He was silent as he gazed at the window seat.  
  
"NO! Sit still!" A familiar voice commanded irritably. "You must sit still!"  
  
"But I'm bored and pappy's cooking!" Eriol turned, Clow had his hand outstretched, and the memory he commanded came to life. Yue and Keroberos were in the study; Yue's lanky form was sitting crossed legged on a large purple cushion, on the plush red rug. He was staring up at Keroberos, who was sprawled on the window seat. Keroberos was staring out the window, as Yue tried to sketch him. "Yue . . ."  
  
"Keep still!" Yue snapped, as Keroberos sighed and his tail moved again.  
  
Kero tried a different tactic, he tried to keep as still as a statue as he talked through his clamped teeth, "Yue! Pappy's cooking!" Keroberos' voice took on the high-pitched quality of his plush toy form, "Pappy's cooking Yue and he might be making cake!" Kero managed to keep very still as he dryly sobbed, "I'm missing cake! And I might be missing bowl licking! And cookie dough! And left over biscuit batter! And extra icing sugar! Cakeeee!"  
  
"Have some later!" Yue grumbled as he rubbed out Kero's tail and started again, he sighed sharply, "There's only the three of us here . . . what makes you think there won't be any left when I'm done drawing?"  
  
Kero's tail twitched again, as Keroberos grumbled, "You draw like you wash your hair . . . you take days!"  
  
Eriol smiled, as Clow stepped forward. The magician entered the memory, his black robes fading and turning into his flour-dusted cooking clothes and his favourite apron. Clow's face still retained his sadness, his melancholy over Keroberos' illness, as he approached the old memory. "What are you two doing?"  
  
Yue glanced up and blushed slightly, "We're . . . I mean, I'm trying to . . ."  
  
"Torture me to death with his non-finishing!" Keroberos yelled as he interrupted.  
  
"Keroberos!" Yue's eyes narrowed as he snapped, "That's not even a word!"  
  
"I'm the Guardian Beast of the Seal! I can make as many words up as I want!" Keroberos stuck his tongue out as Yue scowled. Yue's retort was frozen as Clow lifted his hand again. The dark haired magician crouched down by his moon guardian's frozen features. He peered over his spectacles as he pressed his fist against his chin in contemplation. Eriol stepped over to the frozen Keroberos, long pink tongue still extended mockingly, he stroked the underside of the lion's chin, more out of habit than anything else, and the guardian loved that. The dark haired boy looked at his other life, who stood. Clow nodded once, he glanced at Yue as he spoke.  
  
"Once this is all over, then I will tell them . . . until then . . ." Clow sighed again, "Quieten Yue down."  
  
Eriol nodded once, and turned to leave. He'd just reached the door when a thought occurred to him; he turned and called across the room. "What about Yue's . . .?"  
  
"Twitch?" Clow stood up and looked around his study's library. "Advise Sakura to lock Fujitaka's study, and then the basement, and then Fujitaka's bedroom." Clow paused and thought for a few moments, "On second thoughts . . . It would be a lot easier just to tell her to keep an eye on Yue, and not to let him near any books."  
  
  
  
After Eriol had calmed Yue down, the moon guardian cast one more look at his brother and then transformed away. Tomoyo, to start their shift, woke Sakura. When they got to her bedroom, they found Touya trying to coax Yue out of hiding.  
  
"It's no use Touya," said Yuki, wrapping his arms around his elbows. He turned and looked out the window, "He simply wants to be alone."  
  
Touya sighed, he shoulders dropped slightly, he turned and looked at Eriol. "Isn't there anything you can do?"  
  
The boy magician was sitting by Keroberos; shoulder leant against his own midnight blue guardian. He sighed and shook his head, "As I recall, when Yue wanted to be alone, we *left* Yue alone . . ."  
  
"Why?" Yukito asked, interested.  
  
"When in *that* frame of mind Yue was never adverse to throwing a few icicles at anyone . . ." Eriol glanced at Yukito, "That includes Clow . . ."  
  
Yukito's eyes widened as Touya nodded in understanding, "Oh . . ."  
  
"What's wrong?" Asked Sakura.  
  
"Keroberos woke up, then fainted, Yue went to pieces, and now is hiding in the snow rabbit, your big brother asking stupid questions . . . " Explained Spinel, " . . .And it's your shift I believe."  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
And now it's time for LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!  
  
DrM: Konnichi---- [is suddenly tackled, tied up and gagged by a white blur]  
  
Yue: [straightens Kero-chan type bowtie, and sits in Eriol's Throne of Evil] Hello, and welcome to the latest chapter's. . .  
  
  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
And now it's time for LEAVE IT TO YUE!!  
  
Yue: Konnichiwa, I am your host; Yue, moon guardian. Lately I have noticed that DrM's choice of co-hosts has been less than the perfection that *is* me, and because DrM has be portraying me so out of character it's almost wrong, so I have decided to take over the A/Ns to provide you, the readers, with some quality programming.  
  
DrM: [gagged] MMMmmmmmm!!! [Translation: NOOOOOoooooo!!]  
  
Yue: Quite . . .[raises eyebrow and continues] Anyway, as per tradition, here are the normal requests, please R&R, leave the usually demand to 'Free the Drop dead Gorgeous Moon guardian from the DrM's fics', or to at least given him more action with To-ya, and come back for the next chapter . . . [Puts hand over ear piece] which I'm being told is going up at the same time as this one . . . so I believe; I'll be seeing you at the next A/Ns. We finish today's instalment with a rendition of Thomas Hardy's 'Return Of the Native' . . .  
  
DrM: [gagged, eyes wide with fear] Mmmmmmmmmm!! [trans: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!]  
  
Yue: [adjusts Clow-like specs, and opens book] . . .and it's *not* the film version.  
  
DrM: [gagged] ARGMMMMMM!!! 0.o;;; 


	8. OH BY CLOW REED’S SOUL!! HE’S DEAD!!

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be!  
  
Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
  
  
Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat.  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
  
  
Part eight: OH BY CLOW REED'S SOUL!! HE'S DEAD!!  
  
[warning: chapter has a slight bit of OCC!! I'm really, really sorry!!]  
  
  
  
About a week later . . .  
  
"KEROBEROS!! OH BY CLOW REED'S SOUL!! HE'S DEAD!!"  
  
The yell resonated throughout the house, and everyone instantly reacted. Sakura was the first there, as she had used the jump card to leap up the stairs in one jump. She found Yue trembling outside her room, she hadn't seen him all week, the moon guardian, Yuki had said, was asleep the whole time. Now, he was standing out side the room, and pointing thru the door. "He's dead! He's dead! He's deaaaaad!" He whimpered, as he moved from one foot to the other.  
  
Sakura's eyes widened, Keroberos' fever had been dipping by all accounts he was getting better, the Clow cards under his protection had been trying there hardest to lean him their energy, everyone had been working around the clock. He was getting better! And now Yue said he was dead! Sakura staggered backwards and was caught be Syaoran.  
  
Tomoyo knelt beside the pair, and looked up at Touya. He nodded and walked into the room. The group unconsciously gathered closely, waiting for Touya to confirm what they feared.  
  
Touya walked back out of the room a few moments later. "Yue. . . C'mere." The dark haired boy wrapped an arm around the guardian's shoulders. "What is it you *exactly* classify as dead?"  
  
"Well. . ." Yue motioned into the room, "Look at him! His mouth is open, and his eyes are too, his legs are sticking in the air!"  
  
"Why?" Eriol asked Touya. Touya swung his head toward Eriol and raised an eyebrow. A really loud snore from inside Sakura's room conveniently answered the question.  
  
"He's dead all right. . ." Touya nodded, then swung his head around to Yue, "He's SLEEPING like the dead!"  
  
"Oh. . ." Yue's nervous jittering stopped, "But he looked dead!"  
  
Touya started to laugh at Yue's *slight* mistake; Tomoyo pressed a hand against her chest, and sighed. "Yue. . . don't do that. You scared us!"  
  
"But he looked dead!" Yue insisted.  
  
The group stood and made their way downstairs as Touya pulled Yue into the room. "Yue . . . let me show you how to check if he was really dead, okay?"  
  
  
  
Keroberos woke up during Meilin and Syaoran's shift later that day, Syaoran had gone down to the kitchen to make something for them to eat; Meilin was alone when Kero awoke. In fact; he sat up, straight as a bolt and cried, "I'm so hungry! Feed me! Feed me now!"  
  
"Hello sponge toy," Meilin worked hard not to show her glee at the fact he was awake.  
  
Keroberos stared at her dully; "You're not feeding me!"  
  
Meilin smiled and rose to her feet, "I'll go make you something."  
  
When she retuned, she had a large bowl of soup with her. "Here you go, sponge toy, the best chicken soup you will ever taste!"  
  
Keroberos lapped at the bowl once before pushing it away, "Yuck! Too hot!"  
  
"What?!"  
  
"It's too hot, and I'm sooooo hungry, make it colder!"  
  
She picked it up and walked out of the room, she returned a few moments later. "There, cooler."  
  
Again after one taste, he pushed it away, "Bleurck! Too cold!"  
  
She sighed and went to make it slightly warmer, Keroberos chuckled slightly as soon as he was sure she was gone. //Ahhh, it felt good to be awake again.// He rolled onto his back, and stared at the ceiling, he wondered how long he had been sick. He could still feel the illness, it made him slightly sluggish, and his nose was blocked. But he did know that he didn't feel bad enough that he was going to die. A warm aura rushed up the stairs and brushed against his senses like a warm spring breeze. "Sakura!" He purred as his mistress ran into the room.  
  
She leapt on him, and squeezed his neck tightly, "Kero-chan!" Kero sneezed slightly as she helped him up slightly. She piled pillows behind his back. He opted to lie on his side. He smiled at her.  
  
"Did I miss much?"  
  
She grinned, "No. . . But I missed you. How are you feeling?"  
  
"Oh, just a little listless . . . a bit slow, but I'll be fine." Sakura snorted with laughter, Kero raised an eyebrow, "Nani?"  
  
"Oh, you did miss one thing, it wasn't funny at the time, but Yue thought you were dead! He woke the whole household, yelling the house down that you were dead! And then Oniichan went in to check on you and found out that you were just sleeping!"  
  
"Eh heh heh!" Kero snorted, "That sounds like Yue!"  
  
"It does?"  
  
"Oh yeah, he has a slight habit of when he's slightly out of it, or doesn't get enough sleep, or too much sleep, he has a tendency to . . . over react." Kero thought of something, "By the way . . . you haven't let him near your library have you?"  
  
"No. . . why?"  
  
"Just don't let him near anywhere with books."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Yue . . ." Keroberos leaned back and put his paws on his stomach, ". . . has a twitch."  
  
"What kind of twitch?"  
  
"It's just a twitch. . ." Kero looked at her sincerely, "Just don't let him near any books." He nodded and smiled mysteriously.  
  
"Keroberos?" The two looked up to see Yue pop his head around the door, "Hello Mistress, Meilin wishes to talk to you about feeding Keroberos."  
  
As Sakura stood to answer Meilin, Keroberos called out, "And tell her I'm still hungry!" He turned his attention onto his brother, "Hullo Yu-eh!" Keroberos called out in an awful British accent.  
  
Yue smiled, "Don't you 'hullo Yu-eh' me, I was worried about you!"  
  
Kero chuckled as his brother drew closer.  
  
  
  
An hour later. . .  
  
"KEROBEROS!! OH BY CLOW REED'S SOUL!! HE'S DEAD!!"  
  
Yue's call ran through the house again, and once again Sakura was the first there, as she had used the jump card to leap up the stairs in one jump. She found Yue trembling outside her room. He pointed into the room again, "IjustwentouttogetaglassofwaterforhimandwhenIcameback. . ." He panicked. "HE WAS DEAD!!"  
  
"Are you sure?" Said Touya as he moved past his frozen sister.  
  
"Yes!" At his unconvinced look, Yue continued, again moving from one foot to the other, "No, really I checked this time! He's not breathing!"  
  
Touya once again was the one to check, and once again he strolled out the room and wrapped his arm around Yue's shoulders. "Yue. . . C'mere." As he led Yue into the room he called out behind him ". . .And the rest of you too."  
  
The group filed into the room silently, as Touya made sure all of them had a clear view of Keroberos. "Now Yue. . . while I commend you for checking to see Keroberos was breathing. . ." He crouched down near to the lion, "There are other things you should check for as well, a pulse for instance . . . or possibly this. . ." He jabbed his finger into Keroberos' stomach.  
  
The supposedly dead lion's cheeks puffed up . . . and then his face screwed up . . . and then the allegedly stone dead guardian burst into belly- heaving laughter. "BWHA HA HA HA!!" He sniggered as he opened his eyes, "Awwww . . . Yuuuuue! You should see your face! Oh ho ho hoho!" He continued to snigger, and kicked his feet under the blanket.  
  
"Keroberos!" Yue yelled. "That was NOT funny!!"  
  
Ruby snorted, "That was! He's right! You should see your face!"  
  
"No it wasn't, that was—"  
  
"No, wait!" Eriol held his hand up, "She has a point." he started to laugh.  
  
The group laughed, as Yue did something a little less childish than storming out in a big huff. He transformed away . . . in a big huff. The rest of the group chuckled as they left the room and explained what had just happened to Yukito, leaving Sakura and Keroberos alone.  
  
Sakura wiped her eyes as she crouched down by Kero, "That might have been funny, Kero but don't do it again . . . okay?"  
  
"Sure." Kero shrugged, "Sakura, can I have a cup of tea please?"  
  
She hopped up, "Of course Kero-chan! We're going to do *anything* to get you better!" She spun and walked out the door.  
  
"Anything, eh?" Kero said once he was sure no one was listening, "Hmmm . . ."  
  
He was ill, Sakura had just promised they . . . meaning the people downstairs . . . would do ANYTHING for him. . . she meant to help him get better, but that wasn't important. . . what was important was the fact. . . Kero reached out with his senses . . . Red: the Gozou, Green: the Gaki, Pale Violet: the best cake maker, Snow White/Amethyst: the best one to freak out, Cerulean: stuffy nosed Baka, Neon-pink: the god all-mighty annoying one, Ginger: the grumpy brother, Deep Purple: the Master's reincarnation and Pink: the mistress, both of the latter auras the most powerful magicians in the house. He grinned evilly as he mentally catalogued each aura of the people downstairs.  
  
"Anything . . . I like the sound of that . . ."  
  
  
  
"Who woulda ever thought Yue would break so easily?" Said Syaoran as he and Touya prepared dinner later that day. The two had had a couple shifts together, and while not on the best of terms yet, had discovered that they could actually hold an interesting conversation.  
  
"Well, some men get ready to meet challenges such as these," Touya remarked dryly, "They are strong, they are brave, composed in situations like this . . ."  
  
"KEH-ROOO-BEEEAR-ROSSSS!!" Yelled Yue again, "OH!! BY CLOW REED'S SOUL!! HE'S DEAD!!"  
  
Syaoran rolled his eyes as Touya continued, " . . . Yue isn't one of them."  
  
They joined the others, as they went to investigate the commotion, "Yue," said Sakura, "I'm sure he's just having you on again."  
  
Touya arrived, "Did you check for the things I told you to check?" He said as if speaking to some retarded child.  
  
"Yes!" Cried Yue indignantly, "Everything but the pulse thing, but when I stuck my finger into his stomach he didn't laugh!"  
  
Touya raised an unconvinced eyebrow as he entered the room; Keroberos was lying on his side, tongue lolling out of his mouth. He looked like a badly drawn cartoon character, a *dead* badly drawn cartoon character. Eriol moved forward, and his whole manner seemed to change, Sakura looked at him in surprise. "Clow?"  
  
Eriol looked over his shoulder and nodded silently. He crouched by Keroberos; he cocked his head to one side and folded his arms. "Keroberos!" He spoke rather pointedly, "Stop freaking your poor brother out like that!"  
  
Kero's eyes popped open, "I was just sleeping!" He said with an alertness that betrayed him, he forced a look of innocence on his face. "What? Why did you wake me? I was just sleeping, what? Why? What happened?"  
  
"I don't care," Eriol/Clow continued, "Just stop freaking your brother out like that, you'll give him an ulcer!"  
  
Yue stalked into the room, he grabbed Kero by the loose fur on his neck, and pulled him so close their noses were touching, "I hate you!" Yue hissed.  
  
Kero sniggered, and sucked in a large breath. Yue instantly let go of Kero's fur when he realised that Kero wasn't breathing out again. In fact his cheeks puffed out, and he made his eyes roll back. "Stop it!" Yue said, as Kero's head lolled back, "Stop it!" Kero began to swoon, Yue's head snapped toward Sakura, "Mistress! Tell him!"  
  
Sakura blinked in surprise, then turned to Kero, "Keroberos stop it!"  
  
Kero let his breath out loudly; "It's sooo worth it!" He panted, "Your face is priceless!"  
  
He sat up a bit more and drew a long tongue up Yue's anger face. Kero sniggered cheekily as Yue wiped the thick, oozing dribble off his face.  
  
Yue's eyes narrowed; "If you weren't ill . . ." he said and then stalked out the room.  
  
  
  
  
  
-------------------------------------------  
  
And now it's time for LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!!  
  
DrM: Konnichiwa!! Yes, you are reading right, I am back in control of the A/Ns, and it's all thanks to my new co-host, Spinel Sun.  
  
Spinel: All I did was stop him from reading that awful rendition . . . [Picks up the dreaded book] he was reading it all wrong, this is how it's supposed to be--- [is tackled by DrM, tied up and throw out of the room]  
  
DrM: Whoopies! It looks like that's all the time we have to spare! Please don't forget to R&R minna-chan! And for everyone who likes the Sakura card bits from chapter six, there will be a special appearance from them in chapter nine! Hon Na Na!! [Looks around] Does anyone know a good co-host agency? I do seem to get thru a lot of them . . . 


	9. Okay, well, putting that thought aside. ...

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be!  
  
Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
  
  
Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat.  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
  
  
Part Nine: Okay, well, putting that thought aside. . .  
  
  
  
Yue refused to visit Keroberos for the rest of the day; he also refused to return to his false form. So Touya and Syaoran were stuck with a grumpy guardian in the kitchen, as they were cooking. Yue watched Touya carry the washing back into the wash room, he turned his attention on Syaoran, "You do realise you're making that all wrong don't you?"  
  
"Oh really?" Said Syaoran as he slid the latest batch of chopped vegetables into the pan, "And how would you know?"  
  
"I'm older that the recipe, I know how to make it!" Yue closed his eyes and folded his arms.  
  
Syaoran leaned over the counter, "Oh, really? And how old's that?"  
  
"What's my age got to do with you making that soup all wrong?" Yue cocked his head to the side as he leaned towards the Clow descendant.  
  
"Why is it every time I ask how old Clow is, or Yue or Keroberos or anyone; everyone changes the subject?"  
  
"What has your inability to realise how old we are got to do with the fact you're making that soup all wrong?"  
  
"Brat-features gaki boy . . ." Touya sailed back into the kitchen, he glared at the two, "Whimpy moon guardian blokey . . .This soup is being made wrong, and as far as I figure Yue is 1000 years old . . ."  
  
"OI!" Yue and Syaoran both yelled.  
  
"This recipe has been in my family for generations . . ." Syaoran slammed his hands on to the counter, as Yue pushed his face into Touya's.  
  
"Does this face look like it's a thousand years old?!" The moon guardian spoke slowly as he narrowed his eyes threateningly.  
  
". . . and I'm making it perfectly!" Syaoran concluded.  
  
As Touya was attempting to dig himself out of the hole he had dug himself into with Syaoran and Yue, Ruby and Meilin traded fighting tips in the garden. They too had been on a couple of shifts together and had found quite a lot of common ground. While Ruby and Meilin bitched about Baka Syaoran, and Baka Touya, Tomoyo washed her hair. . . this was no mean feat! I mean. . . the girl had a couple *feet* worth of hair to wash. . .  
  
Sakura sat with Keroberos until he fell into a light slumber again. The lion had eaten quite a lot, considering he hadn't eaten anything substantial since Yue found him unconscious in the kitchen on that first night. Spinel, her shift partner, joined Keroberos in his light nap. Sakura went to look for Eriol, he'd disappeared clutching an old book, and she was curious. Spinel and Ruby had exchanged a knowing look as he had pulled the large book from his backpack.  
  
She slipped on a winter coat and made her way on to the roof. She found Hiirawagizawa sitting there his large robe's over coat wrapped around him, his hat lay beside him and he seemed unaware of everything as he turned the page and smiled. //A good memory,// Sakura thought, //I might be intruding . . .//  
  
Eriol blinked, and closed the book. He returned to the present as he looked over at Sakura, "Join me . . . please . . ."  
  
She slowly made her way over, "Gomen . . ." she murmured, "If you'd rather be alone . . ."  
  
"No . . ." He smiled at the book again, "You are their new master, and it would be nice to share some memories with you . . ."  
  
"Them?"  
  
"Yue and Keroberos." He murmured as he reopened the book. "This is the oldest book I have in my possession. It was Clow's diary."  
  
"Clow kept a diary?"  
  
"We . . . were a little forgetful . . . perhaps you've noticed it in our cards . . ."  
  
"I haven't" Sakura admitted.  
  
Eriol chuckled; "You've never wondered why I created a rain card, a storm card, and a cloud card? They all do the same thing . . ."  
  
"I thought it was because they did it in varying degrees of strength."  
  
"If that were true why didn't I create, in addition to the Sword card, a . . . pair of scissors card, or a knife card, or a shaving razor card, the pen-knife card or even the letter opening card . . ." Sakura laughed as he listed various types of blades Clow could have made into cards. He smiled at her, and turned his attention to the sunset. It was still cold, but the sunset had a certain charm to it. It reminded him of home.  
  
"So. . ." Sakura looked with interest at the book, "What did you write in there?"  
  
He opened the book to reveal orderly, neat inscriptions. Clow's spidery handwriting was kept in tidy lines, in the various entries. "At first," he stroked the page, "I was always very methodical, and I listed everything I had achieved that day, what I planned to do the next day. Which cards worked, which didn't. The ones I wanted to create and what I thought it would take to create it." He turned a small section of the yellowing pages, and Sakura realised that the diary was not just a year's worth of entries but several years. Eriol smiled as she gasped. "Like I said the oldest book in my possession." The pages he had revealed were covered with serious diagrams of imposing looking men and explanations. "Then I started to think about creating a set of guardians for my cards."  
  
Sakura pointed to a doodle of a lion in the corner of one page, "What's this?"  
  
"That would be Keroberos . . ." he chuckled, "I had gone to the zoo for some inspiration, and I had seen this lion, he was large and he was very scary, but then the zoo keeper appeared and fed him . . . the fearsome lion rolled onto his back like a kitten and purred."  
  
Sakura laughed, "That sounds like Keroberos." She pointed to a picture of a longhaired girl, "This is Yue?"  
  
"She was this adorable little girl, she had the longest blonde hair I've ever seen, and the bluest eyes, she lived next to me . . . I had . . ." Eriol trailed off and blushed, "I had the hugest crush on her . . ." he confessed.  
  
"So you based Yue on this girl?"  
  
"Mmm-hmm." Eriol nodded, "But don't tell him that . . . I told him he had been inspired when I was looking up at the moon one night."  
  
"Is that true at all?"  
  
"A little . . . I did glance up at the moon when I was on a date with this girl, and I made up my mind that he was going to be based on her . . ." he chuckled and turned another section of pages. As the pages turned, years seemed to pass; Clow's entries became a little less tidy. Eriol smiled, "While Yue and Keroberos grew up, I kinda stopped being so serious about everything . . ." the entries became scribbled, some were one lines that seem to stretch across the page, winding around small passages, some were just one worded reminders. "After a while, I would only write down the funniest things that had happened that day, I'd list what Keroberos and Yue had found out, what they had learned. What I wanted to teach them the next day . . ." He stopped when he came to a series of clips. The clips held some slips of paper to the book, and it was obvious that they had been handled several times.  
  
"What are they?" Asked Sakura, as Eriol unclipped them carefully, and handed them to her one by one. They were pictures . . . sort of. Evidently done with great relish. Paint was splattered all over the page, and the painter hadn't stayed with in the wobbly lines he had drawn himself. Eriol chuckled as he pointed at the picture, "This is our home . . ." he pointed to a wobbly bright green smudge, "This is Keroberos' favourite tree . . ." he chuckled as he pointed to a white blur in the sky, "This is Yue. . ." his finger slipped down to a black and blue and pink blotch, "This would be me. . . and this. . ." his finger slide over to an orange blob with a big wide grin, "This would be Keroberos."  
  
He turned the page over in her hands. In large backwards letters, was written . . . 'Fuor Pa-Py. Kehrobearoes beter drawerer!!' and was finished with a tiny paw print that Sakura recognised as Kero's smaller form's.  
  
"What does that say?" She asked.  
  
"It says 'For Pappy, Keroberos, better drawer.' Keroberos and Yue had a sort of thing about painting for me . . . that's why I never created the painting card."  
  
Sakura chuckled lightly, as Eriol pulled another picture out and handed it to her. It was much more restrained, and wasn't as sloppy as Keroberos' artistry, but still possessed a child's point of view of the world. The paper held various pencil sketches and each person was more recognizable. "This is Clow . . ." she pointed to one pencil sketch; it was very good. Clow was sitting at a window and was gazing thoughtfully out of it.  
  
"He insisted I sat very still for that one . . ." Eriol chuckled at the memory. "So I put the time card under his sign, he froze time for about three hours to draw it."  
  
"When Yue does something, he does it thoroughly." Sakura marvelled at the carefully drawn picture.  
  
"Indeed, Keroberos would have none of it though . . . he refused to stay in one place for very long." Eriol chortled again. He pulled out another picture. It was a sketch of Keroberos in his larger form and was again very good. The only problem was that it had been drawn over with another picture in orange paint, with large red English letters reading, 'Baka!! This is the really me! Baka, Baka, Baka!' Sakura laughed, "He did that to me as well!" As she ran her fingers over the bright orange paint, Eriol shuffled closer, he pulled out another picture, this one was absolutely perfect. She gasped as she took the perfectly watercolour picture of Clow, Yue and Keroberos. "This is one I created." Eriol said; he brushed the sheet lightly, running his fingers lovingly of the faces of his creations.  
  
"Clow painted this?"  
  
"No," Eriol laughed, "I could never paint very well; I always got impatient when it took so long. I created it with magic . . . a sort of painted photograph."  
  
This picture had the three sitting together under a tree; Clow had a hand on Yue's shoulder and a hand on the small of Keroberos' back. Kero was stretched in front of them, and Yue was leaning on Keroberos, his arms wrapped around Kero's neck. "They look so happy," Sakura remarked. Eriol stared at the picture, he smiled and nodded. "Of course, this isn't an absolutely honest picture . . ."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Clow could never get the two to sit like that, so it was concocted out of his own imagination."  
  
Sakura laughed, "That's cheating!"  
  
  
  
  
  
As the evening drew into night, Sakura agreed to have another shift, this time with Meilin. The two settled down close to Keroberos. He was still wide-awake by eleven, and still asking for food. He was just guzzling his fourth helping of jelly and ice cream [he claimed it soothed his sore throat] down when Sakura remarked, "You must be getting very well . . . the ability to eat a lot is always a good sign that you are healthy."  
  
Keroberos looked up at her suddenly, groaned loudly and pushed the plate away, "Ooooh! I feel terrible, I can't eat anymore!!"  
  
"I never thought I'd hear that out of you, sponge toy!" Meilin crossed her arms sceptically.  
  
Keroberos rolled over and clutched his head, "I have a headache! Sakura make her talk quieter! She's making my head hurt worse!"  
  
"I am not!"  
  
"OOOWWWW!!!" Keroberos howled. "Ow! Ow! Her voice is really bad!!"  
  
"I have a beautiful voice!!" Meilin cried indignantly.  
  
"Okay," Kero rolled and sat up and stared at her, "Well . . . putting *that* thought aside . . ."  
  
Meilin's head jerked back in surprised, she jumped to her feet and grabbed the rejected bowl and stormed down the stairs to wash it up.  
  
  
  
As Meilin stormed into the kitchen, fourteen Sakura cards sat on the living room's windowsill, and thanks to the Little card, went unnoticed. They were gathered there because the older cards wanted to get some sleep, and they were a little restless. So they decided a slumber party on the 'sill was needed. They were all in their favourite pyjamas, hair set in rollers, and wings tips tied in bows, finger- and toe-nails getting the ritualistic painting. Popcorn and several bottles of wine were provided thanks to the Create card, with the strict understanding that the cards go *somewhere else* and drink it. They were in a line on the hard surface, some lying on their stomachs, some floating on some bubbles from the Bubble card, others on soft clouds provided by the Cloud.  
  
"No, *trust* me, that's him." Said the Sleep, as she blew the wet paint on her fingers.  
  
The Fight card, who was getting her hair plaited by the Shot, frowned, "No way . . ."  
  
"Yes way!" Cried the bubbles, as she popped some more popcorn into her mouth. She pointed at Touya, "That's him all right!"  
  
"No way!" The Arrow, pouring the fifth round of wine, squinted at him, "What does Mirror see in him . . .?"  
  
"Could be the eyes . . ." speculated the Glow, as she fluffed her pom-pom hair ties, "They do look like the master Clow reed's . . ."  
  
"I dunno why you don't get it," the Mist sighed, and rolled the last roller into her long hair, "The guy's *more* than kinda yummy looking . . ." she giggled as Touya stretch back and folded his arms behind his head, "He can return me to any form he likes."  
  
"Oh I get it!" Cried the Cloud as she passed the bowl of popcorn to the Sweet, "Only cards that have tried to *kill* him find him good looking!" She turned to the sweet, "Sweetie-darling, can you . . .?"  
  
"Oh sure," The Sweet waved her wand over the bowl, "What about Yue's other form? He's really tasty!"  
  
The Firey rolled her eyes, and gestured with her arms, "Okay, well, putting *that* thought aside . . ."  
  
"You only say that 'cause you have a thing for Keroberos . . ." the Flower folded her arms, and then accepted a glass of wine from arrow. Her long curly hair was down from its usual ponytails; she was lying on her back on one of bubbles' bubbles.  
  
"That's *so* untrue!" Protested the Firey, as the Song took her card form's pose and pretended to gag behind her.  
  
"Eww . . . Keroberos?!" The Song sniggered, then squealed as she sang, "Goodness gracious great *hair* balls of fire!!"  
  
The cards burst into laughter as Firey folded her arms in embarrassment. The Little thought about that for a few moments and then screwed up her face, "Ewwww!" she took of her bi-pronged hat and pretended to hurl in it, "Now that's an image I didn't want to carry around with me . . . FOR THE REST OF *EXISTENCE*!!"  
  
"Okay, well, putting *that* thought aside." Mimicked the Voice card, her hair was piled on top of her head. It wobbled slightly as she talked and she had to keep a hand on it to stop it from toppling down. "What about the master's reincarnation?"  
  
"You can NOT be serious!" The Fight card called to her, "That would be like *incest* or something!"  
  
"Ewww!! Stop it!" The Little card clutched her head, "This is soooo gross!"  
  
"Okay, not the master's reincarnation . . ." said the Shot, she had finished plaiting Fight's hair and now Fight had turned to paint Shot's nails, as always she was speaking in her double time way ". . . But what about that Little Wolf guy from Hong Kong? Let's just say, he moves fast and I've chased him, let me just tell ya . . . I've seen his Little Wolfy tush in action," she looked appreciatively at Syaoran, "Mmmm mmm mmmm! And it looks gooooood!"  
  
"That Gaki?!" Firey spoke up then threw her hand up as if to stop the thought right there, "Ewww! Not even option!"  
  
"But that's okay . . ." said the Song card, ". . .Because you're into bestiality!"  
  
"EWWWW!!" The cards screamed again, then laughed their heads off.  
  
"Okay, can we stop with the icky images?" The Little cried out, "Or I'll call Big and we're aaaallll going home."  
  
"Party pooper . . ." murmured the Arrow card, as she downed her sixth glass of wine.  
  
The cards quietened down, as Tomoyo entered the room. "Oh! OH! I like her," the Song card jumped up, "She's really good!"  
  
"Oh, yeah she has a really nice voice!" Said the Voice card.  
  
"I'm right, aren't I?" The Cloud sat up, "When we've tried to harm a person, we really like them . . . I mean, Mist and Mirror have the hots for Yo-yo-man, Shot can't get *enough* of Syaoran's ass, Song and Voice got it bad for that purple haired girl . . . and Firey's . . ." the Cloud broke off and swung her head towards Firey, ". . . Firey's just strange!"  
  
Firey's mouth fell open, as she glared at the Cloud. "C'mere puffball," she beckoned with a flaming finger, "Let me evaporate you!"  
  
  
  
Later that night, Yukito creped up the stairs, Yue had finally gotten tired and had gone to sleep. It was about four in the morning, and Yuki had woken up alone in the kitchen, with a scrunched up piece of paper in his hand. It was a note from Touya telling Yuki that when Yue stopped being stubborn, to come up stairs and get into bed. Yue had evidently snubbed Touya's offer and obstinately remained downstairs. He carefully stepped past Sakura's room; a light from under the door showed that whoever was on watch tonight was still awake. He paused, and slowly opened the door. Nakuru looked up from her magazine. She nodded to him silently, and smiled. Yukito stepped in, "How's it going?"  
  
"Oh, it's fine thanks," said Nakuru quietly. She nodded her head towards her partner; "She fell asleep about twenty minutes after Keroberos."  
  
Mirror murmured and shifted in her sleep, Yukito laughed softly and sat beside Nakuru, "Would you like some company then?"  
  
Nakuru reached over a big bowl of popcorn for a glass of water and offered some to Yukito, who held up his hand. "No thanks."  
  
She smiled and poured for herself, she sipped the drink and looked at him contemplatively, "You look tired."  
  
"Yue's form is a little hard to maintain." He murmured quietly.  
  
She nodded, "I get that way too." She looked at Keroberos briefly and made her decision, "Touya's waiting for you . . ." at his surprised look, she smiled again, "I'll be fine, go get some sleep."  
  
He got up and drifted toward the door, he paused and looked back at her, she pulled the bowl of popcorn into her lap, and picked up her magazine. "Thank you" he murmured softly.  
  
She looked up at him, "Go . . . before I change my mind, make you stay here by tying you up, gagging you and jump into bed with Touya myself."  
  
He smiled and disappeared from the doorway. Nakuru shook her head; Keroberos' sickness must have made her sick too, "Sick in the head." She muttered before throwing a sugary piece of popcorn in to her mouth. She was passing up an opportunity to sleep with Touya . . .  
  
  
  
  
  
-----------------------  
  
And Now It's Time For LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!!  
  
DrM: Konnichiwa!! I'd like to introduce my new co-host . . .  
  
Nakuru: [reads last line] NO WAY!! RE-WRITE THAT LAST PARAGRAPH!! RIGHT NOW!!  
  
Touya: LEAVE IT!! DON'T LISTEN DRM!! [Wraps arms around DrM] I'll love you forever and ever and ever and ever . . .  
  
Yuki: I thought you said you'd love me forever and ever and ever and ever!!  
  
Touya: [Wraps one arm around DrM and Yuki] Yuki, love, I said I'd love *you* forever and ever and ever and ever AND EVER!  
  
Nakuru: Hey! What about me?  
  
Touya: [Wraps an arm around Nakuru as well] I won't love you for as long as everyone else but I still love you.  
  
DrM: Touya? Since when did you have three arms? [Touya fritzes and turns into the Illusion card] Okay . . . that was the freakiest thing I've ever seen . . . anyway, sorry for the delay, my college hols have finished so . . . [sniffs] So fanfics will be updated over longer periods . . . but on the bright side, the title of this chapter comes from the Song card Episode (which I've just seen for the first time), where Kero keeps dismissing Meilin, [laughs] He's SOOOO cute!! It's turning into one of my favourite episodes!! As for all the requests in the latest reviews, I'm going to try and start including a little more S+S, can't say it'll take over the whole fic but there will be more, as for Mirror and Touya . . . hmmm . . .  
  
Mirror: Oh, Please! Oh, Please! Oh, Please! Oh, Please!  
  
DrM: I'll think of it . . . anyway, Please Do R&R!! And thank you if you already have, and feel free to do it again!! Hon Na NA!! 


	10. What Did You Do To Tick Yue Off This Tim...

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be!  
  
Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
  
  
Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat.  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
  
  
Part Ten: What Did You Do To Tick Yue Off This Time?  
  
  
  
"Hey Sweet?"  
  
"Urghhhh?"  
  
"Could you give me a hand here?" The Flower card struggled as she tried to pick the Little card up.  
  
"Urrrgggghhh! I'm sorry to inform you . . ." the Sweet held her head in both her hands and winced, "The card you once knew as the Sweet card has now departed this life . . ."  
  
The morning came too early for the Sakura cards that had been sleeping the living room windowsill. Not one of them felt capable of flight so Arrow had to fire an arrow up at Sakura's bedroom window, with a rope attached to it because Little was fast asleep still.  
  
"Why the hell can't we wake her up?" Firey pressed her hand against her forehead, for the first time in a really long time her head band was just a little too tight.  
  
A lot of heads swivelled toward Sleep, who tilted her head and rested a hand on her hip, "Bite me . . . I can't help it if she sleeps too close to my sleeping bag."  
  
Twelve other sets of eyes rolled and twelve other heads shook in annoyance as they turned their attention back to the rope.  
  
"Tell me again . . ." Flower broke off as she winced, "Why aren't I under the moon's influence, bloody sunlight!" she muttered before she yelled, "Why aren't we using the stairs?"  
  
The Cloud joined her, much to the annoyance of everyone else, yelled even louder, "Who's ingenious idea is it that we climb up a *rope* to the mistress' bedroom?"  
  
"Well, we can't wake stupid Little so we can't just walk up the stairs, ya freakin' airhead!!" Fight screamed back at her. The cards scowled at each other, each having to contend with splitting headache and the effects of consuming entirely too much popcorn.  
  
  
  
While thirteen *really* hung over cards argued below, and the little dreamed on . . .  
  
"So what are thy thoughts upon this delectable situation, sister? Shallt we leave them for a few moments?" The Dark rested her chin on her hand as she rested an elbow on the mistress' bedroom windowsill. The Light mirrored her sister's pose, "Thee knowth me too well sister. We shallt indeed leave them . . . at least until they are half way up the rope, or until one of them figure out that they could have just sent Cloud up to fetch Big, or indeed the Fly . . . which e'er comes first!" The two cards laughed and returned to their card forms. As they drifted back towards the book they paused, "What about the Mirror, should we be waking the child up?"  
  
The Dark card smiled, and nudged her sister towards the book; "Let's leave the little reflection to her true love's dreams."  
  
A sneeze woke the Mirror up, which was a real pity because she was having a dream about Touya and they were at the beach, and he was just coming out the surf, and she was going to reapply the sun cream 'cause she would want her adorable mister To-ya to get all sunbur—  
  
She blushed as she realise that she probably had a huge grin plastered to her face. She blushed even more when she found Nakuru staring speculatively at her. Nakuru smiled and then nodded.  
  
"Nani?" The little girl said as she grabbed a hairbrush that *He* had leant her, she started to brush her hair quickly. She turned away to face her true form's mirror, hoping to conceal the blush that was getting brighter and brighter, greener and greener.  
  
Nakuru chuckled, "You were thinkin' about Kinomoto weren't you?"  
  
The little girl's brushing slower and stopped as she stuttered, "N-n-n-n- no. No, why would you think about that?"  
  
"Oh . . ." Nakuru nodded knowingly, "I look like that in the morning too, especially after ones where he's naked, encased in a pit of strawberry flavoured jelly and I'm the only one that can dig him out . . ." she sighed theatrically, ". . .with nothing but my bare hands and my mouth." She wiped a fake tear from her eye as she sighed again, "It's a hard job but . . ." she shook her fist as if resolved to the task, ". . .someone's gotta do it . . ."  
  
The Mirror's mouth fell open, as she turned around slowly, to gaze at the red haired individual, who put her hands on her hips and cocked her head, "Don't tell me you've never had *that* fantasy?!"  
  
The Mirror's mouth still hung wide open as she shook her head. Nakuru wrapped a sisterly arm around her small shoulders, "My dear sweet Mirror card. . . Darh-ling you are simply not in the same league of having a crush on him until you've had *that* fantasy about that boy . . ."  
  
  
  
While Nakuru was corrupting the mirror card. . .  
  
"Good morning Yuki. . ."  
  
"Ohayo To-ymmmmm!!" Yukito barely got the words out before Touya rolled on top of him and pressed his lips hard against the snow-bunny's lips. Yuki's eyes slid shut and he giggled lazily as he wrapped his arms around the dark haired boy. It had been a while since they. . .  
  
. . . and it was going to be a while longer, as Yukito's consciousness faded away from him, and Yue took his place. Touya wasn't really aware of it until he kissed down the pale being's neck, and then for some reason started to choke, he brought his head up and spat out at least (what he felt was) half a wing's worth of feathers. "Blearck!"  
  
Yue gasped, "And what's wrong with my wings?!"  
  
"Yue?" Touya's head jerked in surprise.  
  
"You were, perhaps, expecting—"  
  
"The snow bunny? Yes!" He interrupted irritably.  
  
Yue's face betrayed a quick disappointed look, before he said icily, "Fine! I have to check on Keroberos . . ." he eyed Touya coolly, "I'll return your precious snow bunny-wunny when I'm finished."  
  
Touya sighed and rolled off him, as the half dressed moon guardian rolled off the bed, Touya sat up. "Look, I'm sorry but you surprised me." Yue silently pulled on his leggings, pointedly ignoring him. Touya sat behind him and wrapped his arms around Yue's waist, "Yue . . . You know I love it when you pop in. . ." He murmured seductively into the white haired being's ear. Yue turned his head slightly and glared at him. "You surprised me . . . you could at least give me some kind of warning before you two swap places."  
  
"What kind of warning would you like?" Yue asked sweetly, "Some kind of fax? A telephone call perhaps? An advert on TV?" Yue gasped mockingly, "Oh, I know! A Good Year blimp over the American Super Bowl tournament!!"  
  
Touya raised an eyebrow, "Yue . . . I said I was sorry."  
  
Yue nodded, "Maybe something a little less prominent . . . how about I just have Yukito jump up suddenly, throw off all his clothes and do the Saturday night fever dance, yelling 'Warning! Warning! Being about to transform! Warning! Yue is about to enter the building!' ?!"  
  
"Yue, now you're just being silly . . ."  
  
"Am I?" Yue's eyebrow twitched, "Am I *reeeeeally*?" He stood, and picked up his waistcoat, "And there I thought I was being helpful . . . I mean, you're right . . ." he stood in front of Touya, he had buttoned the waist coat, and was now standing with his hands on his hips, "You're absolutely right, it's not like the transformation is warning enough, I mean it does only last for one whole minute and thirty seconds, and that glowing ice blue magic circle beneath my feet isn't exactly visible, and the whole Yue- sized cocoon of . . ." he tugged at one of his wings, ". . .*huge* white wings, floating two feet off the ground effect. . . isn't *that* obvious? And that gusting magic wind, that moves around me and that Blue circle at gale force speeds, I mean no-one within five feet would notice something like that now–-" he grabbed his coat and shawl, he stood at the door and grasped the handle, "--WOULD THEY?!" He yelled as he slammed the door.  
  
Touya rolled his eyes and ran after the irate guardian . . .  
  
  
  
While Touya was trying to sort out his lover's tiff with Yue. . .  
  
"Ohayo Sakura!" Syaoran smiled as he came into the room, he'd had a really nice dream last night, it was all about Sakura, and he had told her that he loved her, and she had laughed, but in that sweet way that she had, and then she had said that she was really happy that he did because she loved him too, and then he had wrapped his arms around her and kissed her and nuzzled her neck, murmuring that he loved her some more and she giggled even more and wrapped her arms around him and---  
  
He paused in the mental recitation of his dream, because Sakura had turned, and blushed and giggled. His first response was to look down at his clothes . . . he was fairly sure he had dressed that morning. He wasn't in his boxers so he assumed his hair was sticking up at unnatural angles. A quick look into the reflected surface of the window proved that he had remembered to brush his hair. "Nani?" He said quietly, he was slightly curious about the nature of her strange behaviour. It was the type of behaviour he remembered seeing when she receive a compliment from Yukito when she was ten. She blushed adorably, he had decided this fact a long time ago, and she didn't quite meet his eyes as she stepped forward. He was still confused when she stepped closer to him, quickly looked up into his eyes, and then leant upward on her tiptoes. She brushed a soft butterfly kiss on his cheek, giggled and then whispered, "Ohayo." She smiled gently, and then turned back to the breakfast she was preparing.  
  
He was stunned, he was more than stunned, he was—  
  
"KAWAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIII!!!!" Tomoyo's excited voice squealed happily.  
  
"To-Tomoyo-chan?!" Sakura spun towards the kitchen door, Tomoyo was happily filming away.  
  
Tomoyo stepped into the room her dreaded camcorder still on, "I had hoped to record 'Early bird Sakura-chan makes breakfast for hungry fellow medical helpers during the Kero-chan Crisis!' but I got something much better!"  
  
Syaoran blinked, he wasn't entirely sure of what was going on. "Ano. . ." he glanced at Sakura who blushed and looked down. Tomoyo looked as if she was going to burst, but she sighed sharply as the two made no further motions towards each other, "Very well, *I* shall make breakfast, Sakura you and Syaoran will go outside and discuss this!"  
  
"Ano. . . ano. . . Tomoyo-chan!" Sakura tried to protest as Tomoyo shoved them out of the patio doors. She slid the door shut as soon as Syaoran stumbled out after Sakura, when he tried to open the door, Tomoyo waved the key, and the curtains quickly slid shut.  
  
"Sakura. . . I. . . you. . ." Syaoran started; as he turned he found Sakura had started to shiver. Without thinking he put his arms around the girl, unlike him, she hadn't gotten completely dressed she was only in her nightgown and some cute silken pink thing . . . not that he looked or anything. He blushed as he realised he had probably enacted his dream out that night, and her responses were probably very real. She smiled and leaned into his hold. "Well . . ." she murmured as she pulled him closer, "At least we're away from prying camcorders . . ."  
  
  
  
While Sakura and Syaoran were unaware of Tomoyo videotaping them anyway. . .  
  
"Okay everyone . . ." yelled the Firey, "We're nearly at the top!"  
  
"What do you mean we're nearly at the top?! We're half way between the mistress' bedroom and certain death!" Yelled the last card, which happened to be the Song card.  
  
"What's the matter . . ." the Firey yelled back tauntingly, "Can't handle a little bit of a thrill?"  
  
"High notes are one thing? Heights are quite another!"  
  
The Firey laughed as they climbed towards their goal, the window above them suddenly swung open. A checked hat leaned out of the window. "What the hell is this thing?" The Erase pointed at the arrow that held the fourteen cards on a rope up. The Firey was the first to notice, "Erase! Don't touch that!!"  
  
Erase, of course, didn't hear them and flicked her finger against the tiny arrow, which. . . of course. . . started to disappear.  
  
It was then erase took the time to look to see what was attached to the rope. She put her hand over her mouth, "Whoops!  
  
As the top of the rope fell past her the Firey glared at the erase card. "You're a bitch and I hate you."  
  
"ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGRRRRAAAAAAAAAA!" Thirteen cards screamed as they fell. The Little frown in her sleep, everyone was sure making a lot of noise . . .  
  
  
  
While fourteen really Hung-over Sakura cards plunge to the ground . . . *helpless* in the face of impending doom . . .  
  
"Breakfast is ready!!" Tomoyo's call sounded everywhere, Yue looked over his shoulder down the hall. He had locked himself in the bathroom after Touya insulted him. "Stupid Touya!" he quietly groused as he moved towards the mistress' bedroom. "Stupid, damned sexy, stupid Touya!"  
  
"And that's why Touya trapped in a pit of strawberry jelly is my favourite fantasy . . . Trust me you will NOT be able to get it out of your head for the rest of the day!" Yue glanced up at the sound of Ruby Moon's false form's voice. He paused as the Mirror ran out of the room, hands placed firmly over her mouth, the girl was blushing a very entertaining shade of green and fighting back the giggles, "Coming!" She called as she bounced down the steps.  
  
Ruby stood in the doorway, gazing after the Mirror as if she had accomplished something. She turned and spotted Yue. "Mou . . . Dear Eriol!" She gasped, "Are you having a good day or something?"  
  
"What do you mean?" He frowned at her.  
  
"In all the time I've known you, I've never seen you look so happy."  
  
"I look happy?!"  
  
"Well, I've never seen you smile before, so I assumed that you are just the opposite of everybody else!" She held her finger up very matter-of-factly, laughing hard at her obviously unfunny joke.  
  
Yue raised an eyebrow and silently brushed past her. "Why is everyone making fun of me today?"  
  
She turned and rocked on her heels thoughtfully, "Hmmm . . . could it have anything to do with . . . oh, I don't know . . ." she stood shoulder to shoulder with him as he looked down on Keroberos' sleeping form. Her face split into a big grin as she drew in a deep breath, she raised her hands to her face and . . .  
  
  
  
"Cute little descendant? Could you make a pass at Sakura?" Syaoran glared at Eriol, as the half reincarnation made his fifth joke, in as many minutes. Eriol slapped his forehead, "I'm sorry I mean could you pass me the strawberry jam. How could I get those two mixed up?"  
  
The Mirror card blushed at the mere mention of strawberry, Meilin, who was sitting opposite was the first to notice. "Is there something wrong with the word strawberry, Card girl?"  
  
"No. . ." The Mirror quickly glanced at Touya, then at the strawberry jam, and blushed, "What would make you think that?"  
  
Sakura sipped her tea, and then turned her head. "Tomoyo-chan? Aren't you hungry?"  
  
The purple haired girl looked briefly from behind her video camera, "No." She shook her head.  
  
A deep satisfied sigh from the door caught the group's attention. Spinel came the closest he ever came to smiling, "Cleeeeean!" he sighed again. The midnight blue panther, who had just came out of the downstairs shower, hopped onto a chair next to Touya, who glanced down at the towel that the panther had secured around his waist. "This might seem like a stupid question . . ." Touya began.  
  
"Knowing my intellect compared to yours . . . it probably is." Spinel spiked himself a piece of toast on one claw. "But what the hell . . . celebrate in your stupidity, ask away!"  
  
Touya ignored the insult and continued. "But why are you wearing a towel?"  
  
Spinel turned to him aghast, "I'm naked!"  
  
Touya looked at Eriol who was nodding in agreement with Spinel, he smiled, "Can't you see he isn't wearing his butterfly collar?"  
  
Touya was about to respond to the utterly nonsense comment when---  
  
"KEH-ROOO-BEEEAR-ROSSSS!! OH!! BY CLOW REED'S SOUL!! HE'S DEAD!!" everyone's head jerked up at the sound of Nakuru's voice. A brief second was spent exchanging questioning glances, before the entire collection of Keroberos' carers rushed up stairs . . .  
  
  
  
While the carers ran/bounce/floated/flew/sped walked backwards so not to lose a single shot of the ever-kawaii Sakura up the stairs . . .  
  
The thirteen Sakura cards made their second attempt to ascend to their mistress' bedroom. "Why the hell can't we wake her up?" The Flower snapped irritably as Little tried to roll over on her back. They had elected to tie her to Flower because . . . Flower frowned, "WHY THE HELL AM I CARRYING LITTLE ANYWAY?!"  
  
The Fight was just two cards higher than the burdened Flower; she smirked and called out, "Because you were stupid enough to pick her up, dumb-bell!"  
  
The Flower was about to retort when the Firey yelled, "I've just reached the top!!"  
  
"Yaaaaay!!" Cried the Song card sarcastically, "Now why don't you haul your heavy ass up and let the rest of us get there!"  
  
The Firey scowled, "If I was at my normal size I would *SO* burn you!"  
  
"KEH-ROOO-BEEEAR-ROSSSS!! OH!! BY CLOW REED'S SOUL!! HE'S DEAD!!" the Cards froze at the sound of Nakuru's voice.  
  
"NANI?!" Screamed the cards that were under the sun's influence, the ones under Yue's command stayed silent wondering what their guardian's response would be.  
  
"RUBY MOON!! DON'T SCARE US LIKE THAT!" Clow's reincarnation yelled up, "IT ISN'T FUNNY!!"  
  
The cards sighed in relief, the Firey leaned her forehead the rope, "Arigato Clow-sama. . ." she murmured her little prayer.  
  
The Little woke up slightly, and muttered "No, thank you, mistress Sakura . . . I don't like my croquettes burned. . ."  
  
The Flower sniffed the air, "Hey. . . can anyone else smell that?"  
  
"Smell what?" Said the Shot.  
  
The Sleep smelt the air, "That sort of burning rope kinda smell. . ."  
  
The Firey's head jerked up, "Eh-oh. . ."  
  
Arrow yelled up from beneath her, "What do you mean, 'Eh-oh'?!"  
  
The Firey stared down at her fellow doomed comrades, "Eh heh heeeeh. . . um. . . whoops?"  
  
As the rope smouldered and burnt right through, the Song card yelled up at the Firey, "You're bitch and I hate . . ." The top of the rope began to fall past her, "--YOU!!!" She screamed as Firey plunged head first past her.  
  
"ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGRRRRAAAAAAAAAA!" Thirteen cards screamed as they fell. The Little frown in her sleep, everyone was sure making a lot of noise . . . again . . .  
  
  
  
A little while later. . . the fourteen cards made their. . .  
  
  
  
. . . *second attempt*. . .  
  
"Oh, feck . . ." the Firey stared up as the window swung open again.  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"It's Watery . . ." she stared at her sister card as the blue skinned woman began to flick the arrow evidently enjoying the bizarre 'twang' noise it made, "NO! WATERY!! DON'T TOUCH THAT---"  
  
"Whoopies . . ." said the Watery as the arrow became loose, she stare apologetically at the Firey.  
  
"You're a bitch and I hate you."  
  
"ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGRRRRAAAAAAAAAA!" Thirteen cards screamed as they fell. The Little frown in her sleep, she wondered where all the rushing air that was blowing hard into her face was coming from . . .  
  
  
  
. . . *third attempt*. . .  
  
"I'm getting mighty sick of this climbing lark. . . oh, feck!" The Firey stared up as the window swung open again.  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"This isn't a rope. . ." Firey called as the rope began to giggle and frizzed.  
  
"Then what is it?!"  
  
"It's Illusion!!" as the Illusion changed from a rope to a giant waving hand, Firey spat, "Guess what you are and how much I happen to hate you right now?!"  
  
"ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGRRRRAAAAAAAAAA!" Thirteen cards screamed as they fell. The Little frown in her sleep, again with the noise and the rushing air. . .  
  
  
  
. . .fourth attempt. . .  
  
"Oh, feck. . ." the Firey stared up as the window swung open again.  
  
"What is it now?"  
  
"It's the master's reincarntation. . ."  
  
"Well, Fujitaka's okay . . ."  
  
"I know, he's really nice, and helpful isn't he?" The Firey said sweetly before she stared back up at the reincarnation, ". . . Pity's it's not that reincarnation. . ."  
  
"Oh, feck . . ."  
  
"Yep, that's what I said . . ." Firey sighed, "So is everyone agreed? Shall we just let go and get it over and done with already?"  
  
  
  
Eriol was a little concerned that when he pulled up the rope to give the Sakura cards a break, and help them up to Sakura's room, the cards weren't attached anymore . . . he shrugged and coiled the rope on the windowsill. As he turned away from the window, he heard a very quiet: "You're a bitch and I hate you. . . ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGRRRRAAAAAAAAAA!" But then again it was very faint and he probably imagined it.  
  
"I still don't get it. . ." Sakura peered at him.  
  
Eriol sighed, he was beginning to wish he hadn't told her the joke. They were on duty together for the first time, and Keroberos (after screaming quite healthfully at Nakuru for waking him up with her dreadful voice.) was fast asleep. Eriol sat beside her and started again, "Okay . . . so a man walks into a bar . . ."  
  
"Right." Sakura nodded attentively.  
  
"And he has three ducks with him . . ." he held up three fingers and wiggled them.  
  
"Gotcha." She wiggled three fingers back.  
  
"And the barkeep, who's curious but doesn't want any trouble, waits until the man has gone to the toilet before asking the ducks why they're here . . ." Eriol paused to check if he had lost her yet.  
  
"Uh-huh . . ."  
  
"He turns to the first duck and says, 'what's your name? And did you have a nice day?' . . ."  
  
"Mmm. . ." she hummed.  
  
Eriol nodded and continued, "And the first duck said, my name's Louie and yeah it's been brilliant . . . I've been in and out of puddles all morning . . ."  
  
"Riiight." This was the point where her understanding began to fade, so Eriol continued a little slower.  
  
"And the barkeep turns to the second duck, and asks the same questions and the second duck replies . . . I'm Douie, and yeah it's been brilliant . . . I've been in and out of puddles all afternoon . . ."  
  
"Uh-huh."  
  
"And the barkeep turns to the third duck, and again he asks what the duck's name is and how his day has been." Eriol began to chuckle it was one of his, and Clow's, favourite jokes, "And then the duck scowls at him and says, 'my name's puddles, and you better keep your hands to yourself cos I'm sick of being the uke!' "  
  
Sakura blinked at him for a bit, "I still don't get it. . ."  
  
Eriol sighed, his attempts to warp Sakura's genki-innocent mind were not going to plan. "Okay, then how about this one? . . . a man goes to the doctor, and pulls down his trousers and shows his backside to the doctor, and the doctor yells, 'My god, man!! what the hell happened?!' and the man says. . ."  
  
  
  
While Eriol was telling increasingly dirty jokes to Sakura. . .  
  
"Gaki. . . a word outside. . ." Syaoran gulped slightly as he followed Touya into the garden. Once outside, Touya sighed, "It's true isn't it?"  
  
"About Sakura and me?" Touya nodded silently, Syaoran nodded quietly.  
  
"And what about Meilin?" Touya eyed him, "Last time I heard you two were betrothed to each other. . ."  
  
"We made a deal, that if one of us ever fell in love that we would be able to opt out of the marriage." Syaoran explained simply.  
  
Touya took this in and gazed up at the second floor of the house, "Alright . . . I relinquish her to you. . . but you better be better than me with her!"  
  
"I'll be sure to call her kaijuu every chance I get. . ." Syaoran promised solemnly.  
  
Touya smiled fondly at him, "Aaaah. . . but it mustn't stop there. . . come with me, allow me to teach you in the ways of irritating Sakura. . ."  
  
  
  
Later that night. . .  
  
"Syaoran? Could you make a pass at Sakura?" Eriol slapped his head mockingly as he told the same joke again, "I mean, could you pass the sauce?"  
  
As Syaoran came very close to throwing the scalding hot gravy at Eriol's grinning mug, Sakura and Tomoyo carried the last bowls of food in. they had made sure a plate had been made up for Keroberos, but since he was fast asleep, they would have to feed him later. Instead the group gathered around the table, they were confident that Keroberos wasn't in any danger of falling even more ill, so they took the opportunity to catch up. "Eriol. . .?"  
  
"Yes, Sakura?"  
  
"I still don't get the one about the elephant. . ."  
  
"Maybe I should tell you later. . ." he looked down at his plate, the meal looked very appetising, "After we finished eating. . ."  
  
They were all happily chomping away at their meal, when Touya suddenly noticed Yukito was rubbing his foot against Touya's leg. Touya smiled to let Yukito, who was sitting opposite him at the small table, know he had noticed. He looked at Yukito, who winked back, his eyes betraying a very sexual glint. Touya's smile became a little subtler; he didn't want everyone to guess that Yukito was horny. Another fifteen minutes past and the leg stroking stopped, Touya looked up again at Yukito, slightly disappointed. But Yukito looked back and tugged his ear, then scratched the side of his nose, then tapped his fingers under his chin. He smiled and then winked again. Touya didn't get it, but he still smiled as the leg stroking began again. There was something fun and strangely arousing about exchanging little signs with Yukito while the others were here. He looked up again and this time, Yukito tugged his ear, scratched the side of his nose, tapped his fingers under his chin, and then made little walking motions with his fingers on the table cloth, Yukito looked up and winked again. Touya frowned, now he definitely didn't get it. A smile spread over Yukito's face as he stood, and picked up his plate.  
  
"Hoe? Finished already Yukito?" Sakura blinked at the standing snow bunny, whose eyes never lost Touya's.  
  
Yuki ignored her as he hurled his plate at the wall behind Touya, it smashed and the plate's contents slid down the wall, when everyone looked at him in shock, Yukito put his finger against his chin and grinned like a gormless idiot. His voice took on a mocking feminine tone as he laughed insincerely, "Gomeeeen!" He grinned as he continued to stare at Touya, "Whoops, I did I drop my plate? . . . oh no, don't get up! I'll get it!"  
  
He flopped on to the floor and started to crawl under the table towards his smashed plate. The group blinked at each other, and looked under the table as Yukito crawled on his stomach towards Touya. Touya was gaping at Yuki, as he popped up from under the table. Yukito was on his knees, in front of Touya and his head was between Touya's legs . . . any other circumstance, Touya would have been very happy to have Yukito's head between his legs, but not here!  
  
"What are you doing?"  
  
Yukito pressed his fingers against his lips and shushed him loudly, "Shhh! We don't want to alert the others . . . I think I got over here unnoticed, but we can't talk here . . ." he was whispering very loudly, he looked from side to side rapidly, and then motioned Touya closer. "Meet me in the sink under the cupboard!"  
  
"Don't you mean in the cupboard under the sink?"  
  
"Very well, we will meet there if you think it will be more secure!"  
  
He reversed slightly and crawled out from under the table he picked up a broken fragment of his plate and stood very suddenly, "Oh dear!" He announced stiffly very loudly, "It looks like I must go into the *kitchen* and get myself another plate . . . yes, I must go into the *kitchen* *alone*, and get myself a plate *alone*, and I will not be exchanging any information with anyone when I am in there . . . even if they *meet* me in the sink under the cupboard . . ."  
  
Yukito blinked broadly at Touya and then walked stiltedly backwards out of the room. The group stared at the door for a few moments before Yukito's head popped back around the door, "I am getting my plate *now*, just like a good snow bunny-wunny . . . not that it is of any importance to anyone . . . nobody, not even anyone who will *meet* me in the sink under the cupboard . . ."  
  
Eriol started to laugh, not that he knew why or anything, it was sort of like the time Yue had caught his hair, and a tree suffered the consequences of Yue's anger. Syaoran shook his head, "Is anyone else freaked out by that?" Sakura, Nakuru, Spinel, Meilin and Touya raised their hands, "Good, then it's not just me who's freaked out by the snow rabbit's behaviour . . ."  
  
Tomoyo turned to Touya, "I think you are supposed to meet him. . ."  
  
"You think?"  
  
  
  
Touya entered the darken kitchen, he sighed and walked over to the sink, at least Yukito wasn't crammed into the washing basin or anything stupid like that. There was a tug at his trousers, and he closed his eyes //tell me that he isn't stuffed into the cupboard . . .// Touya looked down as a pale hand waved at him and slipped back into the cupboard. He sighed and crouched down. "What did you want?"  
  
The hand beckoned him into the cupboard, "Oh no! You must be kidding . . . I am not getting into *that* cupboard."  
  
Yukito's hand became like a snakes head as it in a negative gesture; it grasped the handle of the cupboard beside it and swung the door open.  
  
Touya stared at it; "I am not getting into *that* cupboard either." The hand waved again and then slammed the door, to the cupboard that Yukito was in, shut tightly. Touya stood again, and stared at the cupboard for twenty minutes, it became increasingly clear that Yuki wasn't going to come out. Touya sighed and shook his hands upwards, "Why me?!" He groaned mutely.  
  
Ten minutes later, "Okay, I'm in the cupboard, what is it that you want to tell me . . .?"  
  
"It's actually more of a question. . ." Yuki's voice was still uneven and stupidly high.  
  
Touya sighed, "Okay . . . what is your question then?"  
  
"Come closer . . ." Yuki whispered in the darkness. Touya sighed sharply and shuffled slightly closer, "No closer than that. . ." Touya sighed again as he rearranged himself so he sat with his back to Yukito, he turned his head towards Yukito, who was now kneeling behind him. The snow rabbit chewed slightly on Touya's ear, making Touya shiver with delight even though he was cramped into a cupboard that didn't even come up to his hip. "Closer. . ." Yukito murmured, Touya pushed back against the rabbit, as he wrapped his arms around Touya.  
  
"Okay. . .?" Touya asked quietly.  
  
"Mmm-hmm . . ." hummed Yukito, as he started to kiss and lick the back of Touya's neck. Touya would have been loving this, especially if it was happening in his room, with Yue or Yuki, (or preferably both alternatively) and some nice sensual beats in the background . . . but not here, in the dark cupboard under the sink. "What was it you wanted to ask me?" He managed to ground out before a slight moan escaped his lips.  
  
"I just wanted to know something To-ya. . ." Yuki moved over to the other ear, "Just one small little answer from you. . ." he shuffled around Touya slightly, and pressed his lips against Touya's ear, he whispered, "Can you handle that To-ya? Just one small question?"  
  
"Anything . . ." Touya smiled in the dark as he felt Yuki's cool hand start to unbutton his shirt. He also felt Yuki's smile as he breathed against Touya's ear before . . .  
  
  
  
The dining group looked up as Yukito's voice sounded very loudly. "IS THIS WARNING ENOUGH THEN?!"  
  
A few minutes later, Yue stepped into the room coolly, he stepped over the mess Yukito had made when he threw his plate at the wall, and then sat rather quietly at the table, he regarded every person with a cool gaze before he stood again. "I am going to check on Keroberos . . ."  
  
He brushed past Touya as he swept out of the room, Touya sat down rather dazed, and the rest of the diners stared at him quizzically. "All right . . ." Meilin was the first to ask, "I give . . . what did you do to tick Yue off this time?"  
  
  
  
As Touya tried to explain, Eriol slipped out of the room, "Yue!" He said softly.  
  
Yue paused on the steps and quietly descended again, "Yes?"  
  
"I . . ." Eriol faltered, then swallowed, "I have something to tell you . . ."  
  
Yue folded his arms, "What is it?"  
  
"It's about Clow . . ."  
  
Yue perched himself on the step before Eriol, and leant forward, his face set in a worried frown. "What is it?"  
  
Eriol raised his hand and stroked his former life's moon guardian's cheek, "He didn't . . . he didn't . . ."  
  
"Didn't what?"  
  
Eriol, or rather Clow, chickened out at the last minute; "He didn't make enough pudding . . . would you like some now?"  
  
Yue's face blanked, "And I was sure you were going to say something that actually had any bearing on my life . . ." he stood and glared, "I'm going to check on Keroberos . . . I'll be sure to pass on what incredible information you have said."  
  
Eriol, or rather Clow, watched Yue sadly as the moon guardian stomped up the stairs no doubt muttering about how stupid Touya was again. Inside his mind, Eriol was standing there tapping his foot impatiently on the ground while a sheepish Clow said, "I'll tell them . . . just not now . . ."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
-----------------------  
  
And Now It's Time For LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!!  
  
DrM: Konnichiwa!! [Is slightly disturbed by Ruby's silence.  
  
Nakuru: That whole chapter doesn't make any sense . . .  
  
DrM: It does so . . . it's just you must seek the deeper meaning.  
  
Eriol: Hey! You said I could tell the one about the ferret!  
  
DrM: I lied.  
  
Eriol: But it's really good!  
  
DrM: It's sick!  
  
Eriol: But I'm sure Firey would disagreed with you there!  
  
Firey: I just want to mention the fact people have to R&R this . . . and Eriol . . . you are a dead man!  
  
Eriol: Well, yes, DUH! I *am* Clow Reed's reincarnation . . .  
  
DrM: Sorry minna-chan that this has been so late, the evil that is 'real life' kinda had to be addressed, pleeeeease R&R. . . and if anyone can find it in their heart to R&R 'And Then Yue Said, "Bring It On!".' Just *one* more time I will be very happy . . . I can't help it . . . I just can't stand odd numbers, and it's stuck on 69 . . .  
  
Eriol: Not that that's a bad number . . . so anyway, a man walks into a bar, and the barkeep walks up to him with this huge grin plastered on to his face, and the bar keep says, 'I'm gonna sell you this ferret . . . it'll change you life forever' and the man's like--- **POOF!!**[gets transported to the next chapter]  
  
DrM: Well, now Eriol the feisty sex-fiend is safely in the other chapter, I hope all the lovely minna-chan can join me there!! Also . . . I'm thinking of changing the name of this fic, because it really doesn't apply anymore. . . so if you have any ideas, please post them in your reviews!! THANK YOU!! 


	11. What did the tree ever do to you?!

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!  
  
I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be!  
  
Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make!  
  
"Speaking"  
  
*Stress/emphasis*  
  
//Thinking//  
  
  
  
Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat.  
  
By Dr Megalomania.  
  
  
  
Part Eleven: What did the tree ever do to you?!  
  
  
  
He was bored.  
  
Really, really bored.  
  
Again.  
  
It had been the grand total of two weeks, and five days since he had fallen ill, and now . . . he was sick of it. Sick of Yue alternatively being worried when Keroberos was too tired to keep awake and snappy when Keroberos was awake enough to play pranks on him. He was sick of making Sakura so worried. Defiantly sick of Tomoyo, and her knowing everything, whenever anyone consulted her about what to feed him, her answer was always a hot soup, or dry toast, or a very *tiny* amount of ice cream. He frowned, it wasn't his fault that he'd thrown up the last time they indulged his request from a huge plate of brownies and chocolate. Now he wasn't allowed anything with an inch of taste, in case that might make him sick. "Oh, no! We can't give him anything decent to eat, no, in case it might make him sick!" Kero sarcastically muttered to himself in his best Tomoyo-voice.  
  
He sighed and looked over at Sakura's alarm. It was Two A.M. in the morning, his nurses . . . Touya and The Mirror, were both fast asleep. She had volunteered to do the night shift with him again, when asked why she hadn't really given any answer, but when she had gone to tell the other cards, Firey and Watery's voices could be quite plainly heard from below. "YOU'VE VOLUNTEERED TO DO *WHAT*?! OOOH GREAT! THIS MEANS YOU'LL BE BLOODY WELL HAAYYYYYAAAANNNN-ING FOR THE REST OF FECKING ETERNITY!!"  
  
So now, Kero was alone, staring into the darkness, listening to their snores for amusement.  
  
He looked over at the shelf that had become his bedside table. A small basket of strawberries sat promisingly on it, just out of his reach. Yue had got them for him. During one of Yue's shifts, Kero had muttered that he wanted strawberries; and the second his shift was over, Yue had taken off. About fifteen hours later, Yue had returned with this small basket of strawberries. Not just any basket of berries, they had come all the way from England, from Keroberos' favourite strawberry patch. Yue brought them into the room without a word, put them on the shelf and transformed away, leaving an exhausted Yukito in his place. Yukito looked particularly dazed, and just before he past out he cried in dismay, "What do you mean the hippie movement died out?! . . . I loved all the groovy people, baby!" He staggered against To-ya, "Oh, look! Totally psychedelic colours, man! Power to the people!"  
  
Keroberos sighed again, as much as he had wanted to take advantage of the situation, he just . . . couldn't; his illness had prevented him from doing too much. He couldn't eat all the luscious treats he *knew* Tomoyo could create, not that she would because "Oh *NO* that might make him sick!" Keroberos groused high-pitched again. He couldn't annoy Ruby or Spinel because they'd just grin and bear it. Even when he had said it might make him feel better if Ruby didn't open her mouth or better yet didn't come out of her other form she just nodded and complied. Even when he had made Spinel watch the Disney version of Alice in wonderland over and over again, knowing quite full well that Spinel couldn't stand Disney because they always change the storyline of every fairytale to fit what they thought was 'good' for the audience, Spinel would just fold his arms and glower at the screen until it ended and when Keroberos clapped his paws happily and said, "Again! Again!"  
  
Spinel just smiled and replied, "Eh heeeh. . . of course. . .", they didn't seem to want to leave because Eriol wanted to stay. Meilin and Syaoran were the main cooks so he didn't annoy them, besides every so often Meilin would slip him a nice treat. Sakura and Eriol sat with him for hours, Sakura would talk away while Eriol would bring out a book, a fairytale or a book of fables, and read to him. And as for Touya . . . there wasn't one thing Keroberos could do to annoy him, not because he did anything particularly nice [the meanie would mock him every chance he got, and repeatedly told Kero that the instant he was well again he was going on a diet!] but because Touya was the one that would carry Kero up and down the stairs and Kero didn't think he'd get better if Touya 'accidentally' dropped him.  
  
He sighed and picked up the ruler that he kept beside him. He tapped the small lamp on, and then flicked the switch of the fan on. Both objects were well out of his reach, simply because their power cables weren't long enough. It had taken him most of the day before yesterday, yesterday and then a bit of last night to figure out that instead of constantly asking for help to switch the damned things on, he could just use a ruler and flick them on and off at his command. He felt a little silly for not figuring this out earlier.  
  
He was staring at the lamp, trying to stretch his left paw at it when he had suddenly thought, //I wish my arm was longer// then it occurred to him that when monkeys need to get at ants that were out of their reach, they used a stick. By some fuzzy logic, this resulted in the idea of using a ruler, to compensate for the stretch. As he rested back into his pillow, he looked at the ruler again. He sighed as he thought, //a monkey would have figured this out ages ago . . . a *monkey* would have been bathing in the soft glow of the lamp, enjoying a cool breeze and probably sipping a dry martini by the time it took me to realise that I could use a ruler as a handy-switch-flicker-on-and-off-er . . .//  
  
Keroberos sighed again. He was sick of being sick. He couldn't sleep because he'd slept so much; it had disrupted his normal sleep patterns. He hated it even more because it meant when he wanted to be awake, like when Sakura or Yue was around, he'd fall asleep. Kero closed his eyes, and tried to sleep. He wanted to be better now. Not in a few days, like Tomoyo suggest when he had asked, now.  
  
He peered at the clock again, two twenty. He growled softly. "Go to sleep," he quietly commanded himself. But his body refused to comply. He turned over again, his fur was sweaty, he knew he still had a bit of a temperature, but he didn't feel so bad that he had to be confined to bed all the time. But Sakura insisted, and then Yue did, and so did Eriol, so he couldn't leave the bed, even though he was really bored with staring at Sakura's walls. He couldn't even play video games, when he had tried, he had become woozy and they had taken away the console. He groaned and turned the light and fan back off. He was getting increasingly annoyed at not being able to sleep. He closed his eyes and didn't open them; despite the fact he knew this wouldn't get him to fall asleep.  
  
  
  
A few hours later, he felt a cool breeze over him. His eyes flicked open as he glanced over at the fan to check if he had left it on. The blades were completely still, he looked up at the ceiling . . . and came face to face with Yue.  
  
"GAH!" He yelped in surprise. Yue landed softly, as Kero growled at him, "Oh yeah I'm sick of the flu and you give me a heart-attack!!" he made a half-hearted swipe at Yue, "Don't do that!"  
  
Yue didn't respond as he settled down beside his ill brother. Once his wings had faded away, and he had arranged his robes and his hair to his liking, he looked at Keroberos, "How are you feeling now?"  
  
Kero looked at the clock before answering, it was five thirty. "I can't sleep, and I'm sick of this, I want to be better now."  
  
Yue smiled slightly as he reached over to the water bowl. He lifted a damp towel out of it, and squeezed the excess water from it. He hummed slightly as he pressed it against Kero's forehead. Golden eyes slid shut, and Kero purred. "You never had any patience." Yue murmured, and dipped the cloth in the water again. He repeated the motion, as he continued, "You will be fine soon . . ." he paused, and pulled Kero's chin toward him, "I was so worried about you."  
  
"I was worried about you too . . ." Kero looked at him briefly, and then glanced down. "I could hear you . . . when you came in that night and sang. You don't know how much I wanted to open my eyes and tell you that you were singing in the wrong key."  
  
Yue didn't answer, and they sat in companionable silence for about half an hour before Yue sighed. "You told her, didn't you?"  
  
"Told whom what?"  
  
"You told the mistress about my . . ." Yue blushed and looked down.  
  
"Twitch?" Kero grinned, "No, I didn't . . . I just warned her not to let you near books." He giggled and peered at Yue intently, "Why?"  
  
"I was about to go into Fujitaka's library the other day, and she stopped me."  
  
"What were you going to do in Fujitaka's library?" Kero teased.  
  
Yue frowned with annoyance; "I was going to get a book!"  
  
"Why?" Kero fought back a giggle.  
  
"I was going to *peruse* it!" Yue said surly.  
  
Kero snickered, and murmured, "Sure, just like you *perused* the books at home . . ."  
  
Yue's eyes widened, as he gasped. "That was a one-time thing!"  
  
Kero giggled again as he lifted his paws and counted, "Oh really? Just like it was a one-time thing after I hid so well during a game of 'hide and go seek' that you honestly thought you had lost me, a one-time thing after I burnt your hair," he flicked at Yue's fringe and continued, "A one-time thing after I told you Clow was going to *spa-ann-nk* you for using my tail as a paint brush," Yue giggled as his brother continued, "A one-time thing after Clow told us that he was going to back in a hour's time and was then only *five* minutes late getting back, a one-time thing after I accidentally got green paint on your wings, a one-time thing after you caught your hair in a tree and Clow threatened to cut your hair off at your shoulders when you *blew* the tree up . . ." Keroberos sniggered after the last one.  
  
The memory was humorous for both of them, Yue had been flying particularly low one day and his long hair became caught in some branches. He didn't realise until he was yanked back, when the slack pulled up. Yue, after spending an hour trying to pull his hair loose, settled for blew the tree sky high. Clow had stood by the smoking crater, scratching his head, bits of ex-tree falling down all around him. He didn't know why he was laughing but he was. Keroberos and Yue stood near-by as Clow pointed from Yue to the crater, and then back again in amazement. "Why?" Was all he could ask, "Why? What possible justification . . .? *Why*?!" He shook his hands at the smoking hole, "What did the tree ever do to *you*?!" He had chortled.  
  
The pair were laughing too much to notice that they had woken Touya. He cleared his throat loudly, to catch their attention. Good morning he said quietly, as he joined them. "If you don't mind me asking, what were you talking about?"  
  
"Nothing!" Yue snapped.  
  
Kero grinned, "Yue's twitch."  
  
"What kind of twitch?"  
  
"It's not a twitch!" Yue blushed and looked away as Keroberos sniggered.  
  
Kero sighed happily as he explained, "Did you know that there was a Move card?"  
  
Touya thought for a bit before answering, "Yes I did, but Sakura told me it doesn't actually do that much."  
  
Kero nodded sagely, "Aaaah, yes . . . it does seem useless at first . . . unless you take into account Yue's twitch." He giggled; "Yue has the rather annoying habit of moving small things around when he's nervous, upset or scared . . ."  
  
"I've noticed that . . . he was moving bottles and folding towels the first night you were ill."  
  
Kero nodded, "That's Stage One . . . that's why the move card was created. Clow got tired of constantly having to move things back, so he created a card that could follow Yue around during one of his phases . . ."  
  
"You said Stage One . . ." he glanced at Yue speculatively; "There's a Stage Two?"  
  
"Oh, yeah . . . the books. He moves books around, re-organising them; sometimes it would be by title, other times it would be by subject. He did it to Clow's library once, every book by number of pages. "  
  
Yue rolled his eyes and shook his head silently, as Touya spoke, "That doesn't sound too bad . . ."  
  
"Yep, that's what Clow said when I told him . . ." Kero nodded quite seriously, ". . . Until he remembered that his library was three floors high, stacked full of books wall-to-wall . . ." Touya's eyes widened, as Yue pressed his hands over his eyes, ". . .And that's *not* including the isles."  
  
  
  
Elsewhere in the house . . .  
  
"You're up kinda early."  
  
Syaoran turned to find Sakura leant against the kitchen doorway. "I know," he turned back to his tea making. "Do you want some?"  
  
"What are you making?" Sakura shuffled over to the table and sat down.  
  
"Just some tea, I'll make you breakfast if you like."  
  
Sakura yawned widely, and stared at him sleepily, "No, thank you, just some tea will be fine."  
  
He nodded and handed her a cup, she yawned again. "You should go back to bed." He noted, he rubbed her shoulders and massaged her neck briefly as he passed her.  
  
She blinked at him as he sat down. He was fully dressed, in his ceremonial robes. "Did you go training?"  
  
He paused before sipping his tea, "No, not yet."  
  
She glanced at his sword; it lay on the table still in its sheaf. "Would you like some company? Tomoyo left one of my old costumes here, I could put it on and we could get back into some practice."  
  
"What's this about we? I *am* still in practice." She laughed softly, and he smiled. "It's still dark out if you'd rather wait until daylight . . ." he grabbed one of her small hands and leant forward.  
  
"I can handle training in the dark!" She squeezed his hand and pressed her nose against his.  
  
"We shall see about that . . ." he smiled, brown eyes darker in the shadows of the kitchen.  
  
"We shall. . ." said Sakura, as she brushed a faint kiss over his lips.  
  
  
  
The air was very cool as they faced each other; she was wearing the first costume Tomoyo had ever made her wear. The large red cloak was just a few centimetres shorter, and the dark blue shorts were just a little tighter, but the red hat with it's shiny gold buckles on the leather blue straps, and the brilliant white undercoat still fit perfectly. Sakura tugged the black thigh high boots up a tiny bit as she called forth the sword card. Sakura shivered as she waved her sword in front of her, getting used to the weight again. She glanced up to see Syaoran studying her intently.  
  
"Too cold for the little Cherry Blossom?" He softly mocked.  
  
She raised an eyebrow as she took her stance. "Maybe I should warn you that the Sword makes anyone who handles it into a master swordsman."  
  
"Ooooh! I'm scared!"  
  
"So you should be!!" cried Sakura as she swung the blade at him, their game beginning. He jumped and rolled out of the way. Her blade struck the ground as he quickly ran around her. Syaoran grabbed the back of her long red cloak and threw it over her head. "Hey!" Sakura cried indignantly. "I'm gonna make you regret that!"  
  
She uncovered herself in time to see Syaoran jump up and stand, perfectly balanced on the garden wall. "Oh? Really? Is that a promise Cherry Blossom?" He whirled his sword around his wrist once more before jumping down. "I doubt you be able to make me say you're my better. . . ever!" Sakura ducked as he swung the blade once over her head, jumped as it swiped under her feet.  
  
"Is that a challenge Little Wolf?" Sakura started to pant slightly, she *was* a bit out of practice.  
  
He grinned as she fought back, trying to do the same moves, but he blocked them all. "If you'd like it to be, Cheery Blossom!" After allowing her a few swings, he pushed her back. She stumbled, rolled and came up panting. "Awww. . . the little Cherry Blossom tired now?"  
  
She grinned, and pulled out a card. She whispered a few incarnations as a bright light enveloped her. Once the light faded, Sakura smiled and nodded to Sakura, who nodded back. They raised their swords together, mirroring each other's stances. "Now there are two little Cherry Blossoms, and YOU will be begging for mercy!"  
  
Syaoran glanced back at the house, "But the Mirror card's . . . of, course Twin card! Oh, well, that's okay;" he raised his hand and beckoned them forward, "I can handle both of you!"  
  
The Sakuras roared as they rushed forward.  
  
  
  
Perhaps it was too early in the morning, or maybe it was because she hadn't woken up yet, but one thing Meilin *wasn't* sure of was the fact that she was seeing *two* Sakuras. She rubbed her eyes and shook her head. Tomoyo quietly entered the kitchen as well, "Meilin?"  
  
"Tomoyo!" Meilin jumped. "I just came to get a glass of water. Do you want one?"  
  
Tomoyo smiled, and nodded. While they were sipping their drinks, Meilin glanced out the window; the two Sakuras were now running after Syaoran. "Tomoyo. . .?" The three ran out of the window's frame, to the right side, as Tomoyo turned.  
  
"Hai?"  
  
"Do you see two Sakuras?"  
  
Tomoyo peered out the window as Syaoran ran into sight followed by one Sakura, "I see one Sakura, Meilin." She answered softly and turned away to sit down.  
  
"Oh . . ." Meilin sighed and looked out the window once more. Syaoran had stopped and was fending off Sakura. A second Sakura appeared from behind him and started to tickle him. "Tomoyo!"  
  
"Hai?"  
  
"See! There are two!" Meilin spun around to look at Tomoyo and pointed out the window. Tomoyo just missed Syaoran pushing the Sakura that was fighting him with her sword away from him hard. The purple haired girl could only see Syaoran laughing hard as the tickling Sakura force him to the ground. She turned away from the window to face Meilin, whose mouth hung open. "Meilin . . . I think you should go back to bed . . ." Meilin frowned as the second Sakura came back, and joined her identical twin in their tickle attack on her cousin.  
  
She pointed again, "But look! There are two of them!"  
  
Syaoran struggled and managed to kick one of the Sakuras away, before Tomoyo turned. Tomoyo sighed and rolled her eyes, again there was only one Sakura in the garden. "Li Meilin," Tomoyo sighed again, and turned around, the red-eyed Chinese girl was still staring out the window. "I see one Sakura, and she's giving Syaoran the noogie of a lifetime . . ."  
  
Meilin cried out, "Look now!" The second Sakura pounced on Syaoran and peeled off his slippers, she began a vicious tickle attack on Syaoran's feet. He bucked so hard with laughter the other Sakura was thrown off and rolled away. Tomoyo shook her head and looked out the window again, "All right I was wrong."  
  
"See! I knew you'd realise there were two."  
  
"No, I mean I was wrong she's tickling his feet *not* giving him the noogie of a lifetime." As Meilin started to protest Tomoyo pushed her out of the kitchen, "Come on you are going back to bed."  
  
  
  
"By the Ancestors!!" Syaoran cried out breathlessly, "Stop! STOP!!"  
  
One of them was sitting on his legs and the other was cradling his head in her lap. Both were tickling him and he almost couldn't breathe because he was laughing so hard. "I can't breathe!" he gasped, "Stop!"  
  
"But you said you could handle us both!"  
  
"I can but this is cheating," he ground out before another bout of laughter over came him, his back arched as he tried to kick the Sakura on his legs off. However that Sakura easily stayed on and increased her attack. The one that was holding him down by the shoulders laughed, "Say it!"  
  
His eyes snapped open as he stared at the emerald eyed card mistress, "Never!" he growled.  
  
"If you don't say it," the one on his legs called over her shoulder, "We won't stop!"  
  
He bucked again, "Never! Never! NEVER!"  
  
The two Sakuras giggled again. "Fine! We can keep this up for ages if necessary!!"  
  
  
  
After Meilin finally agreed that it was probably better for her to go to sleep and forget about the two scary Sakuras, Tomoyo sighed and returned to her own sleeping bag. She managed not to gasp as an arm sneaked around her waist. "What was that all about?" A sleepy voice murmured into her ear.  
  
"Meilin thinks that there's two Sakuras."  
  
"The girl's crazy anyway." Eriol chuckled and pulled Tomoyo closer, "Mmmmm. . ." he hummed, "You're warm."  
  
Tomoyo chuckled lightly, "I know I am but you have cold hands. And you'd better get them off my butt before I break your arms off." When he didn't answer, she peered over her shoulder. Eriol had fallen fast asleep again.  
  
  
  
Once Keroberos had fallen asleep again, Yue rose to leave.  
  
"Yue . . .?" Yue fiddled with his cuffs, and eyed Touya silently; he hadn't said a word to him unless others were around. "Yue . . ." Touya sighed and slipped his arms around the moon guardian's waist. He rested his chin on the guardian's shoulder, "Yue?" He hummed musically into the angel's ear. Yue sighed and turned his head slightly.  
  
He raise an eyebrow, "What?"  
  
Touya smiled faintly, "I said I was sorry." The eyebrow rose a little more, Touya rolled his eyes as he understood the movement, "And I was wrong. I should pay a little more attention to the transformation . . ."  
  
Yue stared at him for a bit, then pulled his arms off. Touya looked in confusion at the angel as he walked away slightly; Yue had his back turned to Touya as he spoke softly. "That's not why I got so angry."  
  
Touya had to strain somewhat to hear what he was saying, "Then what made you mad?"  
  
Yue glanced at him quickly, and moved over to Sakura's shelf, he wrapped his arms around himself. His eyes glowed dimly as the books started to rearrange themselves, slowly and one by one. There was a short silence before Touya wrapped his arms around Yue again. He rested his chin again and watched the books as Yue rearranged them according to the name of the author. Touya looked at Yue's face, he seemed sad about something, "What is it?"  
  
Yue sucked in his bottom lip before he blurted quickly, "Which of us do you prefer?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"You seemed so disappointed when I transformed in, and yet . . . you're never unhappy when Tsukishiro returns." Yue looked at him, "You love him . . . don't you?"  
  
"I'd be lying if I said I didn't." Touya answered honestly. Yue looked away and the books began to shuffle quicker, this time assorting themselves by number. There was a cough from behind them, and Keroberos was peering up at them, "Uh . . . hate to interrupt, but uh . . . lion's gotta do what a enchanted lion's gotta do, ya know . . ."  
  
Yue shrugged, slipping Touya's arms off, and sat by the shelf. He didn't looked at Touya or Keroberos as he pulled the books off the shelf and started to rearrange them again, "Don't mind me . . ." he murmured, over his shoulder, "I'll just do this and then I'm leaving."  
  
Touya stared at him, wishing he'd turn, but Keroberos nudged at him out the door. Touya looked down at him irritated, "Couldn't you have held it in for a bit longer."  
  
Kero sat and glanced at Sakura's room, he spoke in a low tone, "Keep your voice down . . . Yue might not have as great hearing as I do but he still picks up on nearly everything you say . . ."  
  
Touya crouched down, "What is it?"  
  
"Baka!" Kero took a swipe at him, "That's my brother in there! And I'm not gonna let you hurt him!"  
  
"I'm not!"  
  
"You are! Yue's always was nervous 'bout Yukito." Keroberos growled, his Osaka accent growing deeper, "And there you go tell him you like the snow rabbit . . . his own false form . . . *better* than him!"  
  
"I don't like Yuki better than Yue . . ." Touya struggled to keep his voice down, "I was just about to tell him that! They are the same person; even Sakura can see that was Clow's original intention!"  
  
Kero glanced at the door again, "Fine! Be sure you tell him that."  
  
"Or what? You'll sneeze on me? Eat all my pudding like you always do?"  
  
"Eriol isn't the only one that can charm bikes to attract the Dash card . . ." he rose and padded back to the door, he sent one more warning glance at Touya, "Be sure to remember that if you hurt my brother."  
  
Touya followed the lion back into his sister's room; Keroberos purred and rubbed himself against Yue's back before settling back in bed. Yue slid the last book onto the shelf; he looked at Kero then stood. He walked towards Touya to exit the room but Touya grabbed his arm, they exchange a silent glance as Touya tried to find the words to tell Yue. But before he could speak, Yue looked away. The transformation was swift, and quiet. "Eh . . .?" Yukito looked around disorientated. "To-ya? Weren't we at the dinner table just now?"  
  
Touya smiled a little, "Yue."  
  
"Oh. . ." Yukito nodded in understanding. Touya glanced at the mirror and Keroberos, and seemed to come to some sort of internal decision, "Yuki . . . I need to talk to you."  
  
"Nani?" Yuki questioned as the taller boy dragged him to his bedroom.  
  
  
  
Yuki sat quietly on the bed as Touya. His stomach was growling insistently, but he ignored it as he watch Touya pace back and forth. Touya seemed very thoughtful; he would often pause and then glance at Yukito. Then he would shake his head and resume his pacing. After a few minutes, Yukito sighed, "Is it about Yue?"  
  
Touya looked at him. "Yes."  
  
Yukito adjusted his glasses, and peered at Touya, "Has he done something to upset Sakura?"  
  
"No. . . I think I've upset Yue."  
  
Yukito blinked, although he had never met the guardian himself, they had talked on a few occasions, and from the impression he got Yue didn't seem like one to get easily upset. "How could you have achieved that?"  
  
Touya turned away from Yukito and resumed his pacing, as he explained. "He thinks I love you more than I do him."  
  
"You love him as well?"  
  
Touya turned quickly as Yuki's shoulders drooped, he sighed and moved towards his koi. He knelt, sitting on his heels and took the smaller boy's hands, "Yes I do . . . but what neither of you don't seem to understand is that to me you're just the same person . . . it's just like . . ." he looked out the window as he tried to think of something to explain his feelings, "It's like you're the day and he's the night, you have to love both because you can't have one by itself. There are aspects of the day, like it's warmth, openness and light that you just adore, but the night is . . . mysterious, but beautiful. And when I'm with one of you, I can still see the other just as easily. I can't love one of you, I have to love both of you or I'd lose you and Yue . . ." he squeezed the pale hands, still staring out the window. "He doesn't understand that I can't possibly *not* love him as deeply as I love you. I just don't know why you and Yue . . . why you two don't get the fact that everyone thinks about you as the same person . . . why I love the both of you . . ."  
  
"You never told me." Touya's head snapped back, and found Yue in Yuki's place. Yue blushed, to the amazement of Touya; he looked down at their clasped hands, "Sorry . . ."  
  
Touya moved up, kneeling in front of the cool angel. "Don't be . . . I love you too." He lifted a hand and stroked the side of his face. "If you had been awake when I had been trying to tell Yuki that I wanted to be more than friends . . . you would have known I don't have a very good way with words."  
  
He moved forward and wrapped his arms around Yue's slender waist again, he felt Yue move his legs around his body. He smiled openly as he gazed up at Yue, and Yue rested his arms around Touya's neck. In the darkened bedroom, they stared into each other's eyes, the world around the pair fading away. "What about me?" Yue murmured. "Do you want to ask me if you can be more than friends with me?"  
  
Touya smiled as Yue's head dipped, the dark haired boy tightened his grip on the pale being's thighs as he felt the angel's perfect little teeth bite slightly on his ear. "Yue . . . Yue, Yue, Yue . . ." Touya growled in a low tone, he, of course, knew that Yuki always did that to his ear just before a wild night, ". . .oooh . . ." he moaned. "Yue. . . I . . . you . . ."  
  
"Mmm . . .?" The moon angel hummed back.  
  
The smile on Touya's face grew, as he ran his hands up and down Yue's thighs slowly, "Would you like to be more than friends now?"  
  
Yue moved his head so Touya could see his rapidly darkening eyes again. "I thought I'd have to wait until the next Cardcaptor released the Sakura cards before you'd ever ask . . ." Touya shivered slightly at the deep rumbling purr in Yue's voice. Yue felt more than a little breathless as Touya pushed himself up towards to meet Yue's lips. He didn't feel like a cool-headed Judgement Maker as Touya's deep sapphire eyes slid shut, even less so when he felt Touya's fingers begin to tug as the clasp that held his sash on. He giggled slightly, and thought for a moment, //Whoa . . . I sound like Yuki . . .// but then he couldn't think anymore . . . but that was okay because Touya was just a breath away. His darkening amethyst eyes slid shut as he prepared to feel the practiced lips of Kinomoto Touya . . .  
  
"Uh . . . 'scuse me?"  
  
Yue gasped and Touya moved back, as the interruption pieced both their frazzled brains, Yue scowled at the door as his brother sat rather sheepishly in the door. He shook his hands at Touya, hoping to communicate his point. "Nani?!" He growled though his teeth.  
  
"Eh heh . . . I um, I . . ." Keroberos put a paw behind his head guiltily, "I really . . . really . . . really, really, *really* hate to interrupt this . . . this . . ." he waved a paw at them in a attempt to find the word he was looking for, ". . . this purely Shounen Ai moment but ummm . . ." he sucked on a tooth, as he squinted at them, "I. Really. *Need*. To. Go."  
  
Touya rolled his eyes, as Yue squinted incredulously at Keroberos, "You only just went!" Touya was discreetly doing the clasp back up, hoping Kero wouldn't notice and, for that matter, Yue, because the guardian looked flushed and ready to kill.  
  
Keroberos smiled falsely as he tried to come up with an excuse, "I've . . . been drinking . . . a lot of . . . fluids . . . it's good for you I'm told . . ."  
  
Touya sighed and pushed himself up; he glanced promisingly at Yue before slipping out the door. Yue threw himself back against the bed, his large wings and long hair spreading gently over the soft sheets and groaned, "Stupid Touya!"  
  
  
  
  
  
-----------------------  
  
And Now It's Time For LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!!  
  
DrM: Konnichiwa!! I'M BAAACK!!!  
  
Yue: You took your dear, sweet time, didn't you?!  
  
Writer's Block: [Smug] Uh, yeah, that would be my fault . . . [Puts feet on desk and folds arms behind head] damn . . . I'm good at this . . .  
  
Real Life: [Indignant] Damnit! I had a part to play in it too!  
  
DrM: Damn you both!!! [Falls to knees, much like dude at the end of 'Planet Of The Apes'] Damn you! Damn you all to hell!!! You blew it up! [starts to beat the ground with her fists] Damn you!!  
  
Yue: [Turns to readers] I dunno about you . . . but she scares me . . . not just a little, but a helleva lot.  
  
Clow: Scares me too . . . just wait until she realises that 'The Magical, Mythical, Mischievous, Master Clow' is stuck on [Whispers] *59* reviews . . .  
  
Yue: [Winces] Someone better cover that up before she blows a casket . . .  
  
Hei-ying: [Popping out of nowhere] I agree . . .  
  
Yue: [jumps up and points] WHO THE FECK ARE YOU?!  
  
Hei-ying: I'm an evil, psychotic, homicidal maniac with a obsessive and obscene abnormal fixation on Clow and bent on your slow and preferably pain filled destruction . . . [Grins] Nice to meet you!  
  
Yue: [Understanding] Oooohh. . . You're the dude from 'In This Tainted Soul . . .' [gasps] So it's YOU'RE fault DrM got writer's block on this story!!!  
  
Hei-ying: [still grinning] Yep, and remember . . . [Points at reader, and grins cheesily] Don't ask what this fanfic can do for you . . . Ask what YOU can write in your review . . . [sticks up thumb] Please R&R!!  
  
DrM: [Points at Hei-ying then at self, looks at Yue] And I scare you? He's misquoting American war slogans!  
  
Yue: [Reads last passage] At least he doesn't write such utter mush about *MY* love life . . . [Gets into it with DrM]  
  
Hei-ying: [Grins even more cheesily] Please recite after me: Every Fanfic Writer Has The Right To Life, Liberty And The Pursuit Of Reviews . . .  
  
Touya: Wow . . . [stands back, impressed] That was just one huge, giant, colossal, massive, *SHAMELESS* story plug . . . 


	12. What The Hell Is Sesquideolophobia?

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be!

Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make!

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat.

By Dr Megalomania.

Part Twelve: What The Hell Is Sesquideolophobia?

A few days later . . .

"Neeeeooooooooooowwwww!!"

A spoon piled high with green soup, with bits of what he assumed was dry toast, moved in lazy loops in front of him. He scowled and narrowed his eyes at the latest insult to his dignity.

Keroberos had been getting increasingly frustrated over the last few days. He'd gotten better enough to move around by himself, but he wasn't allowed to fly. He still didn't have enough strength to go through his transformation. So, because of that, he was only allowed to be up and about for a few hours a day. He was getting mighty sick of being walked everywhere. Damnit, he couldn't even take care of his lion's business without someone outside the door asking him every few seconds if he was okay? Did he need any help? He'd put his paw down when Touya suggested that they set up a kitty litter in Sakura's room.  

"Why not Kero?" Sakura had blinked at him in confusion. It sounded like a good idea to her. 

Keroberos had struggled to find the right words to explained to her that there were times when a lion had to take care of his own business and that a real Guardian Beast like him did not *do* his stuff in a kitty litter.

"Neeeeoooowwww! Chug-chug-chug! Bruuuuummmm!" The spoon dipped and soared, and his frown grew deeper. 

Kero sighed, he was also mighty sick of being spoon-fed. He'd thrown up again, it was because Meilin's soup was so inedible he had protested, not because he had finished three helpings in six minutes, but now he was rationed to nothing but dry toast and very small amounts of hot soup. And even that had bits of dry toast mashed up in it . . .

"Neeeeeeeeoooooooooooowwwwwww!! Chitzzzzzz! Kero-chan's breakfast to landing bay! We're ready to land! Over?"

. . . *And* they spoon-fed him so he wouldn't gulp down his food in his normal manner. Much as he loved the idea of the Gaki feeding him at his every beck and call, he did object to Ruby making little plane noises. "Wheeeeee!!" Ruby squealed happily, "Open up wide Kero-chan, here comes the airplane!"

Kero growled threateningly as she nudged the spoon against his lips.

Downstairs . . .

"You know what?" Syaoran said as he and Sakura pulled off their training gear, Tomoyo had slipped back into her old ways and had been providing Sakura with varied outfits for her early morning bouts, how she did it was beyond everyone. And when asked where or when she found the time to create these masterpieces, she just smiled and asked if anyone wanted tea.

"What?" Asked Eriol, he had been getting much more like his old self, he wasn't as worried about Keroberos anymore. He could sense that the old guardian's power levels were reaching their optimum.

"I think Keroberos is better, I mean, I think he isn't ill anymore." Syaoran untied his orange sash; his white slacks were muddied again. But that wasn't his fault; Sakura's latest attempt to get him to admit defeat against her had her chasing after him on the back of the Rain's rain cloud. The back garden was filled with two feet's worth of water before he had tricked her into running into a wall.

Sakura peeled off her wet gloves and handed them to the ever-helpful Mirror card, "That's good, because then life can return to normal." 

"What do you mean 'normal'?" Touya carried the laundry basket into the kitchen to pick up the pair's soaked clothes. The Mirror lifted her mistress' clothes into the basket, and yawned. "Mistress . . ." she murmured sadly.

"Mmm . . ." Sakura wrapped an arm around her card, "What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry, but I must return to my card confine . . . I'm getting a little too tired to maintain my form." 

Sakura smiled, and gave the girl a quick hug; "You've been wonderful, thank you for all of your help. Please don't feel guilty about needing some sleep."

Touya gave the Mirror one last nod and smiled faintly, as the girl smiled weakly at him. She returned to her card form and floated back to Sakura's hand. Sakura held her card close to her chest before turning to her brother. "I mean normal like . . . our life is normal." She shrugged.

"Excuse us . . ." the group spun to find two elderly cards standing in the doorway, the Return and the Time. "We'd like to ask Kinomoto-san a question please . . ." 

While the two approached them, the Dash card, the Change card and the Freeze card ran . . . well, the Freeze card sorta flopped a little. . . past the doorway, they were being chased by the Create card, essentially, by a giant book which was crashing end over end. This fairly random display was followed by the Jump card, which took a wrong turn and bounced into the kitchen, it ricocheted off a couple of walls until Syaoran got sick of it's bouncing and held up a frying pan.

**BAM!!**

As the Jump card slip down the pan, the Dream card fumbled her way into the room. "Excuseth the intrusion . . . however . . . A little help?" She painfully walked into a couple of walls before the Return turned and lifted the dream's hat off her eyes. "Arigato!" She said brightly as the world was revealed to her. The Return turned back to her conversation with Touya and the Time. "Basically young sire, we willt desire to knowth the true nature of thy acquaintance wit'. . ."

Touya held up a hand to them, and turned to Sakura, "And you call this normal?!" He sighed and shook his head, "What in the hell are they saying?"

"Oh. . ." Eriol nodded knowingly, "It's ye olde English."

"How old's that?" Syaoran asked.

"We've been through this. . ." Eriol quickly grabbed Syaoran's cheek and pulled it annoyingly, ". . . My cute little descendant." He let go and turned back to Touya, "They basically want you to settle an old dispute between them; they want to know if you really ever got it on with Kaho, or if it was a figment of your crazed hormones . . ."

Touya's eyes widened, he snapped his head towards the two gossipy cards. "Thy can kissth my buttocks!" He pointed out the door, "GET—"

He paused as the Dash, the Change and the Freeze ran . . . well, the Freeze sort just flopped a little . . . past the door, the Create card crash end over end after them. The Jump shook it's head, and ran after them, misjudge the width of the door, and crashed into the wall, it shook itself again and ran out the door. "Oh golly! They're at it again!" Cried the Dream card and ran out of the room, followed quickly by the Time and the Return, who had begun to bicker about who was right. 

"And I repeat myself . . . you call this normal?"

Meilin scratched her head; "I thought that the cards couldn't operate by themselves . . ."

"They can't." Eriol murmured.

"Then why are they . . .?"

"Well, it's not like they are using their powers . . ." Eriol shrugged, "Besides they're free spirits, let them stretch their . . ." The Freeze flopped by again, followed by the Create. " . . . Legs . . ."

"GAAAAAAARGGAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!" Keroberos yelled.

Yukito, who had been silently chomping away at his breakfast, sat bolt up right. The transformation took place quickly, and when the glow died down, Yue started to choke. Touya leapt over to slam his palm down on moon guardian's back. "Just don't fight it!" he advised, "Try to swallow."

Still coughing, Yue swivelled in his seat, and eyed Touya with incredibility written all over his face. He shook his hands at the foot long club sandwich that Yuki had been eating for breakfast, which was lodged in his mouth. Touya nodded in understanding and lifted the large sandwich out of the guardian's mouth. "Let me give you a hand with that . . ."

Once the large sandwich had been dislodged from Yue's mouth, he flew up the stairs as quickly as he could; Keroberos' voice nearly shook the walls.

"ARRRRRGAAAAHHHHH!!! KILL! MAIM!! DESTROY!!" Keroberos screamed at the top of his lungs, "I DON'T CARE HOW YOU DO IT, JUST DEPART THIS LIFE! BREATHE YOUR LAST! GO MEET YOUR MAKER . . . THEN TAKE THE HALF BLOODY REINCARNATION WITH YOU! ARRAAAAGGAAAAA!!!"

Sakura and Yue the first to get upstairs found Ruby moon standing outside Sakura's bedroom covered head to nail-polished toe with Keroberos' breakfast. Keroberos was still screaming abuse at her, "THAT'S IT!! I'VE HAD ENOUGH! I CANNOT TAKE IT ANYMORE!!! I'M BETTER, AND I'M GOING TO STAY BETTER . . . JUST DON'T MAKE ME HAVE TO SIT THROUGH BREAKFAST WITH RUBY!!"

Sakura walked hesitantly into the room, "Ke-Kero-chan. . .?" She ventured quietly.

Keroberos was sitting bolt upright in his bed, a mixture of his own and the pillow's feathers floating all around him, "I can't take it anymore!" He growled as he ripped up another pillow, "I can't! I won't! Enough is enough is enough! No more soup, no more dry toast, no more I tell you! Enough!"

"Keroberos!" Yue stepped into the room, "much as it amuses me to see Ruby covered in your food, you will cease this needlessly destructive scene this moment."

Keroberos panted as he paused and glared at Yue, "I can *not* do this being sick thing anymore! I am well enough to take on the Fight card powered by the Power card, and-and-and-and AND DAMNIT!! SOMEONE BRING ME PUDDING!!" He extended his sharp claws and started to rip another pillow. "ARRRRGAAAAAHHHHH!!!"

Tomoyo and the rest of the gang arrived in time to see Yue and Sakura back slowly out of the room, "I think we should just leave him for a few moments . . ." Yue suggested wisely, Sakura nodded her agreement and shut the door on her raging sun guardian. "Hoeee!"! She sighed as she slid down the door. There was a muffled crash as her head fell into her knees. As Meilin, Tomoyo, and Syaoran went to comfort Sakura, Spinel quietly cleared his throat twice and held his paw up to Eriol, who rolled his lavender grey eyes and dug into his pocket. "How did you know?" He eyed his sun guardian's stuffed toy self.

Spinel smiled, "I've been fed breakfast by Ruby before . . . I just knew he would do it . . ." Eriol dumped a crisp two thousand Yen note into Spinel's paw, "Thank you very muchly!" He quickly folded the note and slipped it into his . . . his . . . "Can you hold on to this for me?" He handed the note back, "I don't have any pockets."

Ruby sniffed pathetically, and threw herself at Touya. "He threw his breakfast at me!"

"Really?" Touya said sweetly, "And I just thought you had begun to see some fashion sense . . ."

She moaned aloud, "To-YAAAA!! You'll just have to take me into the bathroom and clean me!! " She sobbed heartily into his chest, and got Touya equally covered in the messy slop. "Oh!" Her head jerked back as if she was only just realising what she was doing. "Oh dear!" Ruby tried to sound disappointed, "Did I do that? C'mon, we can clean each other in the shower."

Touya winced, as Ruby tried to drag him into the bathroom. He winced because Keroberos wasn't the only one getting frustrated over the last few days. Since the lion had interrupted them, Yue *and* Yukito had both been dropping fairly broad hints to Touya that the combined being was . . . well, suffice to say, someone hadn't been getting any and, unlike Meilin, that someone *did* mind. 

Yue was in front of them in a nano-second. His eyes narrowed as he glared at Ruby, the two moon guardians exchanged a heated glare. Ruby clamped her hands tighter on Touya's arm, her sharp pink nails digging deeper into his tanned flesh. Yue's eyes flashed, and he jerked his head towards Sakura's door. Sakura fell backwards unexpectedly, as the door flung itself open and the Rain card bobbed into view. "HOEE!"

Ruby looked at the Rain, who giggled and bounced happily on her little cloud, then Ruby whipped her head back towards Yue, who had folded his arms and had raised his customary eyebrow. "Oh no. . .!"

Yue nodded.

"No." Ruby shook her head.

Yue glared passed her to the Rain, and then nodded his head at Ruby. The Rain quite merrily raced over to position herself over Ruby. Ruby looked up, "Yue. . . you wouldn't dare. . ." She uttered, then looked at Yue, who cocked his head in a manner that said 'don't insult me! Of course I would!'. 

"You bastar—Gurgle!" A thick downpour of water cut off Ruby.

He waited for a few minutes, before Yue nodded at the Rain card, the tiny cute rain girl giggled once more then turned back to her card form. Ruby coughed, and glared at him hotly. "I can't believe you did that."

Yue raised an eyebrow, "Well, now you're clean . . ." he yanked Touya's arm out of her clutches, "*I* shall help Touya get sparkly fresh . . ."

And with that the frisky moon guardian pulled a grinning Touya quickly into the bathroom. 

Eriol quietly cleared his throat twice and held his palm up to Spinel, who rolled his azure blue eyes.  "How did you know?" He eyed his midnight blue haired creator.

Eriol smiled, "I used to . . . I mean, Clow used to sleep with Yue . . .we were always at it, we were like . . ." Eriol blushed slightly, "Well, let's just say there's a reason why Yuki was called 'rabbit' . . ." 

Spinel winced, then contorted his face as his imagination took a hold, he narrowed his eyes; "Do I even want to know about it?"

Eriol turned to look at him and raised his eyebrows in two short, sharp, suggestive motions, "I can't help it . . . it was *always* very good . . ." Spinel's eyes narrowed even further, and Eriol sniggered quietly, "I just knew he would snap . . . sooooo?" He clicked his fingers in Spinel's face, and cleared his throat again.

Spinel nodded grudgingly, Eriol grinned as he snapped the two thousand Yen note in his sun guardian's face. "Thank you . . . *very*much!"

A little while later. . .

Meilin and Ruby were out in the garden again; Ruby going into bitchy over-drive, and Sakura was carrying a tray of tea and biscuit up the stairs. "Hey, let me give you a hand with that!"

Syaoran rushed up the stairs after her, Sakura laughed, "It's okay, I can do it myself."

"But I want to help!" They paused on the stairs, as Syaoran held his hand out.

Sakura squinted at him thoughtfully, "Shouldn't you be sleeping?"

"For what?"

"Your shift tonight." 

Syaoran clasped his hands behind his back and blushed slightly, "Oh. . . I uh, I swapped with Eriol. . . he really wanted the night shift with Tomoyo, and I uh. . ."

"You're so sweet!" Sakura beamed.

Syaoran smiled at her, she really was cute, he felt another blush building on his cheeks, he quashed it by stepping up another step, "Give me that tray now."

"No." she held the tray out of his reach.

"Give it to me!"

"No!" Sakura giggled softly.

"So. . ." he folded his arms, feeling playful, "You have the Clow tray! I will be collecting the Clow trays from now on, so hand over the tray you are already carrying!"

"I can't!" Sakura smiled, "I promised mackerel-chan I would collect the trays!!"

"Can-of-mackerel? The silver tin packed with the stinky fish? Why is he allowing such a child to carry the trays!"

Sakura gasped, "Unless you haven't noticed, I'm very much a young woman now!" She turned and walked up the stairs, "Sheesh! You're just like my brother, you just haven't notice I'm not a little girl anymore!"

Syaoran paused before he followed her; "Trust me I've noticed."

Touya past the bottom of the stairs, he didn't look up as he sorted through the morning's mail and yelled up, "No, you haven't . . . trust me, you haven't!"

Syaoran blushed and ran up the stairs.

"And so . . . I heroically sacrifice my shift with Sakura to Syaoran, to keep her Royal Genki-ness in a potentially kawaii romantic situation thus I must manfully take my place beside you during tonight's shift . . ." 

"Uh-huh . . ." Tomoyo folded her arms, unconvinced of Eriol's heroic tale. They were cleaning up the sleeping area in the living room together. 

". . . And it just so happens that I know a little spell," he made a motion with his hand, "An off switch if you like, for Keroberos, you and I could . . ." He tutted as if he didn't already have this carefully thought out. "Oh, I dunno, explore the powers of darkness that reside in my wretched reincarnated soul . . ." he beamed brightly at her, "So, did I ever tell you the one about the ferret?"

"No. . ."

"Hmmm. . . Maybe I'll save that one 'til later . . ." he slid behind her and wrapped his arms about her slim waist, "Wouldn't want to corrupt those delicate little ears of yours . . ."

"Is it the one where the barkeep sells him the ferret and the guy takes it home and tells his wife to get lost because—"

Eriol smirked as he watched the smile grow on her lips, "I see you have heard that one before . . . You're not as innocent as you like people to think!"

Now, there aren't many things Kinomoto Touya ever expected to see in this life, such as Eriol and Syaoran being not frustrating little creeps that kept hitting on his sister, or even Tomoyo not filming, or even Nakuru not being gratuitously annoying . . . however, as he strolled into the kitchen to find out the source of the delicious double chocolate cookie smell that had been wafting through out the house since Kero's outburst, he never thought he'd see the day when Yue donned an apron that read: 'Kiss The Cordon Bleu!' . . . he grinned, "What are you doing?" 

Yue stood up, and blinked at Touya, "Baking."

"Baking?"

Yue held up a baking trey filled with cookies, "Baking!" He enthused. 

Touya snickered bemused, "Why?"

"Because Keroberos is better . . . and because I like baking." Yue bent down again and slid another tray of unbaked cookies into the oven.

"Since when?"

"I've always loved baking . . ." Yue raised a sceptical eyebrow, he motioned down his own body, "Do you really think Yukito is the one who can cook in this body?"

Touya smiled and moved closer, and wrapped his arms around Yue. Pecking the moon guardian on the cheek lightly, he murmured, "So, you are the one who keeps making tons of cookies?"

"Not tons," Yue glared at him, "I only make enough for three people . . ." He held up three pale fingers and counted off, "It used to be for me, Clow and Keroberos."

Touya looked at the kitchen table, there was already at least a dozen cooling racks filled with cookies . . . "You never eat . . ."

"Not any more, no." Yue smiled at him, letting him know he was humouring Touya.

"And Clow was human, right?"

"Mmm-hmm." Yue hummed as he turned back to the oven and slid a new tray in.

"And Keroberos can't eat that much . . ." Touya squinted at Yue, " . . . Can he?"

Yue stood and rested a hand on his hip; he cocked his head and looked at Touya, as if he was assessing the taller boy. "You really haven't lived with him have you?" Yue cocked an eyebrow, "I once made three thousand shrimp rolls and I turned my back for five minutes . . ." he raised his hand and wiggled his fingers, "Five minutes and do you know how many shrimp rolls I had left when I turned around?"

"Two thousand and forty-seven?"

Yue snorted, "I wish! When I turned back to the shrimp rolls, I found I had *no* shrimp rolls to speak of and Clow accused me of being lazy and not making dinner!" he rolled his flour dusted hands one over the other in front of him, "Never mind Keroberos was virtually rolling out of the door because he was so fat!" Yue turned and slide yet another batch of the cookies into the oven.

Touya sniggered as he moved slyly towards the table; "I bet that was a sight!"

"Oh, yeah, so will your hand be—" Yue turned quickly and shook an oven glove at Touya, "If you *touch* those cookies before they're done!"

Eriol sighed as he closed his eyes . . . and travelled to a land far, far—well, actually just the inside of his mind . . .

"Clow!"

"Mmmm?"

"Kero's better now . . ."

"Oh . . ." Clow smiled at him falsely, "That's, um, good for, er, him!" He rested back in his window seat and commenced his reading. Eriol sighed and moved closer.

"Don't you have something to share?"

"Oh?" Clow looked around him, "Oooh! Yeah . . ." he picked up the small platter, "Have a cookie!" Eriol fold his arms. Clow raised a questioning eyebrow, and his glass, "Milk?" Eriol raised an eyebrow; Clow glanced at his hands, and held up the book. "Book?"

"You know exactly what I mean!"

"Oh . . ." Clow rolled his eyes and slouched further into his seat, "You mean . . . That . . ."

"Yes, that!"

"I'll do it tomorrow . . ." Clow waved his hand dismissively.

"That's what you said about the book explaining everything you need to know about Yue . . ." Eriol climbed into the window seat, and sat opposite Clow, "You know, the one that would tell everyone about how to take on the Judgement Maker?"

Clow looked at his desk, "It's sitting right there on my desk . . ."

"That's not going to help anyone, Clow!" Eriol spammed his forehead, "You're dead, your desk doesn't exist anymore and on top of that THIS IS MY HEAD!!"

"My desk doesn't exist anymore?! I loved that desk!" Clow cried in disappointment, "What happ—wait!" He gasped and pointed accusingly at his half reincarnation, "I left it to you! What did you do with my desk?!"

"It wasn't my fault it wasn't Spinel Sun proof . . ." Eriol rolled his eyes, and made sweeping motions with his hands, "I can't help it when my guardians were teething . . . wait, I'm supposed to be telling you off!" He frowned and pointed back at Clow, "Will you tell them now and get it over and done with?!"

Clow sighed and slowly rolled out of the window seat, "If I must . . . Geez Louise, you're worse than that Tomoyo girl. . . which by the way. . ." He shook a fuming finger at his younger self ". . . you are a very unscrupulous old man! Evidently my sense of morality wasn't past down to you! You're older than her by--"

Eriol pressed a finger against his lips, "Shh!"

Syaoran nearly skipped down the stairs, Sakura loved him, and he loved her . . . he almost felt like singing. He grinned broadly, "I love Sakura!" He murmured to himself.

"Kawaii!!" Tomoyo squeaked from the bottom of the stairs, "You're so sweet!"

"Don't you ever stop?" Syaoran shook his hands at her pleadingly.

Tomoyo blinked and looked around her camera, "Stop?"

"Yes, cease, desist, halt, end, discontinue, finish your filming . . ."

"Stop filming?" Tomoyo's eyes widened, and he could have been wrong, but he thought he could see tears brimming. 

Syaoran raised one of his deep dark eyebrows, "Yes, turn off the camera."

"Turn off?" Tomoyo looked aghast, her camera seemed to start to tremble in mortal fear.

"Switch off, cease the power flow, put the camera down." He motioned with his hands.

"Put the camera down?" Tomoyo instinctively held the camera closer. Syaoran winced, Tomoyo did truly not comprehend what he was saying, "Surely you put the camera down when you are editing the tape?"

"Oh, yeah, but that's when I'm watching the tape . . ." she snorted in laughter, "Put down the camera . . . that's such a bizarre notion!"

She laughed as they entered the living room together, Meilin looked up. "Hey, do either of you guys know if . . ." she glanced down at the scribble board, and read slowly, " . . .Sesquideolophobia is actually a word?"

Tomoyo and Syaoran blinked, glanced at each other and then stared at the red-eyed girl.

"Well, that was fairly random . . ." Syaoran muttered, "Why do you wanna know what . . . what did you just say?"

"Sesquideolophobia." Spinel smiled, Ruby stared at him.

"You're making it up!" She accused. "You have to be!"

"I am not!" Spinel sniffed haughtily.

Ruby folded her arms obstinately, "Are too!" 

"Am not!" He roared back.

"Are too!" Meilin and Ruby yelled at him, Meilin turned to the others, "That's the second word he's used during this game that we've never heard of!"

Spinel smiled, "Just because I am so intellectually superior, doesn't mean I should compensate for your inanity." 

"There you go again!" Ruby blinked and pointed her finger at him accusingly, "Stop it! Stop talking like that!"

He chuckled as he smugly started to total his word score. Meilin turned to Syaoran, "Seriously, is that word?"

"Yes, it is. . ." Eriol opened an eye, "It's a very silly word, but it's definitely a word . . ."

"All right smarty-pants . . ." Syaoran folded his arms and glared at the half recreation, "What the hell is sesquideolophobia?"

Eriol chuckled slightly, and closed his eyes again, "Sesquideolophobia . . . my endearing diminutive progeny, is an authentic medicinal idiom defining the condition held by a minority of persons within the populace, a distinct apprehension of elongated prose, an inexplicable trepidation of protracted communication in print, the zealous repugnance of magnanimous composed expressions . . ." he smiled as he drew a breath and added quickly, ". . . or to the layman, the insane fear of long words . . ." 

"What?! What . . . What . . . are you?" Meilin stood and leant over him, "Seriously, what are you? A British phrase book?"

"No. . ." Eriol chuckled, "Just a meticulous re-embodiment of the exquisite, mythological, roguish Clow Reed."

Meilin's mouth hung open, she raised a finger as if she was going to tell him off, but then thought better of it. She turned slowly and said to Ruby, "I'd smack him upside the head . . . if I didn't think he'd start talking again . . ."

Ruby snorted, "You've only been here with him for two weeks . . . Damnit, I've lived with him for—"

"Your go, Ruby!" Spinel chucked the bag of letters at her. The heavy bag hit her squarely in the middle of her forehead. 

"Ouch!"

As Ruby and Spinel argued, and Syaoran and Meilin dug out a dictionary to look up 'sesquideolophobia', Tomoyo turned to Eriol. He looked very concentrated. "Hiirawagizawa-kun?"

He smiled to let her know he had heard her, but didn't open his eyes, "Hiirawagizawa-kun?" He smiled again and turned his head away, she giggled, "Fine then, Eriol?"

"Hai!" Eriol's lavender-grey eyes popped open, "How can I help you o, most beauteous one?" 

Tomoyo smiled, "I've been meaning to ask you . . ."

"Of course, I can bring you breakfast in the morning!"

"Pardon me?"

"Oh, sorry," he took her hands, and pulled them up, he looked sincerely into her violet eyes, "Yes, my darling . . . I will respect you in the morning . . ."

Tomoyo cocked her head; "Actually, I was going to ask what was the true nature of *your* affiliation with Kaho? It seems a little bizarre that you hook up with such an older woman."

Eriol blinked and looked at her bemusedly, "Older woman?" He laughed, as Ruby started to noggie Spinel.

Tomoyo stared at him keenly, "Yes, older woman."

He wasn't paying her his full attention as he answered, "How can she be the older woman when I'm well over a—"

Syaoran's ear suddenly twitched, Eriol clapped his hands over his mouth as Tomoyo raised interested eyebrows. "Sorry, what was that?"

Eriol suddenly started to cough and that cough started to turn into a choke, soon Eriol was being pushed out of the door by Spinel and Ruby, who shouted over their shoulders, "Just gonna perform the Heimlich manoeuvre on the ol' creator here. . . don't mind us!"

"Thanks!" Eriol smiled at his guardians as they turned to return to their game, "That was a close one. . ." he muttered.

"What were you going to say?!" Syaoran popped up from behind him, earning a very un-Eriol like squeak.

"AHH!" Eriol clutched his chest and panted, "Where did you come from?!"

Syaoran smiled, "I've been taking lessons from the master . . ."

Eriol blushed, "Aww . . . I'm not a master! Well, I am but . . ."

"Who says I've been taking lessons from you, I'm talking about Yamazaki!" He glowered at Eriol, "Now, what were you about to say? Well over a hundred? A thousand?!" 

Eriol started towards the kitchen, Syaoran following him keenly, "Huh? Huh? What were you about to say?!"

Eriol paused and turned, "If I tell you how old I am, will you leave me alone?"

Syaoran eyed him, "Yes. . ."

"Fine then," Eriol folded his arm, "I am precisely--- My god! Sakura! That is a very sexy bellybutton ring! When did you get that?!"

Eriol grinned as Syaoran, gullible as ever, turned instantly. When there was no sign of Sakura sporting a very sexy bellybutton ring at the stairwell, he slapped his forehead and turned back to where Eriol had been. The only sign that the little creep had ever been there was a rapidly disappearing puff of sparkling lilac smoke. 

Syaoran growled and went back into the living room, at least he knew that he could catch Eriol unawares, although keeping him in one place . . . now that was a challenge.

-----------------------

And Now It's Time For LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!!

DrM: Konnichiwa!!

Kaho: What is it you have against me?

DrM: You're icky! You dated Touya when he was . . . by my estimations, *15* . . . and then . . . if I'm right about the end of CCS, you go back to England with Eriol!! Ewwww!!

Eriol: You do realise that I'm actually the older by. . .

DrM: Oh shush you or. . . no Tomoyo scenes!

Eriol: [gasps] NO!

DrM: Yes! Think about it carefully! [Smiles] I'm glad to announce that TMMMMC. . .

Clow: The one about the guardians . . . Wait, they are all about the guardians . . . Okay, okay, the one with those initials . . .

DrM: You finished?

Clow: No, not really but . . . yeah, I'm good.

DrM: Where was I? 

Yue: Please read and review?

DrM: Oh yeah!! Please R&R!! Please? Pwetty please!! Thank you!!!


	13. I Have A Bun In The Oven

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be!

Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make! AND apologies for the Joan Collins pun, it was originally about the Queen Mother but one of our Princess', Princess Margaret, died on Saturday, R.I.P Margo!

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat.

By Dr Megalomania.

Part Thirteen: I Have A Bun In The Oven

[p.s – All the Touya/Yue here is completely dedicated to MorganD. (Read her fics! they are soooo good!) you did ask for it!]

Eriol sighed a brief sigh of relief as he reappeared, "Safe!"

He glanced around the kitchen, there were at least sixteen racks of cooling cookies lining the counters, he looked at the oven, which held a further three batches. Finally his gaze fell upon the kitchen table, Yue was sitting there, head rested on his folded arms. He looked completely exhausted.

"Yue?"

"Shh!" Touya stood from behind one of the counters, "He's asleep!"

"Oh. . ." Eriol looked at Yue, the pale angel looked more than slightly drained, it didn't help any that the night would be a new moon. "How long . . .?"

"Since about an hour now," Touya pulled the oven door open, "I haven't had the heart to wake him. . . hmmm. . . These are almost done." He pulled the trays out slowly, "What are you doing here?"

"I just wanted to check where Yue was . . ." Eriol walked softly over to his moon guardian, he lay a hand on the pearly white hair, "Now Keroberos is better, I think it's about time we started to pack up camp . . ."

"Hmmm. . . I got a letter from our father, he say the expedition are encountering even more delays . . . he might not be back for another month . . ."

"He's having the time of his life!" Eriol grinned.

Touya eyeballed him, "How do you know?"

Eriol smiled knowingly, "He and I are connected . . . I can feel his thoughts and emotions . . ."

"Really?" Touya scoffed, "And how can you prove that?"

"I could tell you about the time he found you rolling naked on his lecture notes and squealing---"

"Thank you very much!" Touya shoved him out of the door.

Eriol laughed and shook his head, and walked towards the stairs.

Sakura smiled, as Keroberos' deep purr rumbled across his now clear chest. He sounded perfectly healthy to her, as she held a large beaker of cool water to his mouth. He lapped at it contently, his temper had been soothed as Tomoyo assured him that their watches over him were purely observational, and that in a few more days if there were no upsets he would be discharged and free to resume his daily life of mind altering video games, bad daytime TV and hourly pudding and snackings. Sakura smiled again, their life would begin again normally and she would never have to worry about her guardians falling ill ever again.

Thunder cracked outside the window. 

"Hoe?" Sakura blinked, as the rain pounded down and the storm moved closer. Eriol stepped into the room, and stared out the window.

"That's not my fault, are you letting the Storm card out?"

"Nope. . ."Sakura shrugged, "Must be natural. . ."

Eriol smiled, and sat beside Keroberos, "How are you feeling, old man?"

"I'm not old and I feel fine!"

"Good, good!" He petted the lion, "Well, this is the last day my guardians and I will be staying. . . I feel we have imposed on your hospitality long enough. . ."

Sakura blushed; "No, it's all right! It has been interesting, I've learnt things about everyone I never knew. . ."

"Such as Yue's twitch!" Keroberos snickered.

"And your painting abilities!" Sakura scratched between his ears.

He sat up slightly, "How. . .?"

Eriol smiled, "I still have Clow's diary. . . he kept a lot of paintings from you and Yue in it. . ."

Kero snorted, "Of course he did. . . mine are masterpieces!"

A serious glint took over Eriol's eyes, "Kero. . . Clow has something to tell you before we leave. . ." 

"Nani?" Kero blinked, "Like what?"

Eriol smiled, "No. . . Wait until Yue wakes, then I want you to join me in the kitchen . . . it's about the both of you . . ."

Three hours later, Kero padded down the stairs. The storm had grown worst and it was pelting down. He wondered what it was that Eriol had to tell Yue and him. What did Clow have to tell them . . .? He gasped, as he quickened his pace, //Maybe it's that secret recipe to making the perfect pudding!!//he stepped into the living room. It was now clear of the bedding, and the sleeping bags, Meilin and Syaoran were in their battle costumes as Tomoyo inspected the age-old clothes. "Hmmm. . . Syaoran, your sleeves are going to need a little work and. . ." She looked over Meilin's, ". . . so will yours, your bells could do with a small bit of tightening." 

The sound of footsteps made him turn, Ruby, Spinel and Eriol were descending the stairs, also in their normal robes. "Is that everything?" Eriol called to them.

"Yes!" Spinel mumbled around his bag, he stopped in front of Kero, "How are you feeling?"

"Like I could beat the stuffing out of you and Ruby anytime any place." 

"Oooh. . . I didn't know that being so ill could turn you into a competent guardian!" Spinel smiled slightly and nipped at Kero's ear affectionately. "Welcome back!"

Kero smiled as he returned the gesture, "Thank you. . ."

Ruby dumped her bag in the hallway, it was almost up to her hip. "So. . . Goldie, how ya doin'?"

"As I was telling your brother. . . I could take you on easy!"

"That's good to know. . ." Eriol smiled as he placed his bags in the hallway next to Ruby's oversized rucksack, he looked at it then at Ruby, "Ruby, sweetie . . . that's not how big your bag was when we arrived . . ."

Ruby was about to answer when there was a shout from upstairs interrupted her, "Ruby!!"

"What?"

Touya came pounding down the stairs, "Where has my clothes gone?!"

"What clothes?" Ruby blinked at him sweetly.

"My entire underwear drawer has been *ransacked*!"

"And what's to say I did it?"

All eyes fell on her oversized rucksack, "Oh come on! That's *circumstantial* evidence!"

Eriol chuckled, as he patted Kero's head, "Please . . . accompany me to the kitchen?"

They pushed the door open; Yue paused in his icing to glance at them. "Kero? What are you doing up?"

Keroberos blinked, Yue looked very, very pallid. Even for a new moon night. 

"Shouldn't I be asking you that? You look awful!"

Yue turned back to his icing, "I'm fine. . . it's just the new moon. . ."

Eriol shook his head and sat at the table, he sighed and clasped his hands in front of him as he closed his eyes. When he opened them again, it was clear Eriol wasn't exactly Eriol anymore. "Yue? Kero? Please. . . have a seat. . ."

Yue and Kero exchanged glances as Kero jumped up on to a seat and Yue leaned on to the kitchen counter, "I have a bun in the oven. . ." he said as Clow raised a questioning eyebrow.

Clow, desperately resisting the urge to make a joke about Yue and his bun and then run away, sighed, "Oh, all right then . . ." he clear his throat, "Um . . . you remember the night I died. . .?" 

Touya grumbled quietly to himself as he escorted Ruby out of his room, "Now. . . my underwear is my underwear and not yours got it?"

"Can't I just keep the black silk--?"

"No!"

"Why not?"

Touya rolled his eyes, "Yuki gave them to me!"

"Oh. . ." she sighed, "are you sure you wouldn't rather have someone more vibrant than the Snow Rabbit and Mister Personality Disorder?"

"Yes."

"But-"

"No!"

"But-"

"I said no!"

She sighed, "Fine then!"

"Thank you!"

They passed his sister's room, Sakura was fast asleep on her bed, and Syaoran had joined her. He lay beside her, one giant floppy gold and green sleeve almost completely covering her frail frame. Touya smiled, and Ruby sighed, "Now wouldn't you like to be like them . . .?"

"No!"

"But-!"

"I said no!" he pushed her hard and they continued down the stairs.

Meilin smiled, "You're pretty good at this!"

Tomoyo smiled as she sewed the bell on tightly, "Lots of practice."

"From making Sakura's costumes?"

Tomoyo nodded, "I love making her happy . . . she's so—"

"Kawaii! I know, Syaoran hasn't been able to talk about her to his sisters without uttering that word at least a billion times . . ." she rolled her eyes good naturally, "I'm glad they finally got it together!"

Tomoyo paused, "Really?"

Meilin winked at her, "It's the same sorta thing you had when you realise ol' cherry blossom wasn't . . . *that* way inclined . . ."

Tomoyo blushed slightly, "Oh . . ." 

Meilin laughed, "Boy, it'll be good to go back to the way things were . . . this has gone on for far to long as it is!"

Tomoyo smiled and chuckled, "I can't wait to start editing my films!"

There was a loud crash from the kitchen, as the door suddenly sprang open, Yue ran out and sped out into the corridor, Keroberos was hot on his heel. "Yue! Yue, come back!"

The two girls blinked, "What the. . .?" Meilin murmured.

Touya and Ruby stood in the middle of the stairs as a white blur of feathers and hair steamed past them, they blinked, and Ruby turned to Touya. "What was that?"

"That was Yue!" Kero panted from the bottom of the stairs, "Someone go after him please!" 

"Why--?"

"PLEASE!!" Kero shouted before passing out, the run had exhausted him already.

Sakura frowned in her sleep as a strong aura rushed past her sense, she opened her eyes to see her room was empty but the window was wide open.

Touya stumbled into her room, "Kaijuu? Where's Yue?"

"Yue? I only just woken up . . . what happened?" 

But Touya wasn't listening to her; he leaned out the window and shouted, "Yue?!"

She blinked as Ruby carried Kero in, he was panting deeply. "What happened?"

"I don't know . . ." Ruby sounded unnerved, "Yue just ran past us and Kero passed out at the bottom of the stairs."

Tomoyo and Meilin ran in, and Syaoran awoke, "What's going on?" The three asked at the same time.

Spinel padded in, followed by a very sad looking Eriol. He hung his head, "I'm so sorry . . . I thought I broke it to him gently . . ."

"What?" Sakura looked at him.

Eriol didn't answer, "Someone should go after him . . ."

Touya looked up, he could sense that Yue was sitting on the roof. He sighed, "Everyone stay here, I'll deal with this . . ."

He didn't care about the rain, he didn't care about the cold, he didn't care that he was beyond tired. His master had died on them . . . on purpose! He clutched his knees closer to his chest; Clow had left him on purpose. He didn't die by accident, or by natural causes he died because he wanted too . . . 

"Yue?"

The rain suddenly stopped, he looked up. Touya's large blue umbrella covered him. "That's pretty pointless," Yue murmured, "I'm already soaked . . ."

Touya sat beside him gently, "What happened?"

"Clow talked to us . . ."

"And wasn't that good?"

Yue's face creased up, he was so tired, and he was so cold, and wet, and drained emotionally. "He said he didn't die because of the cold . . . he had the power to get better the whole time he was sick!"

Touya wrapped an arm around the shivering moon guardian, "He obviously regretted it . . . Eriol's down there right now on the verge of tears . . ."

"Then why did he do it?!"

"All things die . . . it's part of the natural cycle. . ."

"But we're not natural! Clow wasn't—"

"He was human, wasn't he?"

"Yes but—"

"And it must have hurt to see all his friend and family die all round him, knowing that he would survive them all. . ."

"He had Keroberos. . . he had the cards. . ." Yue spread his wings and covered them from the harsh rain. "And he had me!"

"No human wants to live forever. . ." 

"What about Joan Collins?"

"Pardon me?"

"Sheesh! the woman just won't give in! then again. . ." Yue paused reflectively ". . . I don't think she's human anymore . . . and then there's Darth Vader!"

"Darth Vader is a fictional character. . . and he's a jedi!" 

"But-!"

"Yue, look I know you're upset. . ."

"He left me. . . because he was bored of us."

"No. . . he left you because he knew you had to move on. . ."

"On to what?"

"If Clow was still around, and that's excluding Eriol and my father, would you have even dreamt of giving Sakura a fair chance at defeating you?"

"I tried to be as harsh at her as I could!"

"Yes you did, but at no time did you try anything underhanded . . . you didn't try and cheat her."

"I didn't . . ." Yue looked down, "but Clow . . ."

"I'm not as powerful as he was . . . and I can't promise I'll live forever, but I love you."

Yue's eyes flickered up at him, "I'm sorry . . . I love you as well; I should try and remember that before going on about how much I miss Clow, huh?"

Touya smiled, "Yuki once told me that it would be nicer to have loved and lost and found new love with him, rather than just being lost . . ."

"That doesn't make a word of sense," Yue snorted; "then again Yuki never makes any sense. He's just one huge oxymoron . . ."

"Well, oxymoron or not, I love him, and you. . . a lot." He brushed a kiss over Yue's lips, "And I mean a lot."

"What did you say?"

Eriol turned away from the window to face Sakura; she looked . . . not exactly angry, more on the disappointed side. "You told them, didn't you?"

Eriol sighed, and glanced at Keroberos, the lion's new health was still fragile and the weeks of non-exercise left him lacking. "Yes, I did . . ."

"Couldn't you have waited?" Syaoran folded his arms, "You couldn't have waited at least until the full moon, and the storm had gone?"

"If I didn't tell them now, I seriously doubt Clow would have plucked up the courage to tell them later."

Sakura nodded, part of her agreed, but another thought it was a little cruel of him to tell them just as they were recovering from such a serious shock. She looked at Kero, Tomoyo said he had just lost consciousness from lack of air, and that his temperature was still normal. However it was still disconcerting to see the large lion out cold again. She suppressed a shiver; the wind gusted through the open window.

"Here." Meilin wrapped a blanket around her shoulders, Sakura smiled at the black haired girl.

"Thank you!" 

"No problem."

Ruby sat on the windowsill, "I can't take this pansying around anymore . . . they've been up there for an hour!"

Spinel grabbed the white hem of her long skirt, "Give them some time. . . you know Yue is. . . complicated like that. . ."

She sighed and retracted her wings, "I just don't think he's strong enough to maintain his form up there. . ."

Spinel smiled knowingly, "You're worried about Touya, aren't you?"

"No!" Ruby snapped, "I'm really worried about Yue. . . you don't seriously believe that he could manage to maintain his form in this weather do you?!"

Spinel shook his head, "No. . . I don't. . ." he glanced at Sakura and Eriol, "Master?"

Eriol looked up, "Hmm?"

"Permission to go get them. . .? the storm looks like it's taking a turn for the worse. . ."

Eriol glanced at Sakura, "Do you mind?"

"I don't think I want them out there anymore either. . ." she nodded at Eriol's guardians.

-----------------------

And Now It's Time For LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!!

DrM: Konnichiwa!!

Darth Vader: [breathes] how did I . . . [breathes] . . .end up here?

Luke: I don't know. . .

D.V: Luke. . . I am you father. . .

Luke: NOOOOOO!!!

3-CPO: oh my! We have appeared to have stumbled in at a rather bad time! Oh, what are we going to do?

R2-D2: [whistles]

3- CPO: I don't think that would help. . .

R2-D2: [whistles]

3- CPO: no, I don't think that would help either. . .

R2-D2: [whistles]

D.V: DrM! We meet again!

DrM: hey, Darth Vader, my man!! How's the kids? [Hands him a beer and stretches back on couch] And how's it hanging!

D.V: [takes off helmet, cracks open bottle of beer] Well, Luke's going through this phase where he's rejecting me. . . [Both look at Luke, who's still yelling 'NOOOO!!] And. . . I've got A New Hope . . . got a feeling the Empire's gonna Strike Back against the pay cuts . . . although I gotta say I'm not welcoming the Return Of The Jedi . . . 

DrM: [nodding] yeah. . . that Phantom's. . . gawd I tell ya! He's real Menace! 

Clow: what the hell. . .? People, love of sanity, review this girl . . . if only to stop the insanity and the really bad, bad, BAD star wars references!!!

DrM: yeah, please . . . it hurts if you don't! I worked really hard on that last chapter!!


	14. I, um, I, er. . . I’m really. . . I’m re...

Well, hello! And Welcome to My Little World of Weirdness!

I state for the record that, despite the fact I really, really wish I did, I don't own any of the characters that will grace this story; it's all CLAMP's! Always has been, always will be!

Also I don't pretend to have any Mastery over the language of Japanese or any clue as to correct grammatical structure. I put it in and hope it gets across the point I'm trying to make!

"Speaking"

*Stress/emphasis*

//Thinking//

Guardian Beast of the Seal, Wimpy, Scaredy Cat.

By Dr Megalomania.

Part fourteen: I, um, I, er. . . I'm really. . . I'm really, really. . .

[Thanks go out to The PenMaster for finding out Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia . . . no, I can't explain it. . . I suffer from it!! Please read and review!!]

A few hours later . . . in the deep dark recesses of the most powerful book ever created in the history of the mystic origins of mankind . . .

"Order, Order! Now . . . is there any new business?"

"Ahem . . . Yes there is!" the Earthy stood, "It has come to the attention of the elder cards that our beloved Keroberos, guardian beast of the seal has recovered from his illness . . . therefore, not only do our plans for recovery need to be shelved but we can also be assured that none of our guardians will ever fall sick ever again."

The cards all looked up as Thunder cracked . . . 

. . .his knuckles loudly. 

All the cards swivelled to look at the Thunder beast, who cracked his other paw quickly, "What? I haven't cracked them in ages . . . Clow-sama, it must have been well over a—"

The Firey rolled her eyes impatiently, "I dunno about you but I would like to get this CC meeting over and done with please . . ."

"CC?" The Watery folded her arms behind her head and flopped her watery tail on the polished briefing table, "Surely you are not revering to that awful dub from America? What's it called?" 

"Oh! Um. . ." the Big clapped her hands together, "I know what you mean! Um. . . I think, um, I think they call it Card Crap—"

"Ahem!" The Earthy cleared her throat loudly, "Yes well, we all know about that!"

The Fly shook out her wings slightly, "I don't! I don't think I was there when they showed the first episode!"

"Ah ya didn't miss much!" The Thunder beast growled, "Now can we finish up please!"

"Sure, sure. . . now, about the state of our moon guardian. . . has he returned from the roof yet?"

Yue was a mess. A complete unholy mess. His clothes were soaked right through, and being white and not to mention really, really thin . . .

"Clow was a really, really, really, really dirty old man, wasn't he?" Eriol and Syaoran walked along the door to Touya's room, Syaoran eyed his distant relative by default normally . . . I mean, suspiciously.

"What ever do you mean?" Eriol chirped musically.

"Yue's clothes are see-though . . . I don't mean a little bit see-though, I mean . . . he's virtually naked!"

Yue turned suddenly, "I AM NAKED!!!" He yelled before slamming his door shut.

A few hours later, Touya knocked lightly on the door, there was a sniffle and a quiet, "Come in." Touya pushed the door open and found Yue leaning out of the open window, "What are you doing?"

He strained to hear Yue's miserable reply, "Nothing."

Touya closed the door quietly and took in the sight of the miserable moon guardian, Yue, judgement maker that he was, was dressed in Yukito's favourite P.J's, namely cutesy bunny rabbit ones with large fluffy rabbit slippers and a widdle bunny-eared sleeping cap. Yue looked . . . well, what I mean is, he really did look . . . Yue the judgement maker simply looked . . .

"Not a word . . . not a single word, Kinomoto-san . . . or I swear every time you and Yuki get it on, ol' snow bunny-wunny will start clucking like a chicken in labour with an ostriches' egg and doing a great impression of General Kentucky!" 

Touya had to snicker at Yue's deadpan tone, and smiled as he wrapped his arms around Yue's pwetty bunny patterned waist, "But you look so. . ."

"Buck-buck-buckTAK!" 

"But—" Touya would have continued their game but one look at Yue's despondent face advised him not to try it. He rested his chin on Yue's shoulder and they stared out on to the stormy sky together, silently. Touya was a little concerned that Yue seemed a little cooler than usual, but put that down again to the new moon that night, //Yue must be conserving on energy . . .//

Yue sighed, "I loved him, I really loved him . . . and he left me . . ."

Touya would have been really, really romantic and pressed his face into Yue's hair, breathing in the moon guardian's sweet scent of lavender and pure ice, and breathlessly declared that he loved Yue, that he would never leave him . . . then there would be this really romantic bit where Yue would turn and say, 'My god! Your love for me has open my eyes and I have finally seen the light . . . I should stop moping over Clow, he's dead now and there's nothing I can do about it!' and then Touya would be like: 'It's true and I'm so over old Kaho, I realise now that she was a bit of a hentai!' and then in a great bout of completely out of character emotion, he would proudly declare, 'I love you, Yue!'

And then Yue's sparkling eyes would have widened in wondrous shock and dreamy amazement, and then he would have thrown himself into Touya's strong arms and whispered tearfully, 'I love you, Touya!' before Touya would have hauled him up into those big ol' strong arms of his, and carried him swiftly to bed and then there would have been a beautiful, life affirming, deep, meaningful, passionate, worshipful, tender, loving night of glorious sweet nothings and a happy fanfictale ending . . .

Except. . .

Except. . .

Yue had hair curlers in and so Touya didn't particularly feel like poking his eye out today. Instead he silently squeezed Yue tighter, hoping to get across that Yue didn't have to take this alone anymore . . .

With Ruby, Meilin and Spinel taking care of Kero, Sakura and Syaoran slipped off quietly, or at least that's what they thought. "Tomoyo darling . . . sweetie . . . give me the camera . . ."

"What?!"

"Give me the camera please . . . I want a moment alone with you."

Tomoyo cast one more look at Sakura as the honey coloured haired girl blushed as the little wolf wrapped an arm around her small shoulders. They were 'watching' TV, really, they were. Anyway, Eriol eventually pulled Tomoyo away into the sweet smelling kitchen.

"You remember when I promised that if I ever felt like bawling my eyes out like a little girl I would come to you and do it?" He said jokingly, in his usual manner. Tomoyo understood immediately and held her arms out, Eriol smiled ruefully as he gratefully slipped into Tomoyo's warm embrace. "Thank you . . ." he mumbled into her hair, he sniffed, "Hmm . . . is that vanilla?"

Tomoyo chuckled, "Indeed it is . . ."

"I love vanilla." Eriol confessed softly, "It reminds me of home . . ."

"Really?"

"Yeah, my mansion was just downwind of a vanilla ice-cream factory . . ." Eriol held the purple haired girl a little closer as she giggled; he adored her, and was very thankful that she understood him. 

He smiled and closed his eyes, "Tomoyo . . ." he whispered, "I have a confession to make . . ."

"Hai?" Tomoyo turned her head a little to listen to the whispering magician, she felt Eriol smile his rueful smile again.

He pulled away from her slightly and looked her plainly in the eye; "Before I make it . . . I think you should know how old I am . . ."

Tomoyo smiled softly, and placed a pale hand against his cheek, "Over a century?"

Eriol nodded, "Suffice to say old queen Vic was in her proverbial short trousers when I celebrated my twentieth."  

Tomoyo smiled, "That's okay with me . . . although, I'm curious how did you manage to---?"

"Keep this boyish appearance?" Tomoyo nodded and Eriol sucked in a quick breath, "Let's just say my life is just one huge giant plothole. Don't make me have to explain the process."

Tomoyo shook her head, and chuckled, "Never answer a straight question?"

"Never!" Eriol suddenly turned serious, "Do you mind?"

Tomoyo thought about this, then smiled as she made her decision, "No, I don't, why?"

"I, um, I, er. . . I'm really . . . I'm really, really . . ." Eriol looked down and then glanced at her over the rim of his glasses, "I'm very much in love with you . . . and I know this is rather old fashioned of me but I'd like to start . . ." he sighed, and squeezed his eyes shut, "I'd like to start courting you, properly . . ."

The purple haired girl giggled slightly, "You make it sound like a marriage proposal!"

Eriol blushed and looked away, "I wasn't planning to ask you that just yet . . ." he muttered. Tomoyo pulled his face back towards her, and pressed a light kiss over the pale lips of Clow Reed's reincarnation, "Pity . . ." she whispered, "I'd most likely accept it . . ."

He was so stunned, that he didn't manage to pull himself back together until just before she left the room, "Tomoyo, will you . . .?"

"Hai." She paused, her small hand resting on the doorway as she looked back at him.

"Court me?"

She nodded silently. Her affirmation made him feel a little bolder.

"Marry me?"

She smiled, and nodded again, then smiled once more before slipping out of the room. Eriol blushed, then he grinned, then he started to do a silly little victory dance . . . completely unaware his new girlfriend was taping the whole thing.

"Sakura?"

"Hai?"

"I, um, I, er. . . I'm really. . . I'm really, really. . ."

"Haaaai?"

Syaoran drew a deep breath; "You know I really love you right?"

"Hai, I really love you too."

"Really?"

She smiled and turned towards the Chinese boy, she held up her small finger that he immediately linked with his own, she grinned, "Really."

He smiled, and then his eyes seemed to slip a little. Self consciously, she sucked in her bottom lip and smiled slowly, as she watch him repeat her motions. He smiled as well, "You know how you said I hadn't noticed that you were young woman now . . .?"

Sakura didn't trust her voice so she nodded slowly; he smiled and started to pull her towards him gently by her little finger. He didn't stop pulling until she could feel his breath softly on her blushing cheek, his dark eyes flicker up to meet her own wide emerald ones, "Trust me . . ." he whispered, his dark brown eyes sliding shut as he brushed a ghost of a kiss over her lips. "I've noticed . . ."

Sakura couldn't contain the sigh that escaped her lips as she felt Syaoran twist his fingers in her hair and pull her so much closer . . . "I've noticed . . ." he breathed.

**RING!!**

They leapt apart like guilty teens caught in the . . . wait, they *were* guilty teens caught in the act. Syaoran growled slightly as he picked up the phone, "Kinomoto residence!"

He could virtually see the eyebrow rise as Touya's voice said quite sternly, "No you haven't, trust me, you haven't!"

Syaoran blinked, and then stare upward. "How do you do that?!"

"I am the master of the universe . . . I see all . . ."

"I BEG TO DIFFER!!" Eriol's voice yelled from the kitchen. 

Syaoran put the phone down and slapped his forehead, "That was such a perfect moment! Why me?!"

Sakura giggled and pulled his hands into her lap, "I don't know, but it was very well done . . ." she pulled him towards her, "Let's pick up from where we left off. . ."

Eriol glanced at his distant relative as they prepare the night's dinner together. They were going to have one last meal, to celebrate Keroberos getting better, and maybe take Yue's mind off the day's revelations. "You told her!"

"Hmm?" Syaoran paused, as he tasted the soup. He looked at Eriol who folded his arms and leaned against the counter.

"You told her properly didn't you?"

Syaoran blushed and nodded, "Yeah, you?"

Eriol smiled happily, "Yes I did. . ." he sighed, "I can't wait until she's of legal age. . ."

"Why?"

"We'll be getting hitched!" 

"Really?" 

"Yep! She said yes!" Eriol grinned, "It's my first time. . . I've never been so happy!"

Syaoran shook his head, "Congratulations."

"Thank you." Eriol picked up the plates and cutlery, "And you too." 

Syaoran picked up the first course soup, he smiled, "We are very, very lucky men. . ."

"What's luck got to do with anything . . . this was all fate!"

Keroberos glanced at Yue again, the moon guardian looked positively miserable. //He's not taking this very well. . .// he sighed and ladled. . . well, Sakura ladled some more soup into his bowl. Eriol had tried to cheer Yue up, but was failing horrifically. The only persons who managed to get a smile out of the moon angel were Touya and Sakura, but those smiles were fading fast. The table was alternatively happy and quiet, it was no secret that Eriol and Tomoyo, and Sakura and Syaoran were now both happy couples, but Yue's depression prevented Sakura was celebrating much, and Eriol . . . well, Eriol still failed horrifically.

A little later the group settled down in the living, Yue had insisted that he do the dishes alone and Keroberos suggested that this might be a good idea, Yue always took to the kitchen when he need comfort. Touya stayed in the living room partly because he recognised that Yue might need some time alone, and partly because he wanted to keep an eye on a certain Chinese wolf. 

Syaoran and Sakura, despite the slightly imposing company of Touya settled back together on the floor, he was teaching her some random magic tricks, he was knelt behind her as she sat on the floor. Eriol and Tomoyo watched them from the sofa, well Tomoyo did, Eriol was curled up, leaning his head on her shoulder. The blue haired magician murmured some indecipherable nonsense chuckled and lay a gently kiss on her hair.

Spinel, Ruby and Meilin were playing scrabble again, the two girls were determined to beat him. Spinel smiled self-indulgently as they checked his latest word in the dictionary. 

Keroberos bounded down the stairs, "Boy, that was good!" He enthused, he'd gone for a nice little nap, and was now truly better, he grinned as he bounced into the room. "So? Where's Yue?"

"Hm?" Sakura looked up, and giggled slightly as Syaoran whispered his affections into her ear again.

"Where's Yue?" Keroberos repeated, "I might as well sort this out soon or he'll start moping over Clow again."

"What's so bad about that?" Meilin murmured, "Grief is part of the natural life cycle. . . allow him time enough to get over the man!"

Keroberos cocked his head and stared at the red eyed girl, "I tried that once. . . the first time I saw him smile in well over four centuries was shortly after the final judgement. . . I almost had a heart attack! So? Where is he?"

Tomoyo smiled as Eriol's hands grasped hers a little possessively, "I think he's still in the kitchen."

"Sure has been in there a while. . ." Touya peeled his eyes of Syaoran long enough to glance at the door, "Think we should check on him?"

"Nah!" Keroberos muttered, "I'll take him on!"

As Keroberos ambled into the kitchen, Eriol pulled Tomoyo a little closer to him, Touya put his feet up and sniggered as Ruby nearly throttled Spinel for calling her 'a imprudent bamboozled individual with no vogue-related sagacity.' She wasn't attacking him for the insult, but for the way it was delivered.

Meilin continued to search for sesquideolophobia, but was becoming more and more sceptical of it's existence, Spinel coughed quietly, "You might want to try under 'Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia' . . ." when she glared at him he shrugged, "That's it in it's full term. . ."

 Syaoran smiled at his cousin's deliberations and turned his attention on his beautiful cheery blossom. "Well," Sakura leaned back against him, "At least that's over and done with. . . now we will never have to worry about anyone ever falling ill ever again!"

The group looked up as Thunder cracked . . . 

. . .his knuckles again, earning him a slap from the Firey, "Quit with the freaking thunder cracks already!!"

Sakura smiled and shook her head, she closed her eyes and snuggled down with Syaoran, "Indeed, no more worries ever again. . ."

A tranquil quiet settle over the group. 

A quiet which was shattered by Keroberos' yell, his voice was laced with an unfamiliar fear.

"YUE!!"

Touya was the first to react and jogged into the kitchen, Sakura fainted, Syaoran grinned because she fainted into her arms then frowned as he realised that Yue being sick was probably going to be worse than Kero, Meilin's face blanked then she closed the dictionary and started to hit her own head with it, Spinel stopped her because he feared damage to the book, Ruby looked at Eriol who sat there dumbfounded. Upstairs all the cards under Kero's protection winced when all the cards under Yue's protection screamed their heads off. . . well except for the silent and the shadow who just faffed their arms a bit . . . Inside Eriol's mind, Clow Reed tried to sneak out the door but he was hauled back, as Eriol whispered a deadly threat in his ear.

"If I have to go through all this crap again . . . so do you!"

THE END. . . _or is it?_

And just so everyone has a happy, happy ending . . . 

That night Yue was very sick, so very sick he almost died, but everything was made okay when Eriol suddenly remembered that Clow *had* made a spell to make his guardians instantly better. . . this earned him a whupping from Sakura, and put him in bed for the next couple of weeks. . . which was fine by him because he had Tomoyo as his nurse, and yes. . . he did develop a need to be sponge bathed ever few hours. . .

Ten years later, Eriol and Tomoyo got married, Sakura, Meilin and Ruby were bridesmaids, Touya and Yue were ring bearers, and Kero and Suppi were the best guardians . . . Syaoran, after being kidnapped and hogged-tied for forty-eight hours, finally agreed to be the best man . . .

Sakura and Syaoran, who also got married, much to the annoyance of his relatives – but screw them since he's the clan head and he can do just as he damn well pleases - now reside in Hong Kong, but, because Tomoyo and Eriol are so damn rich, they all can easily fly to see the new happy Li's. Sakura and Syaoran now have six adorable children who they named Yue, Kero, Ruby, Spinel, Tomoyo-Meilin, and Eriol-Touya . . . Eriol-Touya is always referred to as 'E.T.' and rarely calls home . . .

Eriol and Sakura combined their powers so they could give Keroberos and Spinel Sun an extra false form. Keroberos now has one false form where he is a small, stuffed animal type thing with wings and one where he's a twenty year old, blonde dread-locked, beach boy . . . who, incidentally, apologised to Ruby for throwing his breakfast over her . . . they too are now live-in-lovers, although have no children . . . because they are magic, silly! And as a personal favour, Keroberos wishes it to be known that he is a god in bed, and Ruby wishes it to be known that she is one as well . . . 

Spinel Sun is also with a human form, although he looks a little more like Eriol with Yue's facial structure, he frowns a lot and thus reminded Meilin so much of Syaoran that they have fallen in love too . . . they also happily reside in Hong Kong, and he is now teaching her the wonders that is the arts, science and opera . . . he has yet to convince her that sesquidelophobia or rather Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia is actually a word . . .

Touya, Yue and Yuki are also happily married, although they had to go to Hawaii to perform the ritual, Yuki loved it, Yue hated it as the volcano erupted and it took him three whole weeks to get the ash out of his hair, Touya says the honeymoon was brilliant . . . and, according to a certain emerald eyed source who is very close to him, but whose name will not be mentioned as she fears reprisals from her brother, he hasn't stopped *grinning* since . . .      

Doctor Megalomania and Clow Reed are both now attending WBA –Writer's Block Anonymous – and have discovered true love . . . Clow thinks it might go somewhere . . . Dr Megalomania is hoping to convince Clow to create a replica of Yue for her . . . or failing that, giving her all his power, which would lead to her completing her goals of world domination, dictatorship over the universe and handing her English coursework in on time . . . 

-----------------------

And Now It's Time For LEAVE IT TO DOCTOR MEGALOMANIA!!!

DrM: Konnichiwa!!

Yue: Didn't you swear that chapter thirteen was going to be the last one?

DrM: Yes I did . . .

Yue: But?

DrM: This end-dy bit didn't quite fit and. . .

Yue: And?

DrM: I'm superstitious like that . . . thirteen ain't a kind number to me . . . pity me for things attack me on Friday the thirteenth!!

Yue: [rolls eyes, reads] what the hell are you on?

DrM: Love, love, love!!

Ringo: All you need is love!

Yue: I think we should make a run for it!

Sakura and Syaoran: Six kids?!

Eriol and Tomoyo: Sponge baths?!

Touya, Yuki and Yue: Hawaii?!

Ruby and Keroberos: [reads] Eww! [look at each other] EWWWW!!!

Spinel and Meilin: YOU SAID YOU WOULDN'T TELL ANYONE ABOUT US!!! 

Entire group swivel to look at them, group shudder and look away. 

Firey:  I think I speak with the rest of the Sakura cards, when I demand that we have our own fanfic! 

 DrM: And you'll get it . . . later . . . promise! [Turns to readers] I'm aware that this wasn't the strongest fic I've ever written . . . and it was kinda slap dash in places, but I'm hoping you had a great time! And so . . . until next time. . .

Yue-bella and Kero-ette: Make sure you join us in '_Whoops! Didn't mean to do that!!_' [Kero and Yue's eyes bug out, they turn slowly to look at Clow, who shrugs]

Clow: You really have to wait and see . . .

Hei-ying: And if you'd rather read something a little more serious . . . come join me in '_In This Tainted Soul . . ._'

DrM: But until then . . .

DrM, Keroberos, Yue, Spinel, Ruby, Eriol, Tomoyo, Syaoran, Sakura, Touya, Yuki, Clow, all the Sakura cards, Darth Vader, Luke, 3-cpo, r2-d2, the Beatles and everyone else: [join hands, and bows] PLEASE R&R!! ARIGATO AND GOOD NIGHT!!

Everyone stands on stage and takes a huge bow . . . and is transported about the U.S.S Enterprise because Clow wants to show everyone his latest reincarnation as Malcolm Reed . . . and then everyone sits down in a big love circle and Ringo, Paul, John and George leads everyone in a round of "Sakura in the sky with Syaoran . . ."


End file.
